


Blue jeans and blue sky

by Evil_Keshi



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Enemies to Lovers, First Time, Getting Together, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2018-04-22
Packaged: 2019-02-22 00:42:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 57,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13155522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evil_Keshi/pseuds/Evil_Keshi
Summary: Magnus was seven years old when he arrived in Colorado to start his new life - with new parents, a new language, a new everything. Making friends would have helped him, except that his first encounter with the neighbours' kids didn't go too well, and Magnus vowed to hate the Lightwoods forever.Forever. No matter what.





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! This is the prologue of my new chaptered story, I hope you will like this short beginning! I will try to give you regular updates, as much as possible, although I'm not sure I'll manage to be as quick as I was with _Unlocked_. We shall see :)

  


Magnus was tired when he got out of the big plane in Denver, Colorado, clutching his Teddy bear with the missing eye and the ripped ear against his heart with his left hand, the other one tightly closed around the fingers of his new daddy.

Jimmy, that was his name. But he could call him daddy if he wanted to, and Magnus thought that he wanted that. He had never had a daddy before, neither had he had a mommy. Jimmy - daddy - had told him that his new mommy would be waiting for them at the airport and now that they were there, he was slowly beginning to forget the pain in his ears - big planes were cool but they hurt too, especially when they took off and landed - and he was looking everywhere for her.

Ji... Daddy had showed him her picture, back in Indonesia. She had a weak heart so she couldn't fly, not like his new daddy, and she'd had to wait in America, but daddy had showed him her picture and had even allowed him to keep it during the flight. He didn't know her yet but it had been reassuring, helping him not to cry when he felt like his eardrums were torn apart, because he knew that she was waiting for them, for him, waiting to see him and hold him in her arms.

Daddy had been in Indonesia for a few weeks, several times. The first time, to visit the orphanage in Jakarta and see the kids. The second time, one month later, to see Magnus. The third time, to ask if Magnus wanted to come with him to live in America, where his wife was. Jimmy had taken Magnus on his knees to show him pictures on a old computer, the one in Bapak's office that the kids usually weren't allowed in. Magnus had seen high buildings, taller than trees, with lots and lots of glass windows, and then he had been showed green lands surrounded by brown mountains with white tops. If they had the same ones in Indonesia, Magnus had no idea.

Magnus liked Jimmy. Daddy. He had helped him to pack the few things he had at the orphanage and had carried his little luggage for him. Kept him entertained in the plane, teaching him some words of English. Daddy spoke Indonesian very well, because he had a friend from Bali, and even though his pronunciation was funny sometimes, he was good. Magnus could keep talking Indonesian with him if he wanted to, but he also had to learn English because in the States, everybody spoke English and he would have to know the language to use it at school and with his mommy.

Based on the picture daddy had showed him, mommy had long, dark hair and clear blue eyes. Her name was Anna and Jimmy had whispered in his ear that she already loved him, so he didn't have to be afraid to meet her.

It was strange to Magnus, but it was a good sort of strange. He was seven years old and it was the first time in his life that he was loved like this... He knew that he had a real mother and a real father somewhere in Indonesia but they had never loved him, or if they had, then they had chosen not to show it to him when they had left him on the orphanage threshold, a few weeks old and with nothing but a note where his first name and his birthday date were written in neat, round letters: _Magnus, 8th of December 2000_.

"D... Daddy?" the kid asked hesitantly in English, carefully trying the word on the tip of his tongue for the first time. "Where mommy?"

Jimmy literally beamed at him and Magnus smiled, showing a small gap between his front teeth - he had lost one tooth two days prior and daddy had told him to place it under his pillow, so that the tooth fairy would take it and give him a coin or two in exchange. Magnus didn't believe that the fairy existed at all but the next morning, there was an actual bill of five American dollars under his pillow, and it was now carefully hidden inside a pair of socks in his luggage.

"We will find mommy after we get our bags, okay?" Jimmy answered in English, speaking very slowly so that Magnus understood the words.

He didn't get everything of course, but he heard _mommy_ and Jimmy's gentle tone, so he guessed it was okay. She was there, somewhere, and she wouldn't leave without him. Not her.

Magnus kept his grip tight on Jimmy's hand, scared to let go and get lost amidst all the people he saw: mostly adults, tall and scary and focused, walking fast and not really paying attention to the carefree kids getting in their way, so he glued himself to his daddy's leg.

He looked at everything in awe, from the planes he could see through the windows of the airport to the rolling rail with the bags and suitcases, from the screens announcing a _cancelled flight_ to Rome, whatever it might mean, to a security agent discreetly sipping on a coffee.

And then, Magnus saw her. His mommy, with her long hair, her smile and the hopeful happiness in her blue eyes. Jimmy took him to her and he introduced them to each other with a grin that made Magnus feel like the sun had just entered the room and he smiled at them both, slipping each of his little hands into his new parents' bigger ones, ready to start a new life with a new family.

  


  


Back in Jakarta, Jimmy had showed Magnus a few pictures of their home in Colorado; the boy had first noticed that it was really, really big, and daddy had explained to him that it was a ranch. However, actually seeing the house, located in a valley between the rocky mountains where the sun of July shone brightly, was a whole other level of reality: walking on the path that went through a garden full of flowers of the like Magnus had never seen and that led to the front door felt surreal, like a dream. The house itself was mostly built from wood and seemed comfy enough; Anna told him that he had his own room up there, and he was delighted to find out that it was true. While he had been forced to share a room with four other boys in Jakarta, he would have one for himself here, his bed, his sheets, his toys and his clothes. The bedroom wasn't too large but a bed and a desk fit perfectly in the space, with a chest next to a wide window opening onto the meadows.

And then, there were the horses.

Lots of them, beautiful American Quarter Horses galloping in the fenced grassy areas outside, or whining gently from inside the stables. Magnus had never approached a horse in his whole life but seeing them like this, looking fierce and strong, their muscles moving in harmony under their sleek coat, he realised that he wanted to. They were impressive but not scary, like a solid but peaceful force, on the constant lookout while looking relaxed at the same time.

Then Jimmy showed him Bill, the tiny pony with a forelock so long and thick that his eyes were barely visible, and the boy reached out with a slightly shaky hand to pet his nose; Bill snorted and Magnus' hand came back a little wet after that, but he laughed and caressed the pony more confidently, although still gingerly.

He would be happy here.

  


  


The first weeks took their toll on Magnus. He was growing used to Jimmy and Anna, who loved him like he had been their son from the start, and he liked them back - he supposed. He didn't know them very well yet. However, he knew that they were good people, kind to him and to their animals, kind to the young men and women who worked at the ranch and took care of the horses, and kind to one another. Magnus liked to see them together and he often watched them with interest: back in Indonesia, he had never seen how a couple, _parents_ , would interact, hence his bafflement at Jimmy's and Anna's behaviour.

They smiled at each other a lot, kissed each other in the morning, finished each other's sentences... Magnus didn't think he had ever witnessed such harmony between two people - although he didn't have much experience with people... All beings he had known in his life so far were the other children at the orphanage and Bapak, as well as Sinta and Rika, the two young women who cooked the kids' meals and made sure that they had clean clothes, didn't argue with one another and washed up before eating.

Magnus wasn't used to being surrounded by many people, which made his first weeks in Colorado... Intense. Overwhelming. There were Jimmy and Anna of course, which he was trying to navigate a parents-son relationship with; Hodge, the English teacher he was working with twice a week so that his knowledge of the language would have improved by the time he started school, in September; Jeremiah and Zachariah, two teen brothers who worked at the ranch during the summer and immediately took a liking to Magnus; Valentine the scary vet and many more.

Then, there were the neighbours, from the other ranches around the land, and their kids who absolutely wanted to see and talk to the newcomer, the stranger from Indonesia. In spite of his need for the tranquillity and peace that would have helped him to adjust to this new country and its language, Magnus found himself under the spotlight, until he dared tell Anna that he wanted to spend more time with her and Jimmy instead of having to meet the other children.

He half-expected to be snapped at, told that he would do what he was asked to, just like Bapak would have told the children at the orphanage. However, Anna looked delighted and glad to hear his request.

"Of course, Magnus!" she exclaimed once he'd shyly spoke to her. "I'm so sorry, Jimmy and I should have thought that you would need some rest..."

She then opened her arms in the clear intent to hug him, slowly, giving him enough time to decide whether he wanted the embrace or not. He did. He craved it. He wanted to feel like their little boy, for real. Magnus hesitated one more second, then he took a step forward and tentatively closed the distance between them. Anna kneeled to wrap her arms around his shoulders and press him against her chest; she closed her eyes to hold back her tears when she felt the child's small hands awkwardly grab her shirt, as if he didn't know how to hug her back properly. She realised that he probably didn't, since the orphanage in Jakarta had not been a place for big hugs and embraces, and she held him even tighter.

Also, Magnus started to take horse-riding lessons with Ji... with his father, and although it was exhausting as well, the boy welcomed the physical fatigue that turned out to be a nice change from the mental efforts he had to make in other situations. Bill was a kind pony and a patient teacher, never going too fast, never flinching at any strange noise coming from the stables.

Bill quickly became Magnus' best friend, the one he whispered gentle words in Indonesian to, the one he shared his secrets with: his fear to start school in September, to fail at making friends, to be laughed at because his skin didn't have the same colour as most people's here did, or because he didn't speak English very well yet. Bill would always comfort him, breathing against his palm, brushing his warm nose along the kid's cheek, as if he understood his tiny rider's concerns.

Said tiny rider was quite proud of his progress at horse-riding: while he had never approached a horse in Jakarta, Magnus was slowly getting better and better at handling Bill and the calmest of the big horses. By the end of July, he could put a halter on most of them, except those who teased him by raising their heads as high as they could, too high for him to reach, and he could saddle up Bill - the other, bigger saddles were too heavy for him though. However, he was not yet ready to put on the bridle himself: even though he was a pony, Bill had huge teeth and Magnus was afraid of losing his fingers if he got the bit anywhere close to Bill's mouth. Still, he was doing great, up until that day he started to learn the trot and how to keep his balance instead of bouncing on his pony's back.

He was riding Bill in the sandy arena alongside the road, with high wooden fences all around to keep the horses from escaping. That day, two boys had climbed up to watch Magnus during his horse-riding lesson... From what he remembered, they were the Lightwood boys, their closest neighbours: one of them was blond, with fair eyebrows raised in a clear lack of admiration for the young rider, and he was taller than the other child, who looked a bit frailer and had messy dark hair.

They were watching Magnus struggle with keeping his balance while not pulling too much on the reins and paying attention to where he was going at the same time, and the boy was growing self-conscious as the blond kid's disinterest turned into laughter.

"So lame," the blond sneered when Bill and Magnus walked by, not too loud so that Jimmy wouldn't hear, "Can't even trot properly..."

And that was probably true: the boy couldn't follow the quick pace of Bill's small legs, he was bouncing up and down on the saddle, that he was gripping tightly, too afraid to let go, and his feet kept slipping off the stirrups... But the truth of that statement didn't make it hurt any less. Did it mean that Magnus would never get better? He had to, he had, because everybody around there rode horses, he had to fit in!

"You'll never be a real rider," the blond taunted him again, the next time Bill came up at the boys' level, "Look at yourself, holding onto that saddle like you'll drown without it!"

"Jace..." the other kid started, probably, Magnus thought, to bring the blond boy's attention to some other flaw in his (lack of) technique.

"Trust me, Alec," Jace interrupted his brother, "He'll never be one of us."

 _He'll never be one of us_. That snide remark made its way right into Magnus' heart like a dagger slicing and cutting, throwing every single one of his insecurities right into his face: what if he never belonged there, just like Alec and Jace said? Magnus would have liked to be their friend but... What if every other kid was like these two boys? Would he be all alone at school, would everyone laugh at him?

Magnus' fear quickly turned into anger though, because who were these boys to tell him all these horrible, hurtful things? Pulling on the reins a bit clumsily, Magnus stopped his pony and turned to the boys, oblivious to the tears spilling over the corners of his eyes.

"I hate you!" he screamed, surprising both the Lightwood kids and Jimmy, as well as Bill, who flinched a little from hearing the distress in his rider's voice.

"Magnus... What's..." Jimmy started, striding up to his son and his pony.

"I hate you!" he screamed again to the boys, before he switched to Indonesian in his anger, "I'll hate you forever and I'll show you who's the best, you'll see! I'll become the best rider and you'll beg to be my friends!"

"What did you just say to me?" Jace growled, certain that Magnus had called him names, but then Jimmy was by his son's side and the blond kid jumped from the fence, grumbling his brother's name so that they could leave together.

"Magnus," Jimmy asked in worry, catching Bill's reins and squeezing his son's shoulders with his free hand, "What happened? Don't cry, sweetheart, don't cry..."

"They're mean!" he cried out, hiding his teary face into his father's chest, "They said horrible things, I hate them!"

"Jace and Alec?" Jimmy checked, his eyes widening, "They're good kids, usually... What did they say to you?"

The young boy calmed down a little when he realised that his father believed him, that he was willing to listen to him even though he had known the Lightwoods for way longer than he had his own son. Being allowed to speak freely about whatever was bothering him was new to him: back in the orphanage, the children couldn't tell the adults if they argued with each other - because the grown-ups wouldn't care. Jimmy did though, so Magnus quietly summed up the boys' words.

"They said I would never be one of you..." he whispered, eyes cast down, too afraid to see in Jimmy's own that he shared the Lightwoods' thoughts.

However, he quickly understood that he had nothing to fear.

"Magnus..." his father said on a low tone, sounding as if he was experiencing the same pain as the one his son was going through. "Forget what they said. It's not true. We love you and you belong here as much as Alec and Jace do. We _want_ you here, sweetheart. I'll talk to the boys, don't worry. I know they're having a hard time with their parents at the moment, Maryse and Robert argue quite a lot these days but... It doesn't excuse their words. They can't take it out on you."

Magnus sniffled and nodded, relieved that Jimmy was on his side. That was what parents did, wasn't it? Supporting their kids through hardships?

"Come on," Jimmy added, gently nudging Bill forward, desperate to find something to clear Magnus' head, "What about a little ride in the forest? It's nice, you'll see! There's a river not far, Bill loves to take a bath in these waters... Do you want to go?"

The little boy nodded once again, thankful for the distraction: he didn't want to think about these terrible kids anymore... Still, he told himself even as Bill took his first steps on the path through the forest, he would not forget nor forgive the Lightwoods' words, ever. They had no right to treat him like they had.

So Magnus vowed to hate these boys forever. No matter what.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading so far! I hope you enjoyed this prologue, feel free to leave a comment to tell me exactly what you think of it. Until next time!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Thank you so much for the positive feedback on the prologue, I hope you will like the way this story goes and that it won't disappoint :) Enjoy this first full chapter!

  


Magnus' first day of spring break should have started in a beautiful way: he had planned on putting on his favourite outfit and grabbing a late breakfast with his best friends in their favourite coffee shop in town, and then he wanted to complain loudly and endlessly about their math teacher who had given them way too much homework to do. They were supposed to relax, forget about school a little, weren't they? So how could they do that when they had to solve all these awful equations?

Sadly, Magnus' plan regarding breakfast and good company got ruined as soon as he pushed open the door of _Tea for two_ and literally bumped into problems, problems that went by the names of Jace and Alec. They were walking out of the coffee shop just as Magnus tried to step inside and of course, of course, he had to collide with Blondie and his super hot coffee, that sloshed and spilled over the both of them.

"Watch out, Bane!" Jace growled, nearly barring his teeth as he waved his wet hand from side to side.

"You watch out!" Magnus shot back, furious, staring in disbelief at his left thigh and the fresh stain of coffee on the fabric of his fancy trousers. "Do you have any idea how much these cost me? Not all of us wear flannel and jeans! You destroyed my pants!"

"Don't be so dramatic," Jace scoffed, and Magnus' eyes narrowed, "You..."

"Okay, that's enough," Alec interfered then, giving his brother a few napkins and offering one or two to Magnus as well (except that he didn't take them and glared at the dark-haired boy instead), "What Jace meant was to apolo..."

"No I didn't!" the blond man interrupted his brother.

"I don't care," Magnus snapped at Alec. "I don't need nor want to hear his apology, nor do I need your help to deal with him. So back off."

Alec recoiled as if Magnus' words had physically punched him in the face and the small smile calling for appeasement and calm that he had been sporting during Jace and Magnus' altercation fell, before his expression hardened.

"Fine," he grumbled, "Jace, come on."

Alec stormed out of the coffee shop, quickly followed by his brother who made sure to smack into Magnus' shoulder as he did so. Massaging his left arm, Magnus didn't stop groaning as he made his way toward his usual table, where his friends were already sitting and looking at him - like half the customers, to be honest.

"What a remarkable entrance," Ragnor said in lieu of greetings, "Lovely show, thank you."

"I hate them," Magnus answered, sitting down.

"Yes, we're aware," Raphael sighed and rolled his eyes, "You've been telling us that almost every day for the past ten years. Maybe it's time to let it go."

"Never. They're assholes, they..."

"Jace might be a cocky little shit but Alec is actually quite sweet," Catarina said before her friend could finish. "You would know, if you gave him a chance... He just helped Raphael with his French assignment."

Oh, perfect. So Alexander Lightwood was a nice person now? Not. Possible. They were enemies. They hated each other, they competed against each other, both at school and during horse-riding competitions, and everyone knew that they'd better avoid creating situations in which Magnus, Jace and Alec found themselves together. The resulting insults, screams and even punches, that had been thrown around in more than one occasion, were frightening to say the least.

"Can we please forget about them and get on with our lives?" Magnus asked. "I didn't came here to talk about these idiots."

Thankfully, his friends accepted to switch to a lighter and funnier topic, so Magnus relaxed and tried to forget about the ruined leg of his pants by ordering the fanciest and sweetest drink he could think of. Still, even though he had told his friends that he didn't want to dwell on the Lightwoods any longer, a part of his brain was still focused on Catarina's words: Alec Lightwood was _sweet_.

Right. Did Catarina order an Irish coffee with too much whiskey in it? There could not exist another explanation - or maybe his friend was much more rational and objective than him, although Magnus didn't like that possibility too much, mostly because it was true.

But no, he reasoned and held viciously onto that thought, Alec Lightwood wasn't sweet. He was as awful as Jace and... Well, all right, _fine_ , so maybe he had tried to make his brother apologise back there, just a few minutes before, but that was only because he didn't want to make a scene in the coffee shop, not because he was _sweet_.

His first meeting with Jace and Alec went a way back, ten years already, but all these years hadn't changed Magnus' thoughts about the siblings... If anything, time and all the bits he had learned about the Lightwoods had strengthened and fed his hatred. One of the most important information he had gathered was that Jace was adopted, just like him, and he hadn't understood why the blond boy had been so awful to him the first time they had talked. Jace should have understood Magnus' desire to fit in and belong better than anyone else, instead of making him feel like an unwelcome stranger.

And Alec... Well. Magnus had conflicted feelings about that one - but he still hated him just as much as his brother. When he thought about it though, his memories showed him a small boy who hadn't said anything about him, neither mean nor kind... But that was the problem, wasn't it? Alec hadn't said _anything_.

Keeping quiet when someone was being bullied was only encouraging the bullying in the first place, Magnus knew that, but Alec had been a kid, shorter than Jace and probably a bit scared of calling him out on his bullshit. He didn't know how he would have reacted, were he in the same situation.

Magnus often told himself that it would have been fine, maybe, if they had talked and realised that they could be friends instead of yelling at each other every time they saw one another's face. They hadn't. His dad, however, had met with Maryse and Robert to discuss the problematic attitude of their sons, who had apparently been punished accordingly. It hadn't made the situation easier to deal with, though, and resentment had grown into the hearts of all three kids.

School had started and Magnus had been almost immediately targeted by the Lightwood siblings in the schoolyard, pointing at him and introducing him to everyone else as the novice horse-rider, which got all the other children looking at him with wide, wondering eyes in the best case, but with contempt in the worst. It had taken the intervention of a boy with dark hair and a cold voice to make them all stop staring - and that was how Raphael and he had become friends.

Sometimes Magnus wondered how they still were, when Raphael could eat disgusting things such as Bloody Mary muffins, an evil pastry filled with celery and tomatoes smashed into puree, at nine in the morning no less.

"Did you hear the news?" Raphael asked around his mouthful of muffin when he noticed that Magnus' attention was on him, "Clary finally said yes to Jace to go on a date with him."

"What?!" Magnus exclaimed, nearly choking on his drink, "She did what, now? Please, tell me you're joking!"

"He isn't," Ragnor answered, slapping his friend on the back none too gently. "Come on, she's a big girl, let her date whomever she wants!"

"But not Jace!" the other insisted, "She deserves so much better... That Golden Retriever is not a good choice!"

Raphael snickered at the nickname, while Ragnor rolled his eyes and downed his over-sugared Moroccan mint tea. Catarina set down her cup of (most-likely-spiked) coffee and smirked, locking eyes with Magnus.

"You're one to talk about bad choices in one's love life," she pointed out, "After all, you..."

"Didn't we agree to never mention Camille ever again?" Magnus interrupted her with a subtle raise of his eyebrows.

"You did, not I," Catarina grumbled, although she did let it go.

Camille was a bad memory, a serious mistake, and a name he didn't want to hear anymore. He hated her, almost as much as he hated Jace and Alec... It seemed like he disliked a whole lot of people but Magnus swore he wasn't usually so cranky or hateful: he laughed a lot when he was in good company, his sense of humour was wicked and he loved his friends and his family more than they could possibly imagine.

Besides, he didn't hate the whole Lightwood family: Max was adorable, maybe because he was just an eight-year-old boy, and Magnus enjoyed his afternoons shopping with Isabelle very much, thank you. These two weren't responsible for their stupid brothers, were they? Izzy was a delight to be around and she didn't take sides, neither for her siblings' nor for Magnus' benefit, although she did sometimes apologise on her brothers' behalf.

"They are jealous," she'd explained to him not two weeks ago, "Mom and dad are always fighting nowadays and I know Alec is scared they're going to divorce... Your parents are so in love it's almost gross though. Jace and Alec just wish they had what you do."

"They should be thankful to have parents at all," Magnus had grumbled.

Isabelle hadn't dared answer that, unsure of what to say, and Magnus had started to talk about something else, aware that he had made her uncomfortable. But he was right, wasn't he? The Lightwoods children had parents. Of course Magnus had Jimmy and Anna too and yes, he considered them his parents because they _were_ , in everything but blood, but there would always be a fragile scar on his heart, an old wound about to reopen at any time. Because the woman and the man who had _created_ him, brought him into this world, had stuck around only long enough to give him a name.

Shaking his head, Magnus pushed away this kind of depressing thoughts and tuned into the conversation at hand once again, just in time to hear Catarina sum up the Lightwoods' love life. They were apparently at the gossip-sharing part of their daily talks. Magnus loved it.

"So," she said, "Simon and Isabelle have been together for two months and now, Clary is dating Jace."

"She agreed on one date," Raphael nuanced, "That's different. There's no saying it will go further than that."

"I bet it will," Ragnor smirked.

"Yeah," Magnus scoffed, "and next thing we know, someone else will be stupid enough to date Alec as well! Poor girl..."

When three pairs of disbelieving eyes turned toward him, Magnus realised that he must have said something wrong, although he didn't understand what. He felt like he was missing some vital information there and his eyebrows rose as he asked:

"What's wrong? Did someone already ask him out?"

"Well..." Raphael drawled, obviously enjoying knowing something that his friend didn't, "Lydia asked him out last Friday, right before spring break."

"And?" Magnus urged him on, "Tell me what happened! Did he say yes? He doesn't deserve her!"

"He said no," Ragnor quickly said to appease his friend's thirst for intel, "and he told her that it wasn't her fault, that she was an awesome person and that anyone would be lucky to even stand a chance with her..."

"Told you he was sweet," Catarina chimed in.

"Then why didn't he say yes?" Magnus enquired, now too curious for his own sanity - he did not care about Alec Lightwood, damn it!

"Because he's gay," Raphael finally revealed, all too happy to witness Magnus' face lose all colour.

"What?" he whispered, praying that his friend was just joking, making fun of him, because...

Alec Lightwood, gay? That would be a disaster. Magnus had eyes and he had been in the front row to witness his neighbour's transformation, to see him grow from a scrawny kid to a handsome man - yes, he might hate the guy but he wasn't blind and he was smart enough to admit that Alec's body looked... Well. That boy was hot.

Magnus would know: he had often seen Alec work shirtless in the barn or the fields, sweaty under the sun in the summer, with his stupid messy hair and his stupid smile when Izzy came outside to offer her brother a glass of water.

He could easily hate Alec, just like it was easy to hate his cocky brother who thought too highly of himself (hopefully Clary would calm him down a bit), but if what Raphael said was actually true... Magnus was doomed.

He could deal with the fact that Alec was attractive as long as he hated him and satisfied himself with their current I-will-punch-you-in-the-face-if-you-look-my-way situation. However, Magnus was way too sympathetic for his own good and knowing that Alec was gay posed a problem: he couldn't help but put himself in the guy's shoes and imagine how hard it must be at home, between parents who kept arguing and who most likely didn't agree with their son's sexuality. Maryse and Robert Lightwood were not the most open-minded people and kept a tight leash on their children, who weren't supposed to step out of the path laid out for them. Surely a gay son was not included in their plans.

Ragnor's mocking voice suddenly brought him back to reality:

"I think you broke him, Raphael."

"Earth to Magnus?" Catarina called, "Is your brain still working?"

"I don't think it ever has," Raphael snarked, before he moaned in pain as Magnus elbowed him in the ribs.

"Shut up," he said, "I'm trying to process the news."

Catarina chuckled at that and Magnus narrowed his eyes as he grabbed his drink, not too pleased by his friend's clear amusement and the knowing spark shining in her gaze, as if she knew something that he didn't. It seemed to have become the tendency for that morning and the young man wasn't sure to like it much.

"What?" he grumbled around the bright pink straw in his drink.

"Nothing," she giggled, until she changed her mind and added, "Or are you trying to process the fact that you could sleep with Alec instead of glaring at him every second he spends in your close vicinity?"

She had done it on purpose, Magnus thought when he choked on his drink again and started to cough, only calming down - somewhat - when Ragnor thoughtfully patted his back.

"Don't say such disgusting things," he growled then, "It's too early for that."

Catarina didn't look sorry at all but she shrugged, raising her hands in surrender as if saying _your loss_. But seriously, what loss? A roll in the hay with Alec Lightwood was not - and would never be - his goal in life.

"He's good-looking," Magnus eventually admitted aloud, knowing that denying it would only make Catarina's smirk widen in front of such suspicious stubbornness. "But he's also a dick. Can't be both gorgeous and kind, I guess."

"Would you bang him if he were?" Ragnor asked with interest, which got Raphael to abandon his breakfast.

"Can you please stop discussing Magnus' sex life? I'm trying to eat, here," he complained.

Magnus could have kissed him for coming to his rescue so subtly, except that he knew all too well that Raphael would rather die than receive a grateful kiss from his best friend. Besides, he was still eating (or trying to, as he'd said) his Bloody Mary muffins, which, ew.

"So, any of you wants to have a movie marathon tonight?" Raphael suggested in a brutal change of conversation, eager to forget all about Magnus' intimate life, and his friends indulged him.

Catarina immediately nodded, saying they should enjoy their spring break to the fullest and not sleep at night - it would be time to sleep when they went back to school, she insisted, which didn't really sound like a good idea.

"Depends on the movies," Ragnor answered unhelpfully, even though they all knew that he would go to Raphael's anyway and that they would chose their first movie to watch mere minutes before putting it on. "Magnus?"

"I can't tonight," he admitted with a sigh. "It's my turn to feed the horses this evening and I'm supposed to look after Sapphire for the night."

"Right!" Catarina exclaimed, "She's due to foal this week, isn't she?"

"Yeah, or maybe next week, we're not really sure," Magnus said with a shrug.

Sapphire was a little minx who'd jumped the fences more than once last year and never with some other purpose than meeting the (very) friendly stallion two paddocks down the gently sloping hill behind the stables. Since it had happened several times, the Bane's couldn't be certain of the exact day Sapphire and Pilgrim had tied the knot, so to speak, and they could only speculate about the date the mare would actually give birth.

"Can we come see the foal once it's born?" Raphael asked with barely concealed excitement, and Magnus nodded with a smile.

It would always surprise him how Raphael, who always sported a slightly bored or downright annoyed expression on his otherwise handsome face, brightened up as soon as he saw a horse. He had never wanted to ride one though, too scared of what could happen to him if his horse bolted in fright, but watching them and grooming their smooth coat until they were clean and shiny appeased him. So of course, Magnus would never even think of saying that Raphael couldn't pay Sapphire and her foal a visit.

"Have you decided on the name yet?" Ragnor enquired with a shit-eating grin, "Because if you haven't, remember that I told you about some of my ideas..."

"Shut up, I'm not calling that foal _Ragnor Junior_ ," Magnus protested with a mighty roll of his eyes, before he admitted with a sigh, "I haven't had much time to think of a name, mom and dad neither. School was awful, I've been training with Horcrux a lot for the last few weeks and..."

"I'm still not over that bloody name," Ragnor interrupted him with a laugh, "And to think you won't even consider Ragnor Junior for the new foal!"

"Shut up, I was in a Harry Potter phase," Magnus pouted.

His friends laughed, well aware that it wasn't a phase at all and that Magnus still had that large poster of Daniel Radcliffe taped to the wall above his bed - besides, several horses other than Horcrux had been named after characters of the books, like Malfoy the cream gelding, which was a convincing proof that Magnus' inspiration often came from his beloved Harry Potter series.

"Anyway," he added, "Horcrux's name fits him. He's got the soul of a demon when he wants to. I love him."

Ragnor sighed and mumbled something that Magnus couldn't catch but seemed to be about ridiculous horse names - oh, the irony. He would have loved to argue with his friend about how amazing the names Horcrux and Malfoy were and how well the horses responded to them but sadly, Catarina spoke of something else before Magnus could even open his mouth.

"You'll ride Horcrux for your next competition?" she enquired and when her friend nodded, she asked again, "When?"

"In two days..."

Magnus trailed off, the topic making him a bit jittery since it would be his first horse show with Horcrux, who was fairly young and not yet used to the ambient noises and unknown horses the competition arenas were swarming with. He would need to keep calm though, if he wanted to help Horcrux relax as well: that horse was just like a sponge, absorbing all and every emotion from his rider and making it his own.

"I heard Alec and Jace will ride then too," Raphael said, glancing at Magnus and waiting for his reaction, that came quickly.

"Good!" he exclaimed, eyes sparkling with the anticipation of the challenge and ignoring the way Catarina shook her head in disapproval. "Very good."

It was time to show the Lightwood siblings just how skilled he had become, how much progress he had made since their last competition. Magnus would then rub it in their faces and he was going to enjoy every single second of it. Every. Single. One.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts and opinions, it's always a delight to read them. Until next time!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Thank you for your comments, kudos and subscriptions so far, I'm glad you like the story! Here comes the next chapter, in which Alec and Magnus share some time together...

  


Magnus had lost the competition.

Well, that wasn't exactly true: above fifty riders had gathered for this horse show and Magnus had ranked eleventh so it wasn't exactly a bad score, per se. In fact, his heart had swelled with happiness and he was so, so proud of Horcrux! His boy had been so brave, so curious, too: his ears had never stopped moving, turning to all sides to hear every sound properly, and yet he had remained quite focused under the saddle.

Horcrux had only flinched a few times, once when rain had started to fall - of course it had to rain! - and once when an idiot had opened an umbrella right next to him. Horcrux had not exactly known how to react in front of that big, black, odd shape and he had stopped all of a sudden before jumping aside, as if the umbrella would eat him. As far as his horse knew, it could very well do just that, so Magnus didn't blame him. Besides, it had given him more ideas to work with Horcrux in the upcoming days and weeks: he would need to desensitise him to the fear of the umbrella.

So yes, he was satisfied with his result, especially since Jace had ranked fifteenth: even though he was only four places ahead of him, Magnus enjoyed his small victory. He could already hear what Catarina would have to say about that, _don't compare yourself to others, it's not healthy!_ but this time, just this time, he didn't really care about her usually wise advice. Jace had lost to him and the thought made him elated, period.

Still, Magnus had lost, too. Alec had ended up fourth and surely he was infuriated to have missed the opportunity to stand on the podium - and he had been so close to! Incidentally, the reason of his defeat looked a lot like Magnus': rain had not made it easy, for any of the riders, and while Horcrux had gotten scared of the wild umbrella that had appeared out of nowhere, Alec had dealt with another sort of problem... The slippery arena.

The sand under the horses' hooves had turned to mud in some places where the ground couldn't fully absorb the heavy rain and as more and more horses trampled the arena, it had become as slithery as an ice-skating rink - well, almost as much. As a consequence, Alec's mare, a gigantic animal with a coat as dark as her owner's soul, had slipped in the mud and panicked. Her rider had taken his time to reassure her, something that Magnus could understand and even admire, but it had cost Alec precious seconds and thus, points in ranking. Not that Magnus was disappointed, although he admitted that the other boy had skills, for he would have cringed in bitterness if Alec had won more than he already had.

Oh, Magnus would get over it, of course. He always did anyway, he was used to get back on his feet after being pushed around... Both literally and metaphorically, and more often than not by Alec and Jace themselves.

So, after the competition, he drove back to his parents' ranch with Raphael and Ragnor who had come to support him and together, they took care of Horcrux, hurrying him along the alley between the house and the stables to get inside as quickly as possible. It kept raining heavily and Magnus wondered if he would be able to go for a walk in the forest with Bill later, like he had planned on doing.

"Cat should have come," Raphael complained as they rubbed Horcrux with clean straw to dry off his sweaty coat as well as they could, what with Magnus' horse fidgeting with impatience, "She always gives him treats, at least he would have stopped moving!"

"Family dinner," Ragnor said to explain Catarina's absence, "She couldn't just skip it. Her mom spent her whole day cooking for this yesterday, so she couldn't disappoint her."

Magnus nodded his agreement while he scratched Horcrux between his ears in hopes to calm him down a little, thinking with a longing sigh about Mrs. Loss' cooking - a true blessing, really - when he would have to satisfy himself with a sandwich for his late lunch. He couldn't cook to save his life, even though his mom had tried to teach him the basics, but she was working today and wouldn't rescue him...

"There are carrots in the kitchen," Magnus told Raphael when Horcrux turned around once again. "He'll love you if you give them to him."

"I'm not feeding him," his friend immediately protested, "I like my hands with five fingers each, thank you very much!"

Ragnor rolled his eyes once Raphael had walked out to fetch the carrots, now certain that he wouldn't catch him, and he looked at Magnus with wonder.

"You think he'll ever completely stop being afraid of horses?" he asked. "It could be nice if he finally agreed to ride with us, we could have fun going on a trip in the summer, maybe one week or more..."

"We should definitively do that," Magnus agreed with enthusiasm, already thinking of paths they could ride on, grassy knolls and... Oh! The river that streamed North of the forest was beautiful and perfect for taking a bath with the horses, it had been a while since he'd done it! They could start there, keep going in the wild and then make their way back within the week. Maybe more, even, if they gave a good rest to the horses and camped for a day or two in the same place...

But summer was still far away and Magnus would have time later to gather his friends and plan their trip thoroughly. They would only need to convince Raphael to go with them, willingly so if possible and if not, they would tie him to the saddle. He would kick and scream himself hoarse but... It could work.

When Raphael came back from the kitchen, carrots in hand and hair wet, he narrowed his eyes at Magnus upon seeing his mischievous smile but thought better not to ask, which was probably a good idea, since his reaction to Magnus' plan would have sent Horcrux in a fit of panic.

In the end, Raphael did give a carrot cut in half to the horse, under Ragnor's gentle encouragements and Magnus' watchful gaze. Their friend grimaced when Horcrux's lips and warm tongue touched his fingers, nearly yelping in fright, but he stood still and waited until the carrot had disappeared into Horcrux's avid mouth before doing as much as blinking.

That was a good start, Magnus thought as he led his horse back to his stall and kissed his nose soundly, only to have Horcrux shake his head in annoyance - so ungrateful. Maybe he could ask Raphael to take care of Sapphire's yet unborn foal with him, maybe a smaller and younger horse would help him relax completely around the others... Bill had certainly done that for Magnus himself when he was a little boy. They could try and see.

"Are you staying for lunch?" Magnus asked when he met his friends under the large arch at the entrance of the stables, the both of them watching the rain pour down with disheartened expressions.

"I'll pass," Raphael said with no heat, although he looked a bit disgruntled, "I'm already half-traumatised thanks to your horse, I won't let your dangerous sandwiches kill me."

"No offense," Ragnor added, "but I agree."

"Offense taken", Magnus groaned and crossed his arms against his chest, as if to protect himself from any other unsavoury remark against his cooking, "Don't insult my sandwiches."

"I'm not sure you can even call them sandwiches," Raphael pointed out, "More like safety hazards."

"Shut up!"

Raphael and Ragnor made a show of running away from Magnus when he shook his fist in their direction and they took off, laughing and cackling like two mad men under the rain. Rolling his eyes, Magnus let them be on their way and went inside to fix himself a quick lunch with one of his truly amazing sandwiches, thank you very much.

By the time he was done, the sky had stopped crying and although threatening clouds were still hanging above his head like Damocles' sword, Magnus thought he could safely enjoy some time outside without getting soaked, and he headed for Bill's stall.

"Who's been a good boy and is going to have an apple?" Magnus sing-songed as he approached and swung a red apple from hand to hand, a grin splitting his face in two when a shrill, enthusiastic neigh answered him.

Bill was so short that he couldn't see above the door of his stall and still, when Magnus looked inside, his pony was there, waiting for him with his two small and pointy ears pricking up. If horses could smile, Magnus didn't doubt that Bill would be grinning just like his once-upon-a-time rider. He lifted the latch and let the door swing on its hinges before he entered the stall, immediately kneeling in the middle of the fresh hay and straw to get down at Bill's level.

"Hello my little love," Magnus crooned, sliding his free hand up and down the neck of his pony, slowing down on the spots he knew Bill loved to get scratched.

Bill leaned into the touch before he detected the smell of the apple and stepped forward, nudging Magnus' hand that was wrapped around the fruit to take a bite. The young man let him, smiling in delight at the way the pony's teeth, that had once looked so impressive to him, worked fast around the apple, juice dripping down Magnus' fingers - that Bill would not fail to lick properly.

The pony Magnus had fallen in love with as soon as he'd set his eyes on him had aged and was going to turn twenty-six in August; save for his lustrous brown coat that had lost some of its sheen and his legs that stiffened more easily, Bill looked the same as he did ten years prior. Magnus had changed, however, he had grown and learned to ride bigger horses and yet, he still showered Bill with love.

In spite of the years gone by, the kind and patient pony remained his best friend, something he had never dared tell Raphael. Whenever he needed to vent and couldn't reach any of his human friends, he turned to his tiny friend on four legs, the one who would always listen without judging and who didn't know any other way to help than to blow lightly on Magnus' hair, warm breath tickling his neck. It was fine though, for he would always feel more relaxed after sharing some time with Bill and telling him about his days, his troubles and joys, his problems with the Lightwoods... Who, if they knew he spoke to his pony like this, would laugh their asses off. It would never make him stop, though.

"Up for a walk, Bill?" Magnus addressed the pony as he grabbed the halter that was hanging off a nail well above Bill's level, so that he couldn't hurt himself accidentally.

Bill bent his head to slip his nose through the halter on his own, which Magnus understood as a yes so off they went, leaving the stables at a slow pace to accommodate Bill's old legs. They headed for the forest nearby, trailing on the path they had grown used to follow over the years, walking between familiar trees and rocks.

In the forest lingered a smell of wet dirt after days and weeks of sun, a fresh and earthy scent brought by the mud, the soggy spots on the path and the mosses that seemed to rejoice and relish in the humid atmosphere. Large puddles punctuated the trail and Bill stopped from time to time to drink from these or to splash water around with a kick of his forelegs. All was quiet around them, birds not daring to come out to sing yet, fearing the next rain.

Thus, unafraid of disturbing the fauna, Magnus started to ramble on about the beginning of his day and the competition. Talking about it either with his parents, friends or pony (who was an excellent listener) often proved helpful, for the young man sometimes noticed a mistake that he had previously missed and then he could use the sudden epiphany to make progress faster.

Magnus and Bill quickly arrived in a clearing in the middle of the woods where the boy thought he could take off the halter to let his pony roam and graze freely for a while, but Magnus froze when he realised that someone was there already.

Someone with messy hair, dressed in jeans and flannel, keeping company to a black mare who didn't seem bothered in the least by the newcomers' arrival. Alec Lightwood had obviously had the same idea as Magnus - who didn't quite know how to feel about that. He hadn't noticed him though, too lost in the contemplation of his grazing mare, so maybe Magnus could backtrack silently and look for another grassy spot... Except that Bill didn't share his owner's hatred for the boy leaning against a tree in the clearing and he whinnied happily when he caught sight of the other horse. Alec jumped at the sudden noise and turned around, wide startled eyes locking with Magnus' narrowed ones.

"Traitor," he whispered to Bill, who didn't seem to care much as he lowered his head and started to eat.

Maybe Alec would ignore him, Magnus hoped as he resolutely stared at his pony: he didn't feel like dealing with that brat today, not when he could very well prance around and boast about his victory earlier that morning - and he would have the right to because, as much as it pained Magnus to admit it, Alec did in fact deserve the high ranking. But he didn't want to hear it, he didn't want to...

"Hi."

Magnus swivelled around in shock, both at being addressed in a normal way instead of hearing a swift _loser_ added at the end of the greeting, and at the tone of Alec's voice: he could swear his vexatious neighbour sounded shy. Was he sick? Or was it a trick? He stood alone with his horse and Jace was nowhere in sight, so was he playing nice just because his brother wouldn't be there to save his ass if things got a bit heated?

"Hey," Magnus answered in spite of his doubts, grunting a bit, and he couldn't help taunting the other boy a little. "Where's your other half?"

"My other... Jace, you mean?" Alec asked with a light chuckle that nearly made Magnus' eyes pop out of their sockets, "He's with Clary. This is their second date, can you believe it?"

Alec definitely had a fever. If he were in his right mind, he would never have greeted Magnus like he had, he wouldn't have _chuckled_ , he would have told him to fuck off instead of sharing his brother's love life with him and... Wait.

Clary and Jace were on their second date already?! Crap, Ragnor was right when he said the other day that he was certain they would hit it off and not stop after just one date. Magnus wouldn't budge on his opinion though, Clary was his friend and she deserved better than that boy. Maybe Jace had made it his priority in life to annoy Magnus in whatever way he could, though.

"Congratulations, by the way," Alec said after a heavy moment of silence, as if he couldn't stand the tension and absolutely needed to talk to Magnus in order to ease it down.

"Uh... What?" the latter blurted, too surprised to be congratulated on something by a Lightwood in the first place.

"Congratulations," Alec repeated on a soft tone, flashing him an almost hesitant smile. "For this morning? You... You were great out there."

Magnus' previous surprise turned to suspicion in the blink of an eye and he stayed quiet, waiting for the inevitable jibe that would follow. When it didn't, he growled:

"What are you playing at?"

He nearly punched himself: it would have been easy to answer Alec with a curt _you were great too_ and leave it a that but of course he had to open his mouth and express his frustration at not understanding the Lightwood's point; no doubt that managing to work him up would delight the other boy. Yet, Alec still looked genuine when he said:

"I'm not playing, I'm telling you the truth..."

"Right," Magnus sneered, "You won, just to remind you. I didn't."

"It doesn't mean you weren't good," Alec answered, shyly glancing at his mare and clearly confused as to why Magnus would not just accept his compliment. "I mean, yeah, I saw that you turned a bit too fast in the corner and your horse was unbalanced but it was fine and really, you were great, you..."

Alec shut up when Magnus raised his brows and he suddenly blushed when he realised that he'd been rambling. Trying to ignore the fact that Alec had apparently watched him during the competition and had paid him enough attention to spot that damn mistake and remember it when it was all over, Magnus took a few threatening steps toward the other to close most of the distance between them and he snarled:

"If I was so great, why are you pointing out these flaws? Under all the courtesies, are you actually trying to tell me that I suck?"

"No!" Alec exclaimed with wide eyes, "I'm not! I just... I just want to help..."

"Why?" Magnus asked again. "You hate me."

Alec's mouth snapped shut at the accusation and he sighed as he stared at Magnus, unable to say anything to defend himself. Magnus knew it, he knew the Lightwood boy couldn't actually mean what he had said about his performance during the horse show. He had observed him and paid extra attention to tiny mistakes just to throw them in Magnus' face later and make him feel like shit. But he wouldn't manage that: Jace had gotten a lesser score than him and he wasn't about to forget it.

"Can't I be nice?" Alec tried again after a few seconds, sounding almost desperate to make Magnus consider this new option - but he wasn't going to.

"You've never been nice to me," he shot back, even though he knew that wasn't completely true - their last encounter at the coffee shop had proved as much. "Why would you start now?"

Again, Alec looked like he didn't know what to say, what words to use, afraid of making Magnus even angrier. There was something in his eyes though, something screaming that he wanted to speak to him, apologise maybe, so that they would not part with hard feelings toward each other... Which was truly ironic, since they had been doing exactly that since forever.

"Two truths, one lie?" Alec suggested then.

Magnus blinked in surprise and immediately frowned: it wasn't the first time he was taken aback by Alec today and that fact was getting on his nerves. Really. He felt like he stood in front of a stranger who had nothing in common with the Alec Lightwood he thought he knew. He was talking to someone he didn't understand in the slightest and not getting why the other boy would ask to play the truth and lie game right now was just an adequate proof of that. He was confused, why would Alec...

"I like you, Jace is so in love with Clary it's gross and your pony looks ridiculously short," Alec blurted out without warning, speaking so fast he certainly had stopped breathing for a second.

That didn't help Magnus' hazy brain to understand what had just happened: in fact, he was only able to focus on the last part of Alec's hasty sentence - which, what?! There he was, freshly returned from fever-land, the Alec Lightwood he knew and abhorred.

"What?" Magnus eventually gave voice to his shocked thoughts. "Fuck you! I'll have you know Bill might be tiny, but he certainly has a bigger heart than you and your brother do together!"

"What?" Alec echoed faintly, looking a bit horrified, "No, I meant..."

"I don't care," Magnus interrupted him, "I'm out of here. Bill, come on!"

Either feeling how upset his human friend was or hearing in his voice that now wasn't the time anymore to keep grazing lazily, Bill's head snapped up and he trotted beside Magnus on the path, the both of them going back to where they had come from. The young man was fuming with anger and still, he glanced behind his shoulder once, only to witness Alec dropping in the wet grass with a dejected look on his face, before he buried it in the crook of his arms, atop his bent knees. Magnus scowled: it was too late for Alec to realise how hurtful his words had been...

Until Magnus finally realised what Alec had actually blurted and slowed down, both in his pace and his trail of thought. _Two truths and a lie_. Two true statements and one false, and what had Alec added after that? Magnus perfectly remembered the part about Bill being short and ridiculous, so it had to be the lie, right? Lightwood had grown around horses too, certainly he had to melt in front of such a cutie like Bill and didn't think what he had said about him... And Magnus had gone and yelled at him when he probably didn't even mean it and was just looking to hide two truths.

But what were those and why hide them in the first place? Alec had uttered some nonsense about Jace and Clary... being in love, was it? Did it qualify as a lie if Alec truly believed there was some - impossible - feeling of affection sparking between them? Probably not. Alright, so that made one truth. And Alec had also said...

Magnus abruptly stopped walking altogether and Bill eyed the tufts of grass along the path with interest again.

_I like you_.

Alec had said those words. They were... unexpected. Impossible. Unthinkable. Maybe he had made a mistake, maybe he'd been playing two lies and one truth, because it was unfathomable that Alec... liked him. _Him_ , Magnus Bane, who had never done anything to be liked by Alec Lightwood, ever. Goodness, they fought all the time! Well, he and Jace mostly, but Blondie's older brother was always there and... It didn't make sense. None of it. Maybe Magnus had misunderstood. There couldn't be a world in which Alec Lightwood liked Magnus Bane! He wouldn't have them fall in love with each other like some modern version of Romeo and Juliet, he didn't want to!

Just like he didn't want to think that if the other boy hadn't made a mistake and if Magnus had heard his words properly, then Alec had showed a lot of bravery as he confessed his feelings to the one person who hated him.

Which, for the record and as Magnus had previously decided on, could _not_ be. Could it? No. No, no, no. No. Alec didn't like him.

Magnus' confusion and denial about the situation lasted until well after he had dinner with his parents and he told himself not to think about it any longer. Or if he did, then he should consider that Alec had gotten his two truths wrong: there was no way he actually meant _that_ \- and no way for Magnus to properly deal with the bomb Alec had dropped on him.

That night, when he called Catarina to explain what had happened, seeking helpful advice and comfort, she laughed so hard that she fell off her mattress with a thud in the middle of her loud cackling.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Our boys seem to be getting nowhere... What could possibly get them closer, I wonder! Feel free to leave a comment with your thoughts and opinions! Until next time :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Sorry about the late update, I had planned on posting this earlier in the day but I had family over to celebrate my birthday and couldn't find the time to finish the chapter. I just did though, so here we go! I hope you'll like it ;)

  


Magnus didn't sleep well that night, what with the constant noise of the heavy rain hitting his windows and the echoes of both Alec's and Catarina's words replaying in his mind. _I like you_. Alec. _Maybe you should consider that he was saying the truth _. Cat, who had eventually stopped laughing on the phone and had taken his problem a bit more seriously. Catarina believed that Alec might have been completely honest; she was virtually always right and Magnus had no reason to doubt her on this specific topic but... No matter how much he tried to make sense of it, how hard he tried to look at the situation differently, he just didn't understand.__

____

__

How the heck could Alec say _I like you_ and never do anything to make Jace shut his trap? If you liked someone, weren't you supposed to support that person, help them to feel good, want them to be happy?

Magnus tortured himself about it throughout the morning, while he tried to solve the equations his math teacher had given his class. Needless to say, he didn't get far in his homework: the bright hazel eyes flashing through his mind kept distracting him. The same damned thoughts even plagued him during lunch and he frowned so much that his mom looked at him in concern and eventually asked:

"What's wrong, honey?"

"Nothing," he started before he caught sight of her raised brows and amended, "I mean, nothing is _wrong_ per se. I'm just... thinking."

"I can see that," Anna answered with a smile, "But you don't seem very happy."

"It's just..."

Magnus hesitated, a bit reluctant to involve his mother in this matter: she and Jimmy had never condoned his rivalry with the Lightwoods and had tried to get their son and the neighbours' closer to one another in the past - to no avail, obviously. She hadn't liked to see them fight, hadn't been able to stand seeing them make one another so miserable with their rude comments, so she had done everything she could to make it stop. Sadly, she wasn't in control of Jace's and Alec's mindset nor of Magnus' talent at snapping back at them and with time, she had decided to let her son deal with the problem on his own.

It wasn't going too well, obviously.

"What if..." Magnus slowly said, weighing his words to be sure not to let anything slip about Alec, "What if someone told you they like you but they don't act like it? Would you believe them?"

His mother blinked and took the time to swallow her vegetables and wash that bite down with a glass of water before she answered him, on the same careful tone.

"Everyone shows their love in different ways... Some people are shy, you know? But it depends on what you mean by saying they don't act like it: is this person being rude to you?"

There she was, the protective mother hen. Now, how to answer that question without making her worry about him even more and without her realising whom he was thinking of?

Most importantly, was Alec rude? Well, yes, he did stand by Jace's side all the damn time after all. He didn't object to Jace's snide comments, didn't do anything to stop Jace's behaviour, he didn't...

Jace. The cruel remarks, the bad behaviour, the ugly words thrown his way. They had all always been Jace's. Not Alec's. There was that. So maybe Alec didn't hate him as much as Jace did? Did he hate Alec as much as he did Jace? Yes? No?

Besides, Alec did try to make his brother shut up. Now that he knew about Alec's... strange, if they were even true, feelings for him, he was starting to realise that more than once, he had found some unexpected help in Alec, although it had been often ignored by both Jace and Magnus himself. He had wanted them to calm down at the coffee shop. He'd offered napkins to Magnus, who had stubbornly refused to take them. He'd tried to get his brother to apologise... Something Jace had obviously been opposed to and frankly, Magnus didn't blame him: he would have done the same. Still, Alec had been willing to step forward and had attempted to make the situation a tiny bit better.

Magnus hadn't listened that day, just like he hadn't listened in the forest, when Alec had bravely bared his heart to him. He should have known better, paid more attention: no one in their right mind would accuse Bill of being ridiculous so of course that statement was hiding something else, a more shocking truth... And what a shock indeed.

"They may be better than I thought," Magnus reluctantly admitted to his mother after a while of sullen consideration.

Maybe - but just maybe. He wasn't going to change his mind about Alec or to fall in love with him over the span of two minutes, not after everything that had happened between them - them and Jace. The dark-haired boy might have tried to help but it didn't excuse the years of standing by and watching while Magnus' heart broke upon not being accepted or while his fists were slowly loosening after a fight with Blondie in the schoolyard.

"Good," his mother said, glad to see that the one who liked her son wasn't to be directly considered a dangerous asshole, "Now you only have to decide whether or not that person is worth trying to find out if they're truly better than you think."

Did Magnus even want to know if Alec really had kindness inside him? He couldn't deny that he was intrigued by what he'd learned about him and by the gentle gestures he'd only now noticed. He doubted it would result in something truly life-changing but... It couldn't hurt to give Alec a chance. Only one though: Magnus may have a good heart but he was not a fool. One wrong word, one weird look or even one unpleasant thought and Alec could go to hell and stay there to rot. Magnus wouldn't care.

Also, giving him a chance didn't mean accepting to... Do just like Clary and go on a date with the guy. Magnus didn't like Alec, good boy in disguise or not, and he wasn't going to pretend in order to spare the Lightwood's feelings. He would have to blow him off... Gently, maybe, if he turned out to deserve Magnus' sympathy. If not... Well, at least Jace would finally have some good reason to come after him.

After his conversation with his mother, he tried not to think about it anymore. He really did, busying himself in order to keep his mind focused on something, anything else than Alec freaking Lightwood. Magnus helped his mom load the trunk of the car with the failing stall waterers she had to bring back to the store in town, where she would meet with his dad so they could go see some stallion show together.

He watched her leave with a small frown, glancing at the sky in worry: the rain didn't seem ready to stop yet and to make everything worse, the wind was starting to act up too. If it didn't get any better quickly, they could just as well prepare for a proper storm.

Magnus remembered his first storm in America, his first storm _period_ , as he had never experienced one in Indonesia - at least, he didn't think so... He had been terrified the first time, turning pale at the sight of lightning flashes cracking the sky open, crying as thunder rumbled over the mountains around them and echoed in the valley. Anna and Jimmy had allowed him to crawl in their bed that night, eyes red with tears and body shaking, and they had held his hands and hugged him, whispering how thunder was nothing but two clouds so happy to see each other that they greeted the other with boisterous laughter.

Magnus smiled in remembrance. That night was one of these moments when he had truly understood what it meant to have parents, to be protected, safe in someone's arms. One of his fondest memories.

The young man wasn't afraid of storms anymore now but he still glanced between the dark grey sky and the horses grazing in the meadows with concern etched on his face: he should get them inside, just in case... Besides, the rain was too strong and the fields would start to turn into muddy plains before long, which would do no good to the horses' legs. Yeah, they had to go back to the stables, they would feel more comfortable and warm there.

Magnus found Jeremiah and his brother Zachariah in the barn, counting the hay and straw bales to assess how long they could last, what with the current amount and considering how much each horse ate when kept in stalls - and they ate _a lot_. During spring and summer, most of the horses only ate the grass from the meadows but the mares who were about to foal were kept inside for close monitoring and they stood on a thicker bedding than the others, for their comfort and that of the foal when the right time came.

With Zachariah's and Jeremiah's help, Magnus transferred all the horses from the meadows to their stalls, not without difficulty though: some of them weren't too happy not to be allowed outside anymore.

"Come on, Malfoy!" Magnus scolded the cream gelding when he turned his ears backward and glared, not too keen on letting the boy put the halter on him. "Wait until you're soaking wet, then you'll want to get inside, trust me!"

Malfoy eventually relented, hurrying without warning when what Magnus feared happened all of a sudden: the first echoes of thunder and flashes of lightning. Still a bit far but he didn't doubt that the storm would quickly arrive upon them. Leaving Malfoy in his stall, he quickly toured the stables to make sure that every horse was safely inside and had enough hay for the evening and the night.

"You should go back home now," he suggested to the brothers afterwards, "before the storm really hits us."

"Yeah..." Zachariah agreed, glancing at the sky, "But will you be alright here on your own?"

"Don't worry, mom and dad should be back before nightfall, so I'm good."

It turned out that no, his parents wouldn't return that night at all, as he learned when his mother called, just as the evening begun.

"Honey," his mother apologised on the phone, "Your dad and I won't come back tonight, I'm sorry. Trees have fallen on the road and we can't leave town yet, plus with the storm..."

"It's okay, mom," Magnus told her, even though it really wasn't: what if he had a problem with one of the horses and couldn't deal with it himself? "Do you have a place to sleep?"

"Yes, a couple of friends offered their guestroom. We'll come back tomorrow morning, as soon as we can, and..."

"Mom," Magnus scolded her gently, rolling his eyes, "Don't be in such a hurry, it's fine. Maybe the storm won't stop tomorrow and then, I don't want you to drive if it's not safe yet. I'll be fine."

He really hoped he would be though. Without Jem and Zach... He had experience with the horses of course and he could deal with most situations while staying calm. But being alone to handle more than twenty horses wasn't easy and he would keep his fingers crossed and pray that no major problem would come up. This was going to be a long, long night.

Magnus changed in his pyjamas while listening to the song of the rain and the wind, jumping whenever he caught sight of the lightning as it tore the sky in half. He made himself a light dinner, too nervous to cook something really elaborate - that he would probably burn anyway - and tried to finish his math homework. Even though he wasn't thinking about Alec anymore, he wasn't very productive: his attention was mostly focused on the horses in the stables, straining to hear the slightest whinny or neigh that would mean trouble.

The boy only realised that he had fallen asleep and dropped his pen when he awoke with a start, heart beating like crazy. He noticed several things at the same time: the digits on the screen of his phone showed that it was past eleven already, it was still raining outside and lastly, the alarm of the foal monitor was blaring in his ears.

Foal monitor. Shit, Sapphire!

Magnus didn't even take the time to put on a sweater: he only grabbed his phone and then he was out, storming inside the stables to see Sapphire. She had a large belt around her to detect her movements as well as the contractions of her belly, and the blaring alarm could only mean one thing: the foal was coming.

He ran between the two lines of stalls, startling Horcrux who was half-asleep, and he only briefly marvelled at the horses' nightlife: he heard Philadelphia and Baloo argue and whinny at each other from above the wall that separated them and caught the rumbling of Cherry's stomach, then the sound of Biscuit messing around with the straw. He quickly refocused on Sapphire though and he slowed down, dreading to scare her if he arrived too fast.

The mare was restless, pawing the bedding and switching her tail nervously. She looked at Magnus with wide eyes as he entered her stall, cooing at her as he usually did so that she would be reassured, and she allowed him to pat her neck. His hand came back a bit sticky with sweat and he didn't think twice before wiping his palm on his pyjamas, already concerned with another matter: Sapphire's udder was swollen and two small pearls of white milk were slowly beading. The foal would be there soon enough.

Goodness.

Magnus' heart skipped a beat and he suddenly panicked: the foal was coming and he was alone. He didn't know how to do this! His parents were stuck in town for the night, Jeremiah and Zachariah had gone home, so what should he do? Where to even begin? He had never helped a mare give birth before, he'd always let his father and Valentine do it, too scared of doing something wrong and... Valentine, of course! Magnus only needed to call him, he would come and help, that was what vets _did_! Panic turned him into such an idiot!

Still talking sweet but nervous nonsense to Sapphire, not that she minded, the young man quickly unlocked his phone and searched in his contacts for Doctor Morgenstern's number, dialling as soon as he found it and praying that the man would answer, only to be severely disappointed when a piercing beep resounded in his ear.

 _No signal_.

"Damned storm!" Magnus muttered under his breath, doing his best to remain calm and quiet for his mare's sake.

He couldn't handle this alone. What if the foal wasn't healthy and Magnus didn't notice it before it was too late? What if something was wrong with Sapphire after the foaling? What if she rejected her offspring or didn't have enough milk? He needed someone to help him, tell him how to proceed, but he didn't know who could do that when he couldn't even make a phone call to alert them in the first place! Magnus lived in the middle of the valley with horses as neighbours and...

Shit, Magnus truly was an idiot. Walking out of the stall as quickly as he had entered it, the boy started to run again, this time in the opposite direction; he crossed the yard, ran on the path that led to the road - in nothing but his slippers and his pyjamas - and he hurried to the neighbouring ranch under the rain, hoping that Robert Lightwood was home.

As he rang the bell, he prayed that Robert would be the one to open the door, not someone else, not... Jace, for example. He was certain Blondie would laugh at him and call him a coward for not daring to help Sapphire on his own. Eventually, the door opened and it was worse than everything Magnus could have imagined: he found himself face to face with Alec, who looked a bit sleepy and wasn't wearing anything besides his pyjamas pants. Magnus did _not_ look at his arms or his perfect chest: he had more pressing matters to care about.

"Magnus?" came Alec's shocked voice.

The Lightwood boy had suddenly realised who stood in front of him, apparently, and he crossed his arms against his chest defensively, growing a bit self-conscious in his state of half-nakedness. Or maybe he was scared of what Magnus had come to say to him, given that their last encounter had not ended in the best of circumstances... Not to mention the earth-shattering revelation Alec had made then.

"Is your dad home?" Magnus asked without preamble, probably looking every bit as distressed as he felt.

"No," Alec answered with a curious tilt of his head, "He's stuck in town with mom, he took her to the restaurant to... You know, try and make up."

"Your sister?" he prompted, growing a bit desperate when Alec shook his head.

"She and Jace went to a party," he explained with an awkward and hesitant smile, "And since I don't really like parties, I stayed home to babysit Max... Magnus, what's wrong?"

The young man halted, biting his lower lip as he tried not to pay attention to the way Alec had said his name, which was probably the first time ever: they didn't talk much usually and Jace called him _Bane_ , not _Magnus_. Now was not the time though so he refocused to ask for help. Even though it didn't please him to depend on Alec, Magnus knew he could not handle Sapphire's foaling on his own... She was more important than whatever beef he might have with the Lightwood boys. Besides, hadn't he agreed with himself on giving Alec a chance?

"I'm home alone," he explained in few words and then quickly added, before Alec could taunt him for being scared of the storm while all on his own, "And one of our mares is foaling. I need help: I can't get in touch with our vet and I've never done this before, I..."

"I can do it," Alec interrupted him gently, raising his hand as if he wanted to squeeze Magnus' shoulder but dropping it as soon as he noticed his spontaneous gesture.

Magnus wondered if he did this with his siblings. If he held them to bring them comfort, if he hugged them when times got rough. He blinked.

"You'll help me?" he asked with wide eyes.

"Of course," Alec gently told him, with a smile that looked half-tender and half-sad to think that Magnus could be so surprised by his positive answer. "Lead the way."

And just like that, half-nakedness and all, Alec stepped out of his house and closed the door behind him, looking expectantly at Magnus, who didn't need to be told twice: he hurried back to his own ranch, Alec in tow, babbling to him about Sapphire's condition so that the other boy knew at what stage of her foaling she was.

When they entered Sapphire's stall, the mare was lying down and Magnus kneeled to be at her level and introduce her to the stranger in his company.

"This is Alec," he whispered to her, soothing the mare with the soft tone of his voice and not caring if Alec thought him mad, "He's going to help you tonight, alright?"

To his surprise, the other boy kneeled in the straw by his side and extended his arm, enabling Sapphire to sniff at his hand before snorting her acceptance.

"Everything will be fine," Alec said with a tiny smile.

Magnus couldn't decide whether he was talking to him or to Sapphire and couldn't wonder any longer: Alec and he had to quickly jump on their feet and take a few steps back, for the mare suddenly stood up.

"It's okay," Alec told him when he saw that Magnus was a bit spooked, "She might pace a little, lie down, stand up, lie down again... It's normal."

Magnus nodded, knowing that he had no other choice than to trust Alec anyway: who else would tell him what to do? So he also obeyed when the other boy suggested that they should leave the stall and let Sapphire be for a moment instead of crowding her. Magnus acknowledged the wisdom in his statement and they peered at her from outside the stall, remaining absolutely quiet. It wasn't an easy, amiable silence but rather one filled with tension: it felt like Alec expected to be yelled at. And maybe Magnus could understand why: because of their last meeting or their shared years of being dicks to each other, or perhaps Alec's last confession... You could pick either one.

Fortunately, it soon became obvious that they would not discuss any of it: Sapphire's water suddenly broke and her soft whine made them pay attention and keep a watchful eye on her, both ready to intervene at any moment - well, Alec was. Magnus was just going to freak out and try to follow the Lightwood's every move.

And Magnus would never have believed that he would think that way but thank all the gods that Alec was there! He obviously knew what he was doing and when it became clear that Sapphire was struggling a bit too much to be normal, he was quick to react. The forelegs of the foal were already visible through the amniotic sac, as well as the tip of its nose since its neck was stretched along its legs - and that at least was the normal position, Magnus knew that - but the foal seemed to be stuck.

"Was the stallion much bigger than her?" Alec asked after a moment, rubbing Sapphire's belly with soothing caresses that she looked to be enjoying, her sweaty body relaxing somewhat as she lay down a bit more comfortably. "The foal might be a bit too large."

"Yeah," Magnus squeaked, glancing from the foal to Sapphire's wide eyes, "Just a little. We didn't plan on having her and Pilgrim mate, she just... broke free."

Alec chuckled, a strange sound to hear in this situation, and Magnus managed to relax at that, just like Sapphire under the boy's hands. And, really, wasn't that ridiculous?

He gulped when Alec gently prodded at the foal, starting a slow and careful motion of pulling to help Sapphire push.

"Can you hold her hind legs still?" Alec asked, "I don't want her kicking me."

Magnus did, praising Sapphire when she pushed some more and managed to get her foal's shoulders out of her before taking a break, straining to raise her neck and watch what was happening behind her.

"You're almost there, Sapphire," he whispered, "Come on, now..."

With a sigh that almost broke Magnus' heart, the mare pushed and pushed and pushed and... It happened so fast and yet so slow, each second of Sapphire's labour excruciatingly painful to watch for Magnus, who kept wondering if everything was normal, if the foal was breathing properly and... God, what if it wasn't? No, no, no, everything was fine, Alec had said so, all was...

"Good girl!" Alec exclaimed all of a sudden, sounding so joyous that Magnus couldn't help but smile and then, yes, there she was, a cute if sticky and bloody little filly, all wet and gangly, shaking her tiny head as she landed on the bedding of the stall, pushing herself through the white amniotic sac with a flutter of her long and thin limbs.

"Holy crap," Magnus whispered as he stared at her, barely noticing the slow tears running down his cheeks.

"She's alright," Alec reassured him, wiping his bloody hands on his pants, "Both of them, they're fine. You did well, Magnus."

He wanted to protest, tell the boy that he hadn't done anything, that the successful foaling was all on _him_ and Sapphire, but he couldn't find it in himself to argue.

"Thank you," he said instead with a sniffle. "Thank you so much..."

"You're welcome," Alec laughed a bit, eyes shining and merry in spite of his obvious exhaustion.

The boys stepped back to give the new mother and her baby some intimacy and time for themselves, and they collapsed in a corner of the stall while Sapphire lay down flat on the straw and rested for a few minutes. Magnus didn't even notice that his hand flew to Alec's arm and held onto him when Sapphire finally stood up to take a look at her baby and clean her with long, gentle licks. He did realise, however, that Alec was still half-naked and wouldn't feel too warm anymore after the adrenaline induced by the foaling wore off, so he quietly escaped to the house to grab a sweater and a blanket, offering the former to the dark-haired boy and wrapping the latter around them both.

If he took two seconds to think about what the hell he was doing, Magnus would certainly believe that he had become crazy. As it was though, it felt like the most natural thing to do after helping Sapphire to give birth to her foal. He would have the time to freak out in the morning.

"I'll stay with you until she gets up," Alec whispered after a little while. "To see if she's healthy..."

Magnus nodded absently, too focused on the scene unfolding under his eyes. The tiny horse was pushing on her forelegs, then on her hind feet, trying to get up and failing only to try again, and there was so much life and energy in her movements for such a little being who had arrived in this world barely fifteen minutes prior... Magnus was in awe.

He wasn't ashamed to admit that he cried again when the filly finally managed to stand on her four skinny legs and took a few hesitant steps, guided to her mother's udder by gentle nose bumps on her behind. He was a bit more ashamed when Alec lifted his hand, shaky with hesitation, to wipe a few tears away - but when he saw the gentleness and no judgement in the boy's eyes, he thought that perhaps it was okay.

He would be awfully ashamed the next morning though, once he'd realise that he had fallen asleep on Alec's shoulder as they watched Sapphire's baby drink her first milk.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed this chapter ^^ Until next time!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Life is getting a bit hectic over here so I apologise if this chapter and the future ones take a bit more time to come than usual, I'm trying to juggle my job with my doctorate, my social life (ahem), my stories and my horse and I have to prioritise a little bit... My horse being number one, since he's a living being and actually needs me :) I'll do my best to keep regular updates though but bear with me if they are a few days late ^^ Enjoy this chapter!

  


Magnus was asleep. He felt good, comfy, his head supported by something a bit firm and definitively warm - ten out of ten, would recommend. He didn't want to wake up, no matter how loudly his stomach was rumbling, because surely his hunger could be sated later; this amazing source of warmth, however, might as well be gone as soon as he opened his eyes... So he did not.

He imagined that this sensation of pure cosiness and wellbeing was close to what one must feel when slowly waking up in the arms of a lover on a golden morning and really, Magnus didn't want to let go of it. He snuggled into to the marvellous warmth just a bit more, heaving a sigh of contentment at the thought that the duvet in his bed had never felt so snug before.

Except that Magnus wasn't in his bed, as he realised when a warm breath ticked his nose: nobody slept with him in his bedroom, so he couldn't be there. But then... Where was he, exactly? Now would certainly have been a good time to open his eyes and jolt awake, yet he didn't. He was not sure that he wanted to know where he was and what had happened to him.

The warm breath was still there and it smelled funny too, a smell that Magnus knew but couldn't identify yet, and he had just decided to not care about it and go back to sleep while he could, when something _licked_ him.

Magnus' eyelids fluttered open. Oddly, he didn't even scream, didn't jump in fright, he merely opened his eyes wide - a mistake, for the bright light of the room hurt his pupils a little. He blinked, half-blinded and half-surprised: the licking was still going on. When he could finally take in his surroundings without feeling like he was going to cry from too much brightness, Magnus nearly burst out laughing.

He was sitting in the straw and Sapphire's filly had started her discovery of her stall, stumbling on her long legs toward Magnus to make his acquaintance - by licking his cheek. He chuckled, startling her in the process, but she quickly recovered and came for his hair instead, sniffing it with curiosity. _Please_ , Magnus thought, _don't try to eat my hair, don't.._.

Suddenly, the firm and warm something that his head had been resting upon _moved_ , shaking with low laughter, and Magnus finally thought of turning to his right instead of only focusing on the stall and the horses.

Holy crap.

Alec.

Alec Lightwood, sitting by his side and leaning his back against the wall, smiling at him as he wore Magnus' red sweater, wrapped in one half of the blanket while the other was draped over Magnus' own shoulders. He had forgotten about that detail, he hadn't remembered that Alec had stayed... Oh. Shit. Had he really... slept on the boy's shoulder? Goodness, there went his reputation! One did not sleep with the enemy! Well, by _sleeping with_ , he didn't mean... And Alec wasn't the enemy per se, he wasn't, he was just... What? Stop thinking, Magnus!

"Hi?" Alec tentatively greeted him, having obviously witnessed the flutter of emotions across Magnus' face and not too sure what to make of it.

"Hi," he squeaked, blushing furiously - at his own intonation of course, not at the situation!

"Did you sleep well?" Alec asked, still hesitant in his question and his smile.

Magnus didn't know what to answer... Or, to be more truthful, he wasn't sure that he wanted to. Because if he had to be honest, then yes, he had slept well. Amazingly well, even: he had not noticed falling asleep nor collapsing on the other boy's shoulder, which maybe he could blame on the fatigue after Sapphire's foaling but... How to justify his easy rest? He hadn't even heard the storm outside, when two nights before he had slept fitfully, disturbed by the rain and the wind.

Magnus refused to think that his good night of sleep had anything to do with Alec's presence. That would be preposterous.

"I did," Magnus settled on grumbling, struggling a little to free himself from the blanket that covered him. "And you?"

"Yeah," Alec answered, "Until the little one decided to lick my nose."

Magnus couldn't help but chuckle at that, picturing the scene in his mind, but his laughter died down abruptly when he noticed the effect it had on Alec: the boy's whole face lit up with hope upon realising he'd made him laugh, obviously taking it as progress, and Magnus was suddenly reminded of their attempted conversation in the forest, of Alec's _feelings_. He could not make him hope anymore. It would be cruel and Alec had been kind to him... He could not lead him on, even unintentionally.

"I have to feed the horses," Magnus said, squirming out of the blanket's hold and standing up, eyes shifting back and forth between Sapphire and the bedding of the stall, anything not to stare at the other boy.

"Do you need any help?"

Why? Why did Alec have to be so thoughtful? If this kept on going, Magnus would eventually regret the time he yelled at the Lightwood without thinking twice: that, at least, was easier to deal with than this, the other boy's unrequited feelings that he could not return.

"N... No," Magnus stammered, "But thanks. Zach and Jem will be there soon, I think, so I'm good. Maybe you should go home? Shower, eat something?"

Alec's face fell, understanding the words as the awkward dismissal that they were. He looked down for a second, no doubt composing himself in order not to show how pained it made him, but when he lifted his head and locked eyes with Magnus again, his hazel eyes still seemed sad.

"All right," he whispered, standing up as well, carefully folding the blanket in half to busy his hands, "I'll go... The storm is over, I think, I should check on our own horses. And prepare Max's breakfast: he sleeps like the dead and once he's awake... Can't get in a good mood without food."

Magnus nodded, feeling more awkward than ever as he stood there and witnessed Alec's aching heart. He had never realised before that he could hold such power on someone... Camille had, on him, and he knew how painful it could get when someone broke your heart but... Camille and him had actually dated and then, ended badly, while Alec liked him and had never even started anything with him. Magnus wondered then, if Alec felt like he had when he had found Camille kissing another boy, or worse. The thought of this possibility didn't sit well with him.

He had planned on staying inside Sapphire's stall while Alec left in order not to crowd him and to give him his space but then, he heard the engine of a car and immediately recognised it: his mother's. He was too eager to see her to wait for Alec to be gone, so he clomped after the other boy to walk out of the stables - the sky was still grey but at least it wasn't raining anymore - and sure enough, his parents were both there, getting out of the car.

"Alec?" Anna said with surprise as soon as she saw him, before she smiled and added, "What are you doing here?"

_With Magnus no less_ remained unsaid but it was clear that she was wondering what had happened to get them so close all of a sudden, what with her eyes glancing from one boy to the other.

"He spent the night," Magnus said, before his father's raised eyebrows made him realise what that peculiar sentence sounded like, and he hurried to explain. "Alec helped Sapphire to foal."

"She foaled?!" Jimmy exclaimed with widening eyes, "Did everything go well?"

"Yes, sir," Alec answered with a firm nod that made Jimmy relax a little, "She had a filly, a really beautiful and curious one."

"I tried to call Valentine but there was no signal because of the storm," Magnus added, keen on making the reason for the Lightwood's presence as clear and unambiguous as possible, "So I asked Alec for help..."

"Thank you so much, Alec!" Anna said with gratitude in her voice, stepping forward to hold the boy's hands in her own. "Why don't you stay for breakfast? I'm sure the night was long and tiring, Magnus and you must be famished!"

He was, Magnus realised when his stomach grumbled as soon as his mother brought his attention to his empty belly, and Alec probably felt the same way, except that he glanced at Magnus and promptly shook his head.

"I'm alright, thank you," he mumbled a bit shyly, "I should really go home now, Max must be wondering where I've run off to and my parents should be back soon. Thanks for the offer, though."

Alec waved vaguely at the Bane family, so clearly uncomfortable that it was painful to watch, and the boy walked away at a brisk pace, almost as if he was running away. Maybe he was, Magnus thought with sudden sadness: he was aware that he had not been the most polite and kind when he'd suggested that Alec went home... So maybe it wasn't that surprising that Alec would not dare to stay, even though Anna had invited him to, for fear of angering Magnus.

Great. Now Magnus felt like an ass: Alec hadn't actually done anything to deserve such an attitude, quite the contrary, even.

If Magnus suddenly surged forward and called Alec's name to make him feel better or to redeem himself, he couldn't quite say - but he did so anyway.

"Alec!" he yelled, running toward the boy, "Wait!"

The boy froze as soon as he heard Magnus' voice, stopping right on the edge of the road and seconds away from going back home. He stopped and yet he didn't wheel around, his back stubbornly turned on Magnus, who wondered if Alec was hiding from him, maybe keeping bitter tears of frustration and heartbreak out of sight. Magnus had, after all, sort of made him understand that he didn't really want him around... But he wasn't so sure about that anymore: he had found out that Alec wasn't like Jace, wasn't even like he had pictured him to be in his mind; he was much more than that and Magnus didn't know what to do with this knowledge. There had been too much hurt in the past to make it all vanish but... It wasn't all there was to Alec, to them. He didn't know how to act around the Lightwood boy anymore.

Alec and he had helped a new life to come into this world, something fragile and beautiful that had joined them for one night in a raw, unalterable moment of emotion. They would not pretend it hadn't happened. Magnus himself wouldn't. Perhaps it was time that he finally took the first step toward Alec.

"If you want..." he started, a bit hesitant since he was speaking to Alec's back instead of seeing his face, "If you like, you could come back to see Sapphire and her baby. I... I think Sapphire liked you?"

He added the last part on a questioning tone, making it sound as if Alec should come by not for Magnus' sake but for the mare's own happiness. Sapphire did like the boy, that much was true. Still, Magnus knew perfectly well why he had involved her in this: he was not ready to admit that he had enjoyed watching Alec handle her, had liked the way he had talked to the mare and comforted her, praised and encouraged her. His behaviour had revealed a gentle soul and that, Magnus could trust: one could not lie around horses. Heart beating too fast for something as stupid as this, Magnus waited for Alec's answer, not certain that he would even get one, and he unconsciously relaxed when the other boy turned around to face him. That had to mean something.

"I... I'd love to," Alec stammered, surprised but glad for the invitation. "Thank you, Magnus."

"Don't thank me," the latter muttered, looking at his feet as his own name coming from Alec's mouth pleasantly rang in his ears, "I don't think I would have managed without you. If you hadn't been there, Sapphire could have..."

"But I was there," Alec interrupted him before he could finish, and his cheeks took on a pink hue. "I'm always going to be there for you, Magnus, you should know that. I'm aware that many things stand between us but you have to understand that I was telling you the truth, the other day, when I said that I liked you. I..."

"I understood what you meant," Magnus said slowly, a strange lump rising in his throat as he watched Alec's lips curl in a sad smile, "But... Alec, I don't..."

"I know," the boy whispered, shifty eyes avoiding Magnus' gaze, "I know. I guess I shouldn't have expected anything else."

He sighed then, a sigh heavy with resigned acceptance, and he slowly looked at Magnus once more.

"Thanks for the invitation. I might swing by in the afternoon... To see the filly."

Magnus nodded and stared at Alec's retreating back as he left the Bane's property, still clad in the sweater he had given to him during the night. He was quick to turn away though, upset by the forlorn figure walking home, and he met his parents in the stables, where he found them peeking inside Sapphire's stall to watch her and her baby.

"Glad to see you and Alec didn't murder each other overnight," Jimmy joked when he saw his son, then he looked back inside the stall. "You two did a great job."

"Alec's doing," Magnus corrected, "I did nothing."

His father smiled, appreciating his son's honesty, and he asked:

"So, are you two... friends?"

"No," Magnus scowled, immediately on the defensive, especially when he caught sight of the knowing gleam and sudden understanding in his mother's eyes.

"Is he the one you said liked you but didn't show it?" she enquired with kind but sharp and thus annoying curiosity - Magnus didn't want to talk about it, especially since his mother was right.

"No," he repeated, as stubborn as a mule, and sought to switch to another topic - or better yet, to not speak at all. "I'll feed the horses."

It didn't fool his parents though and when he came back with a barrow filled to the brim with fresh hay for the horses' morning meal, his mother helped him to divide it between the five first stalls and walked back to the barn with him in order to refill the barrow.

"Alec is a nice boy," she said without preamble, "I know you have a lot of history and I'm not telling you to give him a chance if you don't want to but... If you do, you have to know that neither your father nor I would be against it. As long as you're happy."

"Mom," Magnus whined, "I don't want to talk about it. And we're not even friends!"

"Well," she shrugged, "it's up to you to change that, isn't it?"

Damn. Mothers were _always_ right.

Even so, the boy decided not to think about that option too much - and Magnus was great at ignoring his problems and procrastinating when it was time to look for solutions that he didn't want to find. Luckily for him, he had plenty of other matters to concern himself with: he still had his homework to do, although he was thinking of suggesting to his friends that they met up and got it over with together, since it would be way easier and funnier, and if the weather allowed it, he would love to go outside for a ride with Horcrux in the forest, maybe explore new paths and keep his mind off maddening things...

First though, he had to help his parents, along with Jeremiah and Zachariah, to deal with the uprooted tree they discovered in the horses' pasture when they checked the ranch for damages. The wind had proved too strong for the old tree and Magnus was glad that he and the brothers had taken all the horses inside before it finally crashed down: some of its heavy branches had collapsed on the fence, shattering part of it in several pieces, and the boy didn't want to think about what could have happened if any of their horses had run away in the stormy night.

Sawing the tree branches and fixing the fence as best as they could took up the bigger part of their morning, only interrupted by a quick lunch in the stables when it started raining again - nothing like the previous day though. Even the wind had subdued and Magnus believed it was safe to think that the worst was behind them.

He had nearly forgotten that he had told Alec to come back sometime, until the young man haltingly entered the stables in the middle of the afternoon, holding his little brother's hand in his own. Whether Max had wanted to see Sapphire's baby or Alec had not wanted to come alone, Magnus could not say - and he didn't ask. He wasn't _that_ much of an asshole.

"Hey," he greeted the two boys, walking out of Malfoy's stall where he had been massaging the gelding's legs until then. "You're back."

"You... You said I could?" Alec reminded him with some hesitation, maybe mistaking Magnus' tone for annoyance or worse, anger.

"Yes, of course," Magnus hurried to explain himself, "I just... I didn't know when you'd be back. It's fine though, don't worry."

Clearing his throat with awkwardness, the young man decided to look at Max - way easier than to lock eyes with the boy's big brother, especially when he feared the emotions he could see swimming in those hazel orbs: longing, mostly.

"You want to see the filly?" Magnus asked the little boy with slightly forced cheerfulness.

"Yes!" Max exclaimed with a huge grin revealing a missing tooth, before his brother gently nudged him and he added, "Please, Magnus."

"Follow me!"

Magnus led the boy toward Sapphire's stall and turned to him with a finger in front of his own lips to signify how important it was to be quiet, knowing far too well that children could be loud in their excitement, and Max nodded as he put his own index against his mouth. Magnus opened the stall with a smile and allowed the boy and his brother inside, silently admiring the half-asleep filly lying in the straw beside her mother.

Now that she was dry and not all wet and bloody from her birth, her colour appeared more clearly: Pilgrim's dapple grey coat had obviously passed on to his daughter, who didn't show the round spots quite yet but already had the same dark grey hair that would lighten and reveal the dapples as she grew up.

He glanced at Alec while both Lightwoods were looking at the horses with adoring smiles, and he bit his lips. He felt guilty for hurting the other boy earlier, even though Magnus knew he could not force himself to change his own feelings. He didn't like Alec _that way_. To be brutally honest, he wasn't even sure to like him at all, although he had to admit that he didn't wish to throw his fist into Alec's eye anymore either - he would reserve that for Jace. So, where did that leave them? On the brink of awkward friendship, toeing the line of a lifetime of hate? It didn't sound too good, did it?

"Have you already found a name for her?" Alec asked then, shaking Magnus out of his thoughts.

The other teen wasn't even looking at him, extra careful to keep his eyes on Max as the young boy ventured closer to the horses, constantly checking Sapphire's reaction to see if she would allow him by her and her filly's side. The mare was staring at him with vigilant eyes but her ears were relaxed, slightly stooping even, so she had to be fine with this little visitor.

"No," Magnus whispered, looking at the younger Lightwood as well, and he didn't think before he blurted out, "Would you like to name her?"

Alec was so surprised that he turned to Magnus at once, shock written all over his face - and how could Magnus have missed the fact that Alec liked him? He was so easy to read, wearing his emotions like a knight bearing a banner for his lord, clear and obvious to everyone, everyone but Magnus. And though he could read Alec's face like an open book, understanding his heart seemed far more complicated.

"Name her?" Alec repeated, incredulous and unaware of the other boy's thoughts - thankfully! "I... I can't! She's yours..."

"She wouldn't be there if it weren't for you," Magnus argued, without really knowing why and feeling like he couldn't even understand himself anymore. "So... I thought maybe you could give her a name."

"That's..." Alec trailed off, still shocked by the delicate attention of his not-quite-friend-and-not-quite-enemy, as shocked as Magnus himself felt. "That's... really nice. Thank you. But... Are you sure...?"

"Yes," the young man answered, surprised to find that he meant it.

Alec blinked a few times, apparently struggling to process the fact that Magnus would bestow him with a mission as important as to name this newborn horse, and Magnus hoped but too late that he wasn't sending mixed signals to the other young man.

"Thank you," Alec said before Magnus could wonder about it any longer. "I'll... I'll try to find a good name for her. I never thought you would..."

"Well," the other interrupted him, a bit embarrassed to be on the receiving end of Alec's gratitude. "It would seem that some things change, don't they? I had never realised before that you were not a conceited bastard like I thought, so..."

Shit. Was that too much? Too passive-aggressive, perhaps? Magnus never managed to know, for Alec's reaction was as unexpected as their whole blooming relationship that neither of them could define just yet: the young man threw his head back and laughed, eyes crinkling at the corners of his eyelids in a way that should _not_ look so endearing.

"Not a conceited bastard," Alec repeated with a chuckle, both disbelieving and amused. "I think I can work with that."

Magnus really shouldn't be smiling, and yet... And yet.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's something there that wasn't there before... Hehehe~ Thank you for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I'm so sorry about the delayed chapter, I went to Rome with my students last week and I had tons of work to do so that everything would be well prepared and organised. I'm back though and I hope you will enjoy this chapter! :)

  


"Apple pie?"

"No."

"Galaxy?"

"No."

"Star?"

"Don't you have something a bit more original?" Magnus grumbled, "I swear, it sounds like you never named a horse in your life before."

"Well, excuse you," Alec shot back, crossing his arms against his chest a bit defensively, but without heat - to be honest, he looked a bit embarrassed. "You refused all my most original names! And that was one hour ago!"

Had it been so long already? Had they really just spent a full hour discussing names for Sapphire's filly while sitting in her stall, and without driving each other mad? Whoa. Magnus was impressed. Truly. He hadn't seen it coming: it was one thing to tolerate each other's presence for the greater good, namely the mare's foaling and then Max's visit, but managing to do the same the next day while in each other's company only... And they _bantered_ , something he had never thought they would do - goodness, they were not becoming friends, were they?!

... They were, weren't they? Magnus was the only one to blame for it: after all, he had suggested that Alec found a name for the filly, not the other way around, so of course the Lightwood boy had to come back at some point to share his ideas with him. Worst of all, Magnus was enjoying it: he didn't _love_ it but still, he liked it enough to let a full hour pass without his knowledge.

"What's the name of your horse?" Alec asked then, his hazel gaze locking with Magnus' eyes as he tried to rekindle the conversation, maybe misunderstanding his silent thinking for anger. "The one you rode for the competition? I want to give this one a good name, one you'll like, so maybe if you tell me a few of your horses' names, I'll get inspired..."

Magnus blushed a little at the question, remembering Ragnor's taunts about Horcrux - but he wouldn't take shit from someone who wanted to name a foal _Ragnor Junior_. Besides, who knew what the name of Alec's mare was? Perhaps it was something ridiculous that would not make him feel too much like an idiot.

"Horcrux is his name," he answered, ready to glare at the boy at the slightest hint of laughter. "Then there's Malfoy."

"From _Harry Potter_?" Alec wondered aloud, smiling.

"Don't judge me," Magnus warned him, "I grew up with the books."

"I'm not judging, I promise," came Alec's answer, still with that smile that Magnus quickly understood was not a sign of mockery but a default reaction whenever the boy found out something new about him.

Alec had it really bad for him, didn't he? Magnus hadn't wanted to see it at first, full of disbelief, but the teenager's feelings seemed genuine and... It worried him. Alec had turned out not to be a dick so he, too, was trying to not be an asshole while not acting around him in an overfriendly way either. He might have implied the previous day that he would never return Alec's affection and yet, the boy was still there, next to him, doing his best to make their weird truce last as long as possible and at the same time, he wasn't forcing himself onto Magnus. He respected his feelings, while Magnus tried to do the same, keeping his distance so that he wouldn't raise Alec's hopes in vain. Managing a sort-of-normal relationship was a good start already.

"I'm not judging you," Alec repeated to check that Magnus had understood as much, "I can't really do that, my mare's named Eowyn."

Magnus' brows furrowed as he tried to remember where he had heard that name before, until it clicked. Well, they were both nerds, weren't they?

"As in Eowyn from _The Lord of the Rings_?" he asked, unable to fight a tiny smirk.

"Yes," Alec answered with a nonchalant shrug, even though he was blushing a bit, and he threw Magnus' previous words back in his face. "Don't judge me."

He chuckled, thinking against all common sense that they matched, what with their shared passion and enthusiasm about a book - not that he would ever let Alec know that, poor boy, he would have a mini heart-attack.

"Do you think you could find an Elvish name for her?" Magnus suddenly asked, pointing at the filly. "Maybe there's one that would suit her."

Magnus tried not to pay attention to the relief that briefly flashed across the other boy's face. Had he truly been that scared of being made fun of for the name he had given to his horse, even knowing that Magnus himself had named his own after the Harry Potter books? Obviously, yes. And he couldn't help but wonder, although it really shouldn't concern him... Had Alec been taunted before for it? The thought made Magnus frown: no one should be laughed at for loving something.

"I don't know if you'll like Elvish names," Alec said after a while, his left hand fumbling with his right sleeve in a bit of a self-conscious gesture, "But... There's _Ilmarë_ , maybe?"

" _Il_... _marë_?" Magnus repeated, trying out the strange name, "What does that mean? Does it even mean anything?"

Alec nodded, a shy smile once again appearing on his lips - could he stop doing that? Magnus couldn't just go and start thinking that he looked cute when he smiled that way. It wouldn't do. Neither would the fact that he found Alec quite attractive and that, combined to his smile and gentle voice, was dangerous territory. He had a reputation to uphold!

"It means _Starlight_ ," Alec explained, before his eyes widened in sudden panic, "I know you think _Star_ is unoriginal but _Ilmarë_ has the merit of being in another language and besides, your filly is a dapple grey and I really think her coat will look like tiny constellations later so maybe this isn't such a bad idea, I mean..."

"Alec," Magnus stopped him, this close to actually cover the boy's mouth with his hand. "Chill."

Alec complied, deflating a little, and he stared at Sapphire and her baby without daring to glace back up at Magnus. It happened a lot, he had noticed, whenever Alec thought that maybe he had angered him - and so, perhaps Magnus should think twice before speaking or at least, keep his tone and words gentle. He didn't really mean to _scare_ Alec, after all.

"If you don't like it..." he started.

"I do," Magnus interrupted him calmly, " _Ilmarë_ it is."

The smile that nearly split the boy's face in two was worth it. Sure, it was an odd name but at least it was so much more unexpected and unusual than the classic _Princess_ or _Beauty_ , great but common: Magnus had known his fair share of horses who bore these names and frankly, he preferred Alec's suggestion. Besides... The boy had looked so vulnerable when he'd given him the name, exposing a part of himself - he probably had to like that name to propose it in the first place, did he not? And Magnus couldn't refuse it.

"Really?" Alec breathed out, relieved that he'd at least managed to do something right. "I'm glad you like it."

They grew silent after that, merely watching Sapphire and Ilmarë. Magnus couldn't help but notice how this silence was not as heavy as it could have been, that the tension between them was not as thick as before, not... Well. To be fully honest, he couldn't even feel the tension. As if it had lessened more and more the longer they chatted about horse names, until it completely vanished.

"I should go back home," Alec whispered after a while, maybe scared to linger and force his presence on Magnus. "I promised Jace I'd spent some time with him."

The other boy scoffed, the mere mention of Blondie's name enough to get on his nerves.

"Is he jealous that you've been spending time here?" he asked, before he amended, "With me?"

Alec hesitated, not certain of what he should say, but then he gathered his courage and explained:

"Jace doesn't know I've been hanging out with you. I don't want him to... You know?"

"Get angry? Get the wrong idea, think that you're betraying him?" Magnus suggested.

"A bit of all of those, yes..." Alec grumbled, a smidge uncomfortable now that the topic had switched to his brother.

"Well, sorry," Magnus apologised, although not feeling sorry at all for the blond man, "I'm not going to invite him over. Not that he would say yes anyway, he hates me."

"So do you," Alec pointed out.

Magnus bristled at that, ready to snap that he had every reason in the world to hate the guy, but he swallowed his words just in time, realising that Alec was not, in fact, trying to rile him up but was merely stating a fact.

"He started it," he said instead, with a pout on his lips that he knew probably didn't look very mature.

Alec didn't answer to that at first, until he squirmed awkwardly and whispered:

"Yeah, I... I guess he did."

Magnus should leave it at that, he knew as much. He and Alec stood at the beginning of tentative friendship, so perhaps now was not the right time to demand a proper explanation for Jace's behaviour, during all these painful years. Yet, if he didn't ask, he might never get another chance, not under the same circumstances... Who knew, maybe they would go back to hating each other soon and then, the truth would not matter anymore.

"Why?" he eventually asked, voice low but firm.

Magnus realised that it wasn't fair, to ask Alec to justify his brother's actions. If one had to make amends, to apologise, then Jace was the one who should do it - not the boy who had stood by, even though he wasn't completely innocent either. But then again, who was? Magnus himself had some things to blame himself for as well, probably starting with judging Alec so hard before even trying to _know_ him.

The other boy remained quiet for a moment, maybe also thinking that it was not his role to explain Jace's behaviour, maybe gathering his thoughts or looking for the right words. Whatever the reason for his short silence, Alec eventually broke it.

"That day we met," Alec started, eyes set on the horses and voice shy, "The day it all started, Jace was terribly jealous."

"Jealous?" Magnus echoed, not sure to understand what he'd had, back then, that one could desire as well: he had been an orphan, freshly arrived from his homeland to a country full of strangers and a language he could barely speak.

"Yes," Alec answered, "Jace was... He hated you because you were chosen and he was not."

Magnus' eyebrows rose to show his incomprehension, something Alec didn't actually see since he was avoiding his gaze, but he had to guess he hadn't explained himself well enough, because he added, seemingly out of the blue:

"Do you know what Jace's last name is?"

 _Was that a trick question?_ , Magnus wondered even as he answered _Lightwood_ , only to have Alec finally look at him and shake his head.

"He's still a Wayland," he said softly, "His father's name. And what's yours?"

Bane. Alec knew that. Like Jimmy's, like Anna's once she'd married him. In the past, Magnus had often considered his last name as the proof that he belonged to this family - while now, all he needed was his mother's smile and his father's gaze, his parents' love, to know he was truly where he was meant to be.

"I'm not sure to follow..." Magnus admitted slowly.

"Anna and Jimmy chose you," Alec said with hesitation, "I'm sorry if this sort of topic makes you uncomfortable, I..."

"Alec," Magnus interrupted him, rolling his eyes, "It's fine. I don't mind discussing it. Now shoot."

It was sweet though, he privately thought, that the other boy would even pause to consider how Magnus would react to that conversation. Alec turned out to be way more thoughtful than he had ever imagined.

"Jace's dad..." he said, "He was friends with my parents. Close friends. When Michael died after a freaky accident, Jace... He was supposed to get into the foster system, you know."

"But he didn't," Magnus chimed in. "Your parents took him in."

"They didn't mean to," Alec answered, his voice vibrating with something akin to old, repressed anger. "Michael's will asked them to. Jace was their best friend's son and they would have let him go from one house to another for years if a piece of paper hadn't told them not to."

Alec grew quiet and Magnus didn't dare to disturb him and ask more questions. He was mostly trying to process: he had always thought that Maryse and Robert had adopted Jace - wasn't he their golden boy? He had always believed so.

"He cried, that day." Alec added, eyes set on his hands but not seeing them, going back to a time engraved in his memory. "The day we met you. He cried, because he thought there had to be something wrong with him, if Anna and Jimmy could adopt a little boy they didn't even know, while my parents would not do the same with the son of a man who had been like family to them."

Again, Magnus didn't say anything. He wasn't certain there was something to say, after all... He didn't even know what to think.

"I'm not sure why Jace said all these horrible things to you," Alec started speaking once more. "He never explained. But I think... I think he was trying to reassure himself. That you weren't better than him, that he was still worthy of... something. He didn't realise how hurtful his words were, not when they made him feel better."

Magnus nodded without saying a word. He wanted to snap, scream that one's pain shouldn't be relieved at the expanse of another one, but... Alec was not the one to blame for that. He wasn't. He had to remember that before he did something really stupid like yell at Alec instead of his brother. And Jace... Well. He had been nothing more than a kid, scared and hurt. Magnus could relate: how many years had he wondered what was wrong with him, what was so bad that his biological parents had decided to give him up?

But he hadn't taken his own doubts and insecurities out on anyone. He had not targeted the smallest or most vulnerable kid of the neighbourhood to terrify him or make him feel like shit.

"I didn't tell you this so that you'd pity Jace," Alec mumbled after a while. "I just... You asked. I explained. I'm not asking you to forgive him, that's... That's on you. No, I just... He's not a complete asshole. But I guess you wouldn't know, he never showed that side of himself to you."

Magnus almost snorted. Almost. Jace had never _not_ been a royal ass to him, so...

"Let's agree to something," Magnus suggested. "That no matter what happens between your brother and I, it won't change... this. Us."

He vaguely gestured between them, locking eyes with Alec in the process, only to find that these hazel orbs seemed too shiny and soft for his own sanity. _Don't look at me like that_ , he thought desperately, _don't look at me like I hung the moon for you_.

"Us?" Alec echoed, voice suddenly rough - and fuck, Magnus had screwed up, hadn't he?

He had just done exactly what he had promised himself he wouldn't do: get Alec's hopes up. Great. Now _he_ was the asshole.

"Us," he confirmed with a nod anyway, "Whatever _us_ means."

"Alright," Alec said quietly, averting his eyes again in a fashion that Magnus was starting to understand: secretly pleased, the boy was looking away not to show exactly how in love he was, eager to protect Magnus, while making it all the more obvious at the same time.

Magnus felt awful.

"I really should go back home," Alec repeated, this time standing up, and he glanced between the other boy and the horses as he bit his lip.

He clearly had something on his mind, something he really, really wanted to tell Magnus, even though he didn't quite know how to proceed. It absolutely did not make the other boy curious.

"What?" Magnus asked, trying not to show too much interest in the answer while still hoping it would help the boy to just spill.

Which Alec did, blurting out words that the other young man had a hard time to understand properly, for they came out in a rushed and breathless string of vowels and consonants.

"Would-you-like-to-come-around-and-see-the-horses-at-my-place-sometime?"

"I... I'm sorry, what?" Magnus asked, baffled, failing to grasp and actually believe the fact that he could be the cause of so much nervousness. "What did you say?"

He tried not to stare when Alec pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath: no use to embarrass the young man any further, right? Perhaps Magnus should feel flattered that he could turn a boy into a flustered mess but actually... He did not enjoy watching Alec splutter and blush - although the pinkish red colour made him look extremely attractive, he would not deny it. Most of all, however, he felt sorry that he had ever acted in a way that justified Alec's fear of Magnus' reaction.

"You should swing by my place," Alec repeated, more slowly and calmly, until his eyes grew wide. "I... I mean, there's no obligation, you do as you like! But I thought maybe you could come and see the horses, maybe get acquainted with Eowyn... Jace won't be there tomorrow afternoon, so I thought... You know what, forget it. It's stupid."

"It's not," Magnus protested and stood up, reaching for Alec's shoulder to keep him from bolting. "It's actually very kind of you, especially since I haven't been the most friendly person..."

"You had your reasons," Alec said shyly. "And I understand them."

Magnus shrugged but didn't answer, aware that while he'd _had his reasons_ indeed, he had also judged Alec a bit too quickly and had considered him to be the exact same dick as his blond brother - a mistake, obviously.

"I'd like to see your horses," the young man eventually said, sticking with a pleasant topic instead of thinking about Jace and his harsh words. "Thank you."

After that, Alec retreated quite quickly, maybe because of too many emotions to deal with: his beaming face clearly showed the effect of Magnus' gentle words. As soon as the Lightwood boy was gone, the other teenager let Sapphire and her baby enjoy some quality time together and left the stables, heading for the pastures where he sat in the grass, among the calm, grazing horses, and took out his phone.

A few seconds later, he had dialled Raphael's number and was anxiously waiting for his best friend to answer his call - which he eventually did, in his own grumbling fashion:

"What?" Raphael groaned with his usual cheerfulness whenever he got a phone call, the bane of his existence.

While Magnus would often reply with an amused and fond _hello to you too_ , this time he chose to ignore all formalities and went straight to business as he picked at the grass around him in a nervous automastism.

"Raphael..." he said, a bit of horror seeping into his voice, "I think I'm becoming friends with Alec."

His dramatic announcement was met with silence and still, Magnus could tell that Raphael was not impressed. At all.

"Is this why you called?" the other boy sighed at last.

"Yes!" Magnus exclaimed with wide eyes, gesturing wildly and spooking Cocoa and Achilles in the process, and both horses trotted away with displeased eyes, "Do I need to explain it better? I'm becoming friends with Alec! Alec Lightwood!"

Another sigh came from the other end of the line, and he was certain that Raphael was rolling his eyes. Was it too much to ask that he took his problem seriously?

"Cat told you he was sweet," Raphael reminded him with as much patience as he could muster - which meant, not much. "He helped me on my assignment. We've always tried to make you understand he was a good guy, so it was about time you realised that we were right, don't you think?"

Magnus scoffed: he had expected at least some support, not... Not this farce! How could Raphael be so calm? Had he forgotten that Alec and he were enemies? That they could _not_ be friends, due to their history?

"You were supposed to tell me that it was a disaster," he whimpered.

"We both befriended Ragnor," Raphael snickered, "There can be no worse disaster than that."

Well, Magnus thought, at least he'd taken it all in stride. That had to equal a blessing of sorts, didn't it?? But then, who would help him resist the boy's bright eyes and cute smile?

This _was_ a disaster.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my sister for coming up with the idea for Cocoa's and Achilles' names and thank you all for reading! I hope you're ready for the next chapter, where Magnus shall spend an afternoon with Alec... Until next time! (In order to wait, if you want, you can give a chance to my latest Malec oneshot, a knight!AU that you may find [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/13477806)!)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I only have two words for this chapter: tipping point. Enjoy!

  


Magnus felt like he had turned into stone. Frozen on his spot in front of the Lightwoods' door, he couldn't move anymore, completely unable to brace himself long enough to knock or ring the bell and make his presence known. He couldn't grasp the reason behind his sudden hesitation... He was not afraid now, was he? No, that would be ridiculous.

What was there to be afraid of, hm? Seeing Alec in his own house? Pffft. Spending time with Alec? Ah, been there, done that. Seeing the boy interact with his horses and just being his sweet self? Danger. He had already witnessed his kindness and care around horses when Alec had helped Sapphire during her foaling, a mare he was not used to handle... What would he be like with horses he loved and had known his whole life or almost so? Did he have the same kind of relationship with one of them as the friendship Magnus and Bill had developed along the years?

Fine, Magnus was scared. He dreaded to find out more about Alec, his life, his habits and routines around horses, an infinity of small but crucial details that would make him see the boy in a light even brighter than the one in which he had already started, unwillingly, to look at him. Raphael's and Catarina's words kept echoing in his mind, like a whispered prayer, trying to convince him that Alec truly was a good person. Not that Magnus still doubted that, to be honest... Alec had virtually convinced him a hundred percent when he had knelt in the straw next to Sapphire.

Men and horses... Probably his two biggest weaknesses. He should have seen it all coming.

Magnus nearly jumped out of his skin when the door suddenly burst open and for a second, his heart stopped as he thought that Jace had spotted him lurking around his home - but no, he remembered, Alec had promised that his brother wouldn't be there...

"Isabelle," he breathed out in relief as soon as he had the good sense of raising his head to see who stood in front of him.

A girl, a teenager, with lips tinted carmine thanks to a lipstick as red as her hair was dark, clad in a black dress instead of the jeans and flannel that were more commonly used by ranchers. Glancing at his own artfully ripped pants, tight around the thighs, Magnus smiled: no wonder they got on so well with each other, even with their small age difference.

"Magnus," Isabelle greeted him with a red smile, "Come on in, don't stay outside... If I didn't know you any better, I'd say you look scared! You and my brother are so alike, it's not even funny."

"What do you mean?" the young man asked, brows rising in wonder.

Her smile turned softer and she leaned in to deliver a few whispers in his ear, as if she thought that her brother would suddenly appear behind her and hear them talk about him.

"Alec is freaking out," she confessed on a low tone, before she took on a deeper voice, mimicking her brother, "Oh, Izzy, what if he comes? What if he _doesn't_ come?"

"I... don't understand," Magnus said after a few seconds. "Does he want me to stay or leave?"

Isabelle's only answer was to roll her eyes and make Magnus feel like a complete idiot. It was not the first time she did that and it would certainly not be the last. Izzy was a menace.

"Of course he wants you to stay!" she exclaimed then, before she hastily lowered her voice, "Boys are so stupid sometimes, I swear... He's dying for you to arrive and at the same time, he's busy regretting all his life choices, the last one being inviting you over, because he's scared he'll mess up and you'll go back to hating him in less than one second."

Magnus blinked. Twice.

"I... don't hate him?" he said slowly, trying to find a way to explain his conflicted feelings about the boy, before he quickly gave up in front of the Herculean task - he should think about all of it first to realise exactly how he felt about this, then try to find the right words to explain the situation.

"Good," Isabelle said with a nod, stepping aside to prompt his first steps over the threshold of the house. "Now listen to me, because I will only say this once: whatever happens between the two of you, don't break his heart. If you do..."

She didn't finish her threatening sentence but Magnus didn't need to hear the full shovel talk to understand her meaning: he would suffer a slow and painful death, that much was certain, and no one would ever find his body, ever.

He didn't tell her that he had no intention of breaking her brother's heart, because he could not promise it: how could he, when Alec was in love with him and he was not? Being friends was a terrible idea. With the nature of Alec's feelings, it could only end badly. Maybe they shouldn't even have started something like this.

It was too late now, they were both in this too far to turn around and pretend that nothing had happened: they had talked, laughed and spent time together, and now Magnus was gently knocking on the door of Alec's bedroom that Isabelle had been so kind as to show him. _Too bloody late indeed_ , as Ragnor would say.

"Magnus!" Alec exclaimed, scrambling to his feet as soon as the boy peeked inside the bedroom, only to find Alec sitting at his desk, solving what looked suspiciously like math equations - and doing a poor job at it, if the angrily scratched numbers on a spare sheet of paper were anything to go by.

Maybe they could work on those together, before school resumed? Which only gave them two days left and meant that they would nearly spend the whole weekend together but hey, this week had already turned out to be full of surprises so... One more wouldn't hurt.

"Hi," Magnus greeted the other boy, a bit weakly, for he had just noticed the clothes that Alec wore.

No pyjama bottoms, no regular jean either, but denim shorts. Damned shorts - Alec had nice legs. The colour of his shorts was unusual and Magnus had never thought that he would see this sort of turquoise on Alec, who was also wearing a short-sleeved white shirt. While Magnus couldn't say that he'd had many occasions to witness the extent of Alec's wardrobe before, he was also certain that this wasn't the sort of clothes that the boy normally wore to go about his daily life around horses... Could it be... that Alec had made an effort for him?

"Magnus!" the boy repeated, eyes wide, "I didn't know you were here already..."

"Your sister let me in," he said softly, hoping to placate the obviously anxious boy, "How are you?"

"Fine, fine!" Alec exclaimed a bit too loudly, failing at hiding his nervousness by wringing his hands restlessly. "You?"

"I'm great," Magnus chuckled, "And I seem to recall you said that you would introduce me to your horses?"

Alec's face lit up at that and the other boy silently congratulated himself for finding the one topic that would help the Lightwood to focus: after all, he didn't want this visit of his to have the same result on Alec as torture would.

However, the young man recovered quite quickly and led the way down and outside toward the stables and, beyond, to the pastures, where dozens of horses were grazing or running after each other. From what he could see, this last category was mostly made up of colts, young and carefree enough to gallop everywhere without paying the slightest attention to the adults of the herd, who kicked and showed their bared teeth to the peace-disturbers.

"Eowyn!" Alec shouted when they got closer to the fence, "Come on, girl!"

Magnus would lie if he said that he wasn't just a tiny bit impressed when the boy's huge mare lifted her head, ears forward as she all but forgot the grass at the call of her rider, and she broke in a fast trot, striding toward them with interest.

"I could shout at Horcrux all day," Magnus admitted in awe, "and he would never once consider abandoning his pals to come my way."

Alec laughed at that but he didn't share his secret, the sly fox, only smiled as he watched Eowyn come to a stop in front of them, and then he climbed up the fence to sit on the highest rail.

"Come," he prompted Magnus, who could only nod and do as he was told while Eowyn nudged Alec's knee with her nose, and he tried to settle down comfortably. "Magnus, this is Eowyn... Eowyn, love, this is Magnus... He's nice."

Magnus attempted to smile, a bit guiltily maybe, for he wasn't certain that his behaviour toward Alec had been so nice, up until a few days ago. He reached out to the mare, palm up and open to allow her to sniff him and draw her own conclusions about his character. Fortunately, she didn't bite his fingers - not that he believed that Alec would have let her - and she merely blew on his hand before she mouthed at it, no doubt searching for a treat. Magnus saw this as a small victory.

"How old is she?" he asked, scratching the mare's forehead.

"Nine," Alec answered, before a proud smile made its way onto his pink lips as he added, "I raised her myself, quite literally. Her mother rejected her when she was born, she wouldn't allow her to nurse, so I fed her with a baby bottle for months... She was weak at first, my parents didn't think she'd make it and told me to stop trying, but... Look at her now!"

Magnus did and frankly, he could only marvel at her - it helped him to ignore the feeling of his heart squeezing in sympathy for this filly who had been rejected by her mother, much like he had... Something that Alec had apparently just realised, for his expression morphed into one of horror.

"You did a great job," Magnus told him before he could splutter any apology. "She's beautiful."

It took the boy a while of guilty silence before he could even answer and Magnus suddenly remembered Isabelle's words about her brother, how he was scared to mess this up and have Magnus turn his back on him. Would he remain quiet now, preferring to stay silent instead of saying anything else that could hurt Magnus?

"Thank you," Alec eventually whispered, suddenly shy and keeping his eyes down, before he shut his mouth.

So Magnus was right: Alec didn't want to upset him any further. But the young man didn't want to let him simmer in his guilt for the whole afternoon, so he gently, slowly coaxed Alec into new conversations.

"How did you manage that?" he asked. "You were so young! And I'm sure bottle-feeding a foal must have been time-consuming..."

Alec nodded, biting his lips, but then he accidentally met Magnus' eyes and his curious gaze finally prompted him to explain.

"At school, I took recesses and lunch times off," he said, absentmindedly petting Eowyn's neck, "I used to bike all the way back home and feed her, then I would go back to class and so on. After school, I would do my homework in the stables and feed her again, and several times at night too."

"Your parents... Did they help you?"

It was probably the wrong question to ask, Magnus realised, when sadness outshone the spark in Alec's hazel eyes.

"Jace did, whenever he could," the boy answered. "My parents... They were too busy arguing with each other to handle the horses a lot, at that time. They still are, although they're trying to look after them more... And after Max. For Izzy, Jace and I, it's a bit too late for that."

Magnus stayed silent, unsure of what would be considered a proper, polite reply in this situation. A question was burning his lips, threatening to come out at the most inappropriate time, and Magnus bit his lower lip. Did Alec love his parents? If he knew anything about the boy, then he would say yes. Still, Alec didn't seem too happy as he spoke about them...

For a boy like Magnus who had known nothing but love from Anna and Jimmy, his _parents_ , the only parents who mattered, understanding how and why Maryse and Robert treated their children, Jace included, was of the utmost difficulty. In his eyes, there were two possible relationships between parents and children: either they loved each other or they didn't. He had a hard time grasping how kids could love parents who didn't treat them right or didn't give them enough love and attention.

His biological parents had never given him any love - he didn't even know who they were, so he didn't love them nor did he miss them in his current life, even though the feeling of abandonment and the prospect of being left alone terrified him. But how could Alec love absent parents like this? Parents who didn't care enough? Magnus would have grown up resentful and bitter and... He would have grown up like Jace, perhaps. Thank every deity in the world that Alec had turned out alright.

"I said I would show you the horses, not give you depressing thoughts," Alec suddenly said, jumping down the fence and inside the pasture. "Follow me."

Magnus happily obeyed and stuck to Alec as he walked through the grass and introduced the horses to him by name, always followed up by Eowyn; he nearly patted himself on the back with self-satisfaction when he asked to know more about Alec's work with his mare and saw the merry but shy glimmer in his eyes.

"I do a bit of everything," he mumbled, and added a bit bitterly, "Dressage and jumping, mostly... Because that's what my parents think is proper horse riding."

Then he leaned in Magnus' side and whispered, like it was a well-kept, precious secret:

"However, my real work with her is liberty."

He demonstrated by calling Eowyn's name to draw her attention - a bit uselessly since the mare had not looked away from him even once - and then he ran, sprinting as fast as he could in a random direction... That Eowyn immediately headed for, galloping and stopping abruptly when Alec did and turned to the left, following his every step and sudden changes in pace and direction both. And then, when Alec raised his arms to the sky and shouted _hop!_ , Eowyn reared, her hooves so close to the boy's face that Magnus' breath stopped for a second, afraid that she would kick him.

There was no aggressiveness in her behaviour though, only playfulness, for it became obvious to Magnus that it was a game to them and he even started to clap with a smile when Alec knelt by his mare's side, a bit behind her right foreleg that he gently tickled... And Eowyn bent her knee, bowing in front of a delighted Magnus.

"Don't tell me your parents don't consider this _proper horse riding_ ," he pleaded, "You make such a perfect duo!"

Alec shrugged, which was answer enough in itself, and then he looked away to hide his sudden blush. Magnus let him, fuming over the Lightwood parents' interference: how could they not see the complicity between the boy and his horse, how could they not realise the extent of sheer trust that existed between them? How could they not encourage him on this path instead of having him compete in more classic fields in which he obviously had less interest?

He didn't ask any of his questions to Alec, for he didn't think they would be welcomed, and after a while the other teenager suggested that they grabbed something to eat from the kitchen, as well as fresh drinks. Magnus caught a glimpse of Max, in the living-room, who smiled at him and waved with excitation, before he followed Alec inside the pantry. They eventually settled in the barn, sitting in the straw like they had during that fateful, stormy night not so long ago - yet, so many things had changed in such a short time!

Their spot in the barn was comfy and warm, if a bit dusty, and when the light of the sun started to decline, shadows elongating and sky turning pink and orange, Magnus startled himself thinking that it felt... intimate. A dangerous thought to have, for it made him feel like he was waiting for something, something mind-blowing and world-changing, and he didn't even know why he was thinking like that or, for that matter, what he was waiting for exactly. Perhaps this new, odd atmosphere was also what prompted Alec to speak then - his low voice seemed to resonate within Magnus. He shivered.

"I'm sorry," the young man said, staring at Magnus.

... Who felt like an idiot since he didn't really understand what Alec was apologising for. If the boy had done something wrong, Magnus didn't doubt that he would have pointed it out already.

"We talked about Jace yesterday," Alec reminded him when he realised that his sort-of-friend hadn't followed the path of his thoughts, "But not about me. And yet, I think I have as much to apologise for as he does."

 _That_ , Magnus understood - but his own reaction to Alec's beginning of an apology surprised even him as he said:

"You don't have to apologise, Alec."

The boy choked on his spit at that unexpected answer and he coughed, eyes tearing up, but as soon as he could breathe again, he exclaimed:

"I do! All these years, I..."

"I don't want to hear it," Magnus interrupted him, not unkindly, just firmly enough so that Alec would actually stop speaking and listen. "I... I don't want to talk about it. What happened, happened. I like where we stand now and I don't want... If we talk about it, I'm scared it will change what we have now."

His last words ended in a quiet whisper and he bit his lip, feeling vulnerable after uttering such words. Risking a glance Alec's way though, he could only see shy acceptance and burning love in his eyes instead of mockery. He didn't know why that still surprised him.

"I need to say this," Alec said, pleading. "Just once. And then, if you want, we may never speak of it again."

"Fine," Magnus relented, sounding a bit grumpy, and he crossed his arms against his chest as if to protect his bared soul from Alec's piercing eyes, "But then I'll start. So... I'm sorry, too. For... thinking that you were an ass when you clearly aren't. For judging you so fast. For... Never listening to you when you were trying to defend me and stop Jace."

There. Genuine but grumpy. He felt like Raphael.

"Apology accepted," Alec smiled - Magnus returned the grin and really, it was saying a lot about their curious relationship or maybe the boys' feelings, that they could go through this with a smile.

"Well then," Magnus cleared his throat, "Your turn, I guess."

Alec's smile faltered just a little bit as he mulled over what the right words to use were, those that would convey how much he was actually sorry, but... To say the truth, Magnus wasn't even sure that he cared any longer: Alec was forgiven already. Still, he guessed they had to duly do this in order to go forward with their minds at peace with each other.

"I apologise..." Alec started, voice soft and full of the regrets that had burdened his shoulders and soul for so long, "For not saying sorry before today, for not saying anything when Jace started this. We were both young but I, at least, knew that he was wrong. I'm sorry for not clearly calling him out on his behaviour back then. For not defending you."

Magnus was a bit taken aback by how many apologies Alec thought he owed him. In a stupid, carefree reflex, the boy grabbed the Lightwood's hand and squeezed it, like he would have done with one of his friends in times of emotional distress, and he didn't think about who he was sitting with before Alec squeezed back, unaware that he was tangling their fingers together while he spoke. Magnus sucked in a sharp breath but he didn't move.

"I didn't know how to say sorry before," Alec admitted painfully, so much that Magnus felt his heart break a little. "We had hurt you and... I felt so guilty already! And then I fell in love with you and it was even worse. You would look at me with disgust every time and all I wanted to do was fall to my knees and apologise over and over again but... We had spent too much time in this dynamic and I didn't know what to do. Magnus, I am so sor..."

Magnus couldn't bear to hear any more of it so he did the only thing that, in his head, would solve both problems at the same time: make Alec shut up and make him understand that he was forgiven. Magnus kissed him.

He _kissed_ him. He didn't give him a mere peck on the mouth, no, that would not have been enough: his lips crashed onto Alec's like waves breaking ashore and he felt the boy come alive under his touch, felt the surprise and then, the complete surrender. Still, Alec didn't remain unresponsive. The lips that Magnus was assaulting mercilessly were like a thorny rose, made both for giving and taking, and soon the young man fell backwards on a soft, tickling bedding of straw while Alec kissed him back.

He managed to be both gentle and passionate, literally stealing Magnus' breath away, making his toes curl as their mouths slid over one another, committing to memory every gasp that died between them, lips teasing, teeth nibbling, tongues waltzing. Magnus didn't even notice that his hands had come up to cup Alec's gorgeous face and keep him just there, close and eager, but he didn't miss Alec's own fingers digging into the right side of his hips.

They should have done this sooner, he thought with a hazy mind, this was so much better than arguing with each other! Alec was such a good kisser, tender and passionate, conveying all his love into this embrace, it... Shit. Oh fuck, fuck, fuck! How could he be so stupid?

Alec was _in love_ with him. First Magnus told him that he didn't return his feelings and now he smashed their lips together? He had promised himself he wouldn't play that sort of game for Alec's sake but this...

Magnus gently broke the kiss, doing his best not to push Alec back too harshly. The poor boy hadn't done anything wrong by kissing him: he had just answered with sincerity to Magnus' actions - as always, it seemed.

"I'm sorry," Magnus whispered as he sat up, fighting the urge to brush away the straw that was tangled in Alec's hair. "I shouldn't have done that."

"Magnus..."

"I... I should go back home," he stammered, his guilt at hearing Alec's sad voice rocketing, "Your... Your brother might come back, or your parents, and I... I should just go."

He was an idiot. Of all the things he could have done wrong, this one certainly took the palm. He almost wanted Alec to be mad at him for sending mixed signals but somehow, he wasn't surprised when the boy let him stand up and didn't ask for an explanation, allowing him to leave instead. Did he... understand what was going on in Magnus' head?

The boy had nearly reached the entrance of the barn when Alec's timid voice finally stopped him:

"Magnus..." he called softly, "Do you regret this? Kissing me?"

He could lie. Nothing would be easier - and yet, Alec deserved the truth.

"No," Magnus answered on the same soft tone, without looking at the other boy, "I don't."

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I'm very curious to know what you think will happen next, feel free to share your ideas and thoughts about this chapter in the comments :) Until next time!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! As promised on tumblr, here comes the next chapter and the aftermath of that unexpected kiss... I hope you'll like it!

  


Magnus didn't see Alec on Sunday. Well, truth to be told, he didn't see much of anyone, for he spent the major part of his day reclused, inside his bedroom, doing the homework that he should have done at the beginning of the break instead of leaving it for the very day before school resumed. He had been a bit busy though, hadn't he? He eventually went out in the afternoon to take Bill for a walk in the forest and he felt both relieved and strangely disappointed when he didn't came across Alec in the clearing.

He didn't meet him either when he entered _Tea for two_ on Monday morning to meet up with his friends before class, whom he had summoned to a war council - of sorts. He waited until they were all seated with a drink in front of them to talk.

"I kissed Alec," he said, sounding more defeated than he intended.

"You did what?!" Ragnor exclaimed, offended, "Magnus!"

The young man opened his mouth, about to ask whether his friend was offended for Alec's or Magnus' sake, when it became clear that in fact, it was all about Ragnor himself: the young man dug his hand in his pocket to retrieve a few bills that he placed in Raphael's waiting palm.

"Did you... Did you guys bet on me kissing Alec?" he asked in disbelief, too stunned to even get mad.

"We might have," Ragnor answered, unrepentant, "So, how was it?"

"Did you like it?" Catarina asked, barely able to hide her extreme interest, "Is he your boyfriend now?"

"Cat..." Magnus grumbled, "Yes, I liked it and no, he's not. That kiss didn't mean anything."

"Right," Catarina snorted.

"It didn't!" Magnus exclaimed, fighting the small voice in his head telling him that he was in denial, "You know how people have hate sex all the time? Well, we had a hate kiss, alright?"

"Do you want to have hate sex with Alec?" she shot back.

Magnus gaped at that, while Raphael rolled his eyes.

"And that's my cue to leave," he groaned, standing up with his croissant. "Magnus, as much as I love you, I don't want to hear about your sexual fantasies ever and especially not so early in the morning. See you in class."

"I'm coming with you," Magnus hurried to say, downing his coffee in two long and scalding gulps, "Believe it or not, I don't want to discuss those either."

"Spoilsports!" Ragnor shouted after them, which Magnus did his best to ignore with dignity instead of turning around and sticking his tongue out at him.

Still, the question haunted him all the way to school: did he want to have sex with Alec? Was he interested in more? And the one million dollars question: why the fuck had he thought that kissing Alec would be a great idea? What good had it done, beside endangering their tentative friendship? He hadn't spoken to the boy the previous day but if Alec was in his right mind, he would feel anger toward Magnus... Yet, right after their kiss, the young man had not seemed mad at him. He had only looked sad to see him leave. But what else could he have done?

Magnus could have stayed and kissed him some more, sure. And then it would have created irreparable damage to their relation - not to mention, Alec's heart. Magnus was aware that kissing him and then going away had certainly felt like a stab already and for that, he was truly sorry. He didn't know what had came over him, why he had dealt with the situation by smashing his lips against Alec's... Was his brain trying to tell him something? Something that he wasn't fully ready to accept yet?

"Alec is in love with you," Raphael suddenly said, as if he had read his friend's thoughts.

"I know that," Magnus answered softly.

"What about you? Do you like him?"

The one question Magnus had been hoping Raphael would not ask.

"Doesn't it seem hasty to say I like him after one week of being friends and ten years of being enemies?" he asked back, clearly stalling.

"I don't know," Raphael answered with a snarky expression on his face, "Doesn't it seem hasty to kiss the boy after one week of being friends and ten years of being enemies?"

"Remind me why we are friends in the first place," Magnus grumbled, frowning.

Raphael only laughed, clapping Magnus on the shoulder as he shook his head, definitively too amused to his friend's taste. At least Alec didn't make sharp comments like that to his face - but maybe he should. Perhaps it would help Magnus to control himself and _not_ kiss the boy like his life depended on it.

Oh, who was he kidding? He had told Catarina the truth: kissing Alec had been an amazing experience, although not as satisfying as it could have been, had it ended in other circumstances - had he not feared to hurt Alec. But yes, he had enjoyed it very much and... Those lips had the taste of _forbidden_ and perhaps Magnus was weak, but it was a temptation he had not been able to resist. _Alec_ was irresistible. Not only to kiss but also...

Shit. He guessed he could not lie to himself any longer. He had discovered a sweet and somewhat shy boy when he'd peeked behind the curtain and it was too late to draw it now.

"Maybe..." Magnus started, stressing the hypothetical character of his statement, "Only maybe... I'm a little attracted to Alec."

"A little?" Raphael echoed, clearly disbelieving. "One week was enough to have you kissing him but you're only _a little attracted_ to him? Come on..."

"What do you want me to say?" Magnus groaned, gesturing helplessly. "I can't confess my undying love for him either!"

Raphael shrugged, as if he didn't see the problem in such a turn of events. Magnus did, though. One week couldn't be enough to truly know someone so of course, he couldn't tell how deep his... his _affection_ for Alec ran. Fine, he liked him. As a friend, certainly; as more, that remained to see. Friends kissed each other sometimes too, didn't they? Well, no. Weak excuse. Magnus couldn't picture himself kissing Cat, Ragnor, or dear old Raphael, who had made it clear on more than one occasion that he would kill Magnus if he ever dared approaching him with pursed lips - and Magnus valued his life, thank you very much.

So. No normal friends. Fine. He could live with that. Whatever he and Alec were and what they could possibly become with time, Magnus would let the realisation dawn on him at its own pace: forcing himself to think of Alec in a certain way, when it didn't come to him naturally, would only end up in hurting them both.

Perhaps, in the meantime, he should try not to think about it. Magnus was usually excellent at ignoring his problems.

Entering the classroom for his first class of the day proved to be a useful distraction, until he remembered that he and Alec nearly had the same timetable and that they shared their math class. Great. He didn't mean to avoid the boy forever but... Magnus had assumed, before the event that he would soon start to refer to as The Kiss, that they wouldn't talk to each other at school, not when Jace could see them, not when other teenagers could tattle and spread rumours that would, inevitably, go back to Blondie's ears.

Now, given their current... predicament... He wasn't even sure that Alec would still want to talk to him outside of school.

Perhaps he didn't have to worry too much though: Magnus tried to focus on his teacher's explanations while they checked their homework together, he really tried, for he considered himself a dedicated student under all circumstances and even during classes he didn't like that much. However... He kept glancing at Alec every five minutes or so, unable to resist, and he caught the boy looking at him as well several times - before Alec hurriedly looked down at his notebook and kept scribbling in it, a faint blush spreading across his cheeks. Could Magnus take it as a good sign?

A sign that maybe Alec had been _very_ affected by their wild kiss and couldn't help but remembering it whenever he saw or even merely thought about Magnus? Magnus would certainly feel less alone if that were the case.

... One could hope and dream, right?

Magnus had thought that they would keep looking at each other from afar, frustrated and longing but Alec kept surprising him and proved him wrong as soon as the class was over. One minute Magnus was gathering his pencils and notes before walking out of the room and the next, Alec was grabbing his wrist in the middle of the crowded hallway to drag him into an empty classroom.

Magnus expected the boy to yell at him. Hit him maybe, because he hadn't reached out to him the previous day or because he hadn't exactly acknowledged him at school - but no, he didn't believe that punching someone was Alec's default reaction when confronted with the boy who had kissed him and walked away without a word of explanation. Perhaps Magnus would have deserved a punch, though.

Instead of all of that, Alec threw him against the nearest wall and kissed him as if he had been waiting for years to do that again, as if the memory of their mouths tasting each other had haunted him, day and night, ever since Saturday and their afternoon in the barn. Too surprised to react, Magnus allowed himself to be thoroughly kissed. Not that he would have fought Alec anyway, even if he hadn't been so shocked by the suddenness of it all.

When Alec stepped back, his hands still loosely holding onto Magnus' hips as if he was scared that his friend would run away, his mouth was red and swollen, his eyes sparkling and his hair a mess - as usual, since Alec seemed completely unable to tame it. All in all, the young man looked too alluring for Magnus' brain to work properly.

"What was that?" he whispered, a bit stunned still.

"A kiss," Alec answered, stating the obvious, sounding as confident as his cheeks looked flushed, "As well as a way to get your attention, I guess."

"You have it," Magnus immediately shot back, fighting a dreamy smile, "Completely."

"Good. Because I think we should talk."

Magnus sighed. It was useless to play dumb and ask the other boy what he thought there was to talk about... He knew all too well what they should discuss and he also knew that Alec was right. They really, really needed to have a word. Especially if Alec thought that keeping on kissing him at the most unexpected times was a good idea... He couldn't blame the boy though, Magnus knew he had started it.

"You want me to tell you why I kissed you?" Magnus queried, guessing that it was like ripping off a Band-Aid: the quicker, the better.

"No," Alec answered, to Magnus' utter confusion.

"B... But... I thought..." he stammered, completely out of his depth now, looking into the hazel orbs in distress, "I thought you wanted to talk about..."

"I do," Alec said this time, doing nothing at all to make Magnus understand what this was all about, "But I... don't want to know why you did it. Nor the reasons you _didn't_ do it for."

Oh. So... Alec was scared. Scared, and rightfully so, that this kiss didn't mean the same to the both of them... He did not want to hear that Magnus didn't love him but had kissed him anyway. Perhaps Alec didn't want to know what Magnus had to say about The Kiss in order to protect his heart but didn't it mean that he was also lying to himself? Allowing himself to believe that maybe Magnus liked him more than he let on...

"Then..." he started hesitantly, "What do you want to know?"

Instead of giving him a proper and direct answer that would have calmed his nervousness a little, Alec actually asked him another question:

"You still don't regret it, do you?"

"No," Magnus said truthfully, curious to see where Alec was going with this.

"And you liked it, correct?" he asked again, cheeks colouring as he leaned down just a little bit, as if he didn't want to miss a single word that would come out of Magnus' mouth.

Goodness, Alec was too close. He could feel the warmth of his tall body radiating and caressing his own through the thin shirt he was wearing, and his eyes, intense, searching for the truth and staring at him... A long, pleasurable shiver ran up and down his spine then, one that Alec didn't fail to notice. One of his thick brows rose in keen wonder and his eyes shifted from his face to his neck and his Adam's apple, before they settled on his lips.

"So?" he whispered roughly.

"Yes," Magnus breathed out, almost mesmerised, "I did."

Alec kissed him again, deep and slow this time, and Magnus felt him tremble against him when he cupped his face in both of his hands. After they broke the kiss, panting and disoriented, the taller boy rested his forehead against his own and closed his eyes. Magnus would have done the same if he hadn't feared to miss out on Alec's beauty: his dark brows, his pink cheeks and his parted lips, all of him. He looked like one of those statues from the Greek antiquity, except that he was cold beauty made flesh and life for Magnus' eyes.

"We don't have to stop doing this," Alec said softly, opening his eyes after a while of silence that neither of them had felt like breaking too soon, relishing the tense but intimate atmosphere.

"What do you mean?" Magnus said, his voice no louder than a whisper.

"That we both enjoy... this," Alec answered, gesturing between them, his hand brushing against one of Magnus', just this close to actually hold it. "We might as well keep doing this and... see where this will lead us."

Magnus' eyebrows arched up in surprise upon hearing what Alec was suggesting: that they allowed themselves to get closer, like boyfriends would, without giving themselves that specific name, without defining their relationship any further, not until they were both (read, Magnus) ready for it. It was a bad, bad idea. What if Magnus never felt the way Alec did?

"Alec..." he tried, unable to hide the sadness in his voice - he didn't want to hurt the boy and the prospect of never returning his feelings filled him with sorrow. "I don't think..."

"You don't have to promise me anything," Alec reassured him before Magnus could voice his thoughts. "I know it might not take us anywhere I wish it did."

Was Alec truly ready to do that? Just for a chance to spend at least a little while as if they were more than just friends?

"I don't want to break your heart," Magnus admitted slowly, hoping that Alec would reconsider, for his own sake.

But the Lightwood boy shook his head, gentle smile dancing on his lips, surprising Magnus all over again.

"I handled my heart just fine when you hated me," he explained, trailing his fingertips along Magnus' jaw with a tender gaze. "I think I can deal with just being friends if this is what you truly want, in the end."

Magnus sighed, leaning his cheek in Alec's palm as he closed his eyes. He felt warm all over, a delightful comfort that he didn't want to give up on. Neither on that nor on Alec's talented mouth, his laughter and his shyness, his consideration for all horses and his kindness. He didn't want to give up on _Alec_.

Magnus opened his eyes and stared into the other boy's.

"Alright," he stated, earning a tentative but bright smile. "Promise me though... Promise me that if it gets too hard on you, at any point, you'll tell me. And we will stop."

Alec didn't answer right away, taking the time to peck his lips in a sweet and brief kiss before he did.

"I promise," he said, standing upright afterwards, "Don't worry. Who knows, maybe you'll fall in love with me, eventually?"

He smiled then but it didn't fool Magnus: it looked just a bit too forced and desperate. Was it a mistake? An even worse idea than the young man initially thought? But if Alec wanted it... He was the one with his heart on the line so shouldn't Magnus at least respect his decision? _He_ didn't mind kissing Alec and his own feelings were not running many risks by agreeing to do this so...

Besides, perhaps it would help the other boy: maybe he would grow tired of Magnus after a while, realise that he was stubborn, opinionated, sharp-tongued and a bit of a drama queen from time to time... And Alec would understand that he deserved someone else, someone as sweet as him... Oddly, the prospect of Alec giving up on him didn't please Magnus much.

The young man shook his head and he flashed an hesitant smile to the other boy, who then opened the door of the classroom and gestured him to walk out first - always so polite and thoughtful. What had he done to deserve the love of someone like Alec Lightwood? What had the boy ever done to be dealing with unrequited feelings? Something in this didn't sound fair.

Once they were both standing in the hallway, crowded with other students who had not seen them stumble in and out of the empty classroom or simply didn't care, Alec apologised to Magnus.

"I have to run or my French teacher will get mad at me for being late," he said, before he added with a high-pitched voice as he mimicked his teacher, " _Monsieur Lightwood, vous êtes un voyou!_ " 

Magnus laughed at that, although he hadn't understood the exact meaning of the sentence, because chuckling was better than drooling after hearing the young man speak French. Even while doing an impression of Mrs. Dupont, the lady who taught French and who was so old she had probably lived through the storming of the Bastille, according to Raphael, Alec's voice in that language so foreign to Magnus sounded nice.

"Will I see you later?" Magnus blurted out and, before he could think better of it, grabbed Alec's hand so that he couldn't walk away.

The young man smiled at him then, with a gaze so soft it nearly made Magnus uncomfortable, because he was not certain that he deserved to be looked at this way. However, he knew for a fact that if he ever dared voicing out this sort of thoughts to Alec, the boy would certainly disagree and make him understand exactly why he deserved it and so much more by spewing all sorts of compliments.

"You will," Alec said, making it sound like a promise, and he turned shy again as he added, "I was thinking that maybe we could go trekking after school. You, Horcrux, Eowyn and I."

"Homework first," Magnus answered, unconsciously stalling so that he could mentally freak out about his friend's suggestion.

Not only freak out but also, picture the scene perfectly: the two of them, plus the horses, side by side on a narrow path, galloping, stopping, dismounting and rolling in the grass, kissing and laughing and... Being awfully close and enjoying every second of it.

"Yes," Alec agreed, unaware that Magnus was thinking about leaning over his saddle to grab him by the collar and smooch him properly, "Homework first. But then, if you want..."

"Yes," Magnus interrupted him with a smile. "Trekking. Perfect."

"Really?"

Alec's voice was filled with hope and wasn't it a testament, one more, of how deep and intense his feelings for Magnus were? A mere _yes_ and a smile from him made the Lightwood boy look like the happiest man alive. Magnus realised how dangerous that could get, no matter what Alec said about handling his heart without trouble.

"Yes, really," Magnus answered with a playful roll of his eyes, before he swatted the boy away, "Run now! Before Mrs. Dupont _vooyooes_ you again, or whatever."

Alec started to laugh at Magnus' awful pronunciation - or grammar, although he wasn't sure it wasn't a bit of both - and he was still laughing when he planted a kiss on his lips and walked away. The young man stood there like an idiot, oblivious to his own English class that would start soon or perhaps already had, Alec's laughter echoing in his mind. He liked that sound... But he liked to be the source of it even more.

Shit. He couldn't get attached like that. Because maybe he would, yeah, because he liked Alec, but he didn't love him and he didn't think he would fall in love with him so in the end, they would have to go their separate ways, wouldn't they? And if Alec mistook his growing affection for love... Damn it. How did one draw the perfect line between deep friendship and romantic feelings? Because Magnus sure never learned that. All he had learned in the past was that loving someone hurt and he owed that lesson to Camille.

He immediately felt guilty for even daring to compare Alec to her. Alec was adorable, honest and kind, whereas Camille was cunning, cold, calculating. If... Only _if_ he found himself developing actual feelings of romantic love for Alec, then perhaps he should accept them. If it ever happened, of course. Maybe the boy was the best person to help him learn and understand that being in love didn't have to hurt or end badly.

In the meantime, they would just... kiss. And laugh. And spend time together, talk, ride side by side, kiss some more, share details of their life and... Who knew, maybe they would hold hands. Cuddle. Watch a movie together, snuggling up into each other on the couch and have Anna and Jimmy gently laugh at them and say that they reminded them of themselves, years ago, when they were teenagers in love and not yet married...

Magnus closed his eyes under the sudden onslaught of emotions that overwhelmed his heart and made him desire, long, crave. He wanted it all.

Magnus was royally screwed.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! For your information, when Alec says _Monsieur Lightwood, vous êtes un voyou!_ , it means _Mister Lightwood, you are a thug!_ Magnus then tries to use the substantive _voyou_ as a verb (and fails at it, obviously.) That's all for the French lesson ;)
> 
> If you are interested in reading another Malec story of mine while waiting for the next chapter, you can check out [this](http://archiveofourown.org/works/13696626) new oneshot :) Until next time!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I'm one hour and half late with the update but in my defense, I had to stay at school a bit longer than planned to grade my students' assignments ^^ I hope you'll enjoy the new chapter!

  


Trekking with Alec was awfully romantic. As much as romantic could go when you were not-dating your not-boyfriend. It was even worse that Eowyn and Horcrux hit it off as soon as Alec met him on the path that led to the forest. Horcrux whinnied when he saw the mare, ears pricking up, tail swishing in his excitation to get a new friend, and Eowyn answered in kind, even starting to trot to join the other faster.

Alec and Magnus allowed them to get properly acquainted, giving them the reins for several long minutes so that they could extend their necks and sniff each other with flared nostrils. The boys laughed when Eowyn squeaked and Horcrux flinched, startled, before he happily bumped noses with the mare and flapped his lips against hers. Great. If even their horses started to act all lovey-dovey with each other...

Still, Magnus had to admit that riding next to Alec was nice. Even better than he had expected. They rode in relaxed silence for a while, listening to the sound of their horses' hooves on the path, slow and regular, and the sounds of the nature around them, the wind blowing in the leaves, the branches cracking, the bushes rustling before a wild rabbit ran away, spooked by the horses.

And then, they talked. About school, a bit. About their horses, a whole lot more. And about each other. Magnus learned that Alec was slowly starting to upgrade his liberty work with Eowyn and he was impressed, as well as slightly horrified, when his friend explained how he rode her, without tack, _standing upright on her_. And he was considering _jumping_ like that, once his balance troubles would be fixed. Holy crap.

"I can barely jump bareback," Magnus confessed in awe, before he added in concern, "Please don't go breaking your neck."

"Don't worry," Alec reassured him, putting both reins in his left hand to pat Magnus' thigh with the one he had just freed. "I do this step by step."

Magnus might have covered Alec's fingers with his own, just to keep the young man's hand right there. It felt good... And Magnus was not one to say no to good things, most of the time, so he smiled in contentment when Alec didn't remove his hand until much later, when their horses had warmed up enough by walking and trotting, so that they could eventually break in a slow gallop through the forest.

Well, at least they had intended to keep a slow pace. Then, Magnus met Alec's gaze and smirked at him, challenge intense in his eyes as he loosened the reins and let Horcrux run free, speeding up along the path and distancing Eowyn in only a few strides. Magnus laughed when he heard Alec splutter, followed by the noise of hooves trampling the ground, and he looked behind his shoulder with a grin as his friend attempted to catch up to them.

He didn't. Eowyn tried her best though but in the end, unwilling to exhaust the mare, Magnus slowed down to a gentle trot, then an unhurried walk, waiting for Alec and his horse to reach them. The other teenager reappeared after a turn of the sinuous path, sporting a smile that got Magnus' heart to miss a beat. Alec's cheeks were pink from the race and a dazzled spark gleamed in his eyes - it looked good on him. Magnus loved it.

"I won," he said just to tease the other boy.

"You got a head start," Alec playfully argued, coming up at his level with loose reins to let Eowyn stretch her neck and walk at her own pace, "That's cheating."

Laughing, they dismounted to give some rest to their horses as they walked by their sides, and Magnus dug his hand into the pockets of his saddle pad to grab two quarters of the apple he had cut in the kitchen before going out to meet Alec and Eowyn. He gave one to Horcrux and reached out to give the other one to Alec, glancing at him with a question in his eyes. Some people were peculiar about giving treats to their horses and Magnus wouldn't want to do something that Alec would not usually do, so...

"Thanks," Alec said with a smile, taking the chunk of apple to gift it to his mare.

And then, his hand came back for Magnus', as if looking for another treat to give to Eowyn, except that Alec caressed his friend's wrist with light fingertips, slowly sliding down until he could slot his palm into his Magnus' hand, interlacing their fingers. Each movement was calm and slow, nearly hesitant, as if waiting for Magnus to break free of Alec's gentle hold on his hand - but he didn't want to.

Actually, the more Magnus tried to convince himself that he didn't like Alec _that_ way, the more he told himself that he should stop playing this game that the other had suggested in the first place, the more reluctant he became to do so.

Their hands fit together like they were meant to hold hands this way, fingers entwined and warm on each other's skin. Magnus didn't comment when he saw how quickly Alec flushed red when he squeezed his hand, nor did he say anything about his incredibly sappy grin. He too, he guessed, would feel impossibly happy if the person he loved held his hand like this... Which prompted Magnus to actually focus on his own reaction to their intertwined fingers and... Well.

Alec was not the only one smiling like an idiot, as it turned out. And wasn't it a bit weird, that Magnus didn't remember smiling as foolishly when he had held Camille's hand? He had loved her though... The young man forced himself to stop right there: he didn't want to think about her, not when he was walking next to a boy as sweet as Alec.

They eventually turned up in the clearing where they had met the previous week, so long ago it seemed, and they let the horses graze at their leisure, tying a knot in the reins so that neither Eowyn nor Horcrux would tangle their legs in the leather straps and break something. The boys watched their horses roam free around the clearing, knowing that they would not go far as long as there was grass to eat there, and they sat side by side on the dry ground.

The storm from the previous week had passed as quickly as it had arrived, the rain allowing the sun to shine brightly again, and the temperatures had started to go up; Magnus foresaw a hot summer - but not too hot, hopefully, to keep him and his friend from going on the trip they had discussed before... Catarina, Ragnor, Raphael (on horse or on a bike, if they couldn't get him to ride with them) and him. And maybe, just maybe... Alec could come, too.

"What are you thinking about?" Alec asked then, making Magnus scratch his neck a bit awkwardly.

"You," he admitted, embarrassed but awfully pleased to see the delight that flashed across his boyfriend's face.

Not-boyfriend. Did he think boyfriend? Shit. _Not. Boyfriend_. 

Thankfully, Magnus didn't get more time to freak out about his mental lapsus linguae: spurred on by the unexpected confession, Alec leaned in to capture his lips in what he had probably intended to be a gentle, fond kiss - except that Magnus seldom stuck to plans, even the best ones. Maybe he enjoyed Alec's mouth too much for that.

As he deepened the kiss, surprising Alec by his enthusiasm, his hands came up to cradle his jaw, fingertips caressing the young man's cheeks as if he wanted to study his face, memorise every line of it to recreate its beauty when they would be apart from each other. He gasped when Alec's fist closed around the collar of his shirt and tightened, making it seem like he was scared to lose his hold onto reality if he let go.

Magnus didn't need more encouragement: barely aware of what he was doing, he turned and pushed on his knees to properly straddle Alec and sit on his lap, all too focused on closing as much distance as possible between their bodies. He only noticed their new position when Alec's breathing hitched and the boy suddenly surged forward to kiss him with even more desperate need, his hands flying to Magnus' waist to push him flush against him and...

Oh fuck. Alec was adorably pink in the face and he was panting between their lips as they slowly grinded together, the seams of their jeans creating a wonderful but nearly painful pressure on their crotch - they couldn't stop. Didn't want to anyway, hands grappling but also oddly shy as they remained atop their clothes, not daring to slip under a shirt, and not even Magnus managed to gather enough courage to trail his hand down to the triangle of skin that showed: Alec's shirt, tucked in his pants not five seconds ago, had wiggled its way out and had unveiled an absolutely tantalising complexion. Tan, less than his own bronze skin, having become golden under the sun during long afternoons in the field, working with horses.

In spite of their obvious want to do so, neither boys involved their hands with their clothes and in a way, perhaps it was better like this. More would have been too much for their sanity, already crumbling as they slowly thrust onto each other, and Magnus let out a small noise, half-groan and half-moan that had Alec tense and shudder against him... Magnus was lost then, as he stared at the other boy and the wild, unrestrained bliss on his face, and they slowly came to a stop.

For a second or two, they drowned into each other's eyes in silence, until they blinked and realised what had just happened. Alec's face still looked red, although Magnus could no longer tell whether it was due to his shyness or caused by the heat of their previous activity.

"Are you alright?" he asked slowly, pushing back a strand of hair that barred the boy's gorgeous eyes.

"Fine," Alec answered with a rough voice, as if he hadn't spoken in years. "I feel... incredible."

Magnus chuckled, relieved that neither of them was completely freaking out about this unexpected turn of events. Still, he said:

"I guess this wasn't really part of the deal. I'm sorry if I was..."

"The deal includes whatever we want, consent to and feel comfortable with," Alec interrupted him, going as far as to press a finger against Magnus' lips, and then he suddenly deflated like a pricked balloon. "I... I mean... If you want? This is all about trying, right?"

"I guess, yes," Magnus agreed with a nod. "So that was... alright?"

"More than that," the other boy replied with a slightly embarrassed chuckle, "It was great. And... You? Was it... alright?"

"Great," Magnus said with a wink, before he placed a soft, undemanding kiss on Alec's puffy lips. "It won't be that great when we'll stand up but..."

Alec's sputtering laughter was delightful to hear and Magnus couldn't resist lacing their fingers together, feeling like this was the missing piece for this instant to be truly perfect - if he ignored the annoying voice in his head telling him that the disaster he had foreseen when they had started _this_ was waiting for him, right around the corner.

Magnus looked at Alec with wonder when the other boy glanced at something behind him and he yelped when a warm breath fell over the back of his head, upsetting his hair and making him flinch in surprise. Alec laughed softly, his hands helping Magnus to stay on his lap and not fall in the grass, and they both looked at Horcrux. The young horse was looking at them with confused eyes, perhaps trying to work out why his human was riding Eowyn's human instead of him.

"Jealous?" Magnus asked him, tickling Horcrux's nose.

His horse snorted, something that Magnus wasn't sure he knew how to exactly interpret, and then Alec gently tapped his friend's thigh.

"Maybe we should go back," he suggested, "before it gets too late."

"Right," Magnus agreed, privately thinking that Alec's parents would probably not be too happy if their son arrived late for dinner. "Maybe we should go back on feet though, you know?"

He glanced meaningfully at their crotches, waiting for a blush of comprehension to settle high on his friend's cheekbones once he would realise that riding would be uncomfortable as hell... And he smiled when it did, kissing Alec on both of his red cheeks before he stood up, a bit clumsily, and grabbed Horcrux's reins to untie the knot he'd made in them. The horses looked quite surprised when neither Magnus nor Alec put their foot in the stirrup to get on their back but led them on the path towards the ranches instead.

He remembered doing so with Bill, the week before, storming away from Alec and angry at the young man for his inconsiderate words when actually, he had been the one to misunderstand and be too stubborn to even think that Alec might mean what he said. It was so much like him, he thought, to be so impulsive only to regret it later... They had made a lot of progress in one week and he was glad for it, glad for Alec's stubbornness and his kind heart that had made him wait for Magnus to give him a chance.

"There's a competition next Saturday," Alec said after a while. "Will you be riding?"

"Yeah," Magnus answered, "It's a small one and Horcrux still needs training... Not that I aim for big championships but you know... It's good for him. I take it you and Eowyn will be there too?"

Alec nodded in silence, looking a bit gloomy at the prospect, but he explained why before Magnus could even point out that competing when your heart wasn't in it could be a hindrance.

"My parents want me to keep riding in competitions," he told his friend. "Jace likes it but I don't, not really. Yeah, it's fun to challenge yourself and your horse, once or twice, but... It's been years and I'm tired of it. I want to enjoy other things, too."

"Liberty," Magnus guessed. "That's what you enjoy the most."

He wasn't asking, certain that he was right, but Alec nodded anyway and Magnus took his hand.

"I know," he said gently. "It shows on your face... You looked so happy, last time..."

"And I am," Alec replied, squeezing Magnus' fingers.

The young man wasn't sure that they were still talking about Alec's liberty work with Eowyn - or about them, how Magnus made his friend happy. He just hoped that he would not end up breaking his heart. Alec deserved better.

"I was thinking," the Lightwood boy added, unconsciously swinging their hands as they walked, which Magnus interpreted as a sign of nervousness - did he still make Alec nervous after what they had done together? "Do you think perhaps we could... practice together?"

"For the competition?" Magnus asked, a bit surprised by the request. "Sure, why not?"

"Thank you... It would make it more enjoyable for me."

"I thought you were training with Jace though," Magnus said slowly, "And as much as I like you, I don't really want to suffer his presence."

Alec laughed a little, already well aware of that fact, and Magnus nibbled on his lower lip in sudden worry. He was an only child. But how did it feel to have siblings and know that your boy... _not-boyfriend_ hated one of them? To know that one of your siblings would probably never support your not-romantic relation with your not-boyfriend? Maybe it felt like parents who didn't accept their child's sexuality. Something else that Magnus could not understand, for Anna and Jimmy loved him unconditionally, bisexuality and all, but Maryse and Robert had probably not welcomed Alec's homosexuality with open arms. They could not even accept the alternative way Alec worked with his mare, so a different sexuality...

"Don't worry," the boy said, interrupting the trail of his thoughts, "Jace isn't sure to ride this weekend: he has a big assignment in Spanish - and he sucks. So between school and Clary... He's not sure to have enough time to train with Dandy."

Magnus didn't say it but he still thought that it was perfect: more time to enjoy Alec's presence only. Still, he knew that the animosity Jace and he felt toward each other would pose a problem one day, if Alec and he kept their relationship as it was now... Well, _if_. No need to think too much ahead, right?

Heart heavy with interrogations, confusion as well as regret to part ways with Alec already, Magnus headed back home while his friend did the same, still taking the time to promise each other to meet again after school the next day. Magnus groomed Horcrux in his stall, getting him rid of all the dust he could get rid of, a tremendous effort that the horse promptly ruined by rolling himself in the straw as soon as his rider was done. Great.

"Thanks," he grumbled, still sliding his hand through his horse's coat with tenderness - how could he not?

A bit later that evening (one shower and a change of clothing later, to be accurate), when Magnus sat at the table with his parents for dinner, he spared a thought for Alec who shared his meal with his three siblings and his own parents, who argued more often than not. He wondered how it usually went, tried to imagine whether it was a moment of peace and a good time to spend in family or a moment that Alec, as well as his brothers and his sister, dreaded. Magnus realised that he was poking at his broccoli with his fork when his father called his name, for what was apparently the second time, and his head snapped up.

"What?" he asked with confusion, the major part of the conversation lost on him.

"I asked if you were alright," Jimmy repeated with a knowing smile. "You're awfully quiet... First day of school after the break, I thought you would have a lot of things to say."

"I do," Magnus answered, which was true: it had been an eventful first day after all. "I'm just distracted."

"We can see that," Anna chuckled, before her expression turned deadly serious and she added, "Did I burn the broccoli or does it have something to do with Alec?"

Magnus chocked on the aforementioned broccoli he had finally put in his mouth to pretend that he was absolutely peachy, _thank you_ , when his mother said Alec's name. Crap. Was he that transparent?

"Maybe," Magnus mumbled around his mouthful, before he started to cough.

"Swallow, then talk," his father suggested, "That might be better."

The young man could see the wisdom in such a statement, so he did just as he was told, enjoying the twin expressions of expectation on his parents' faces.

"What makes you think this is about Alec?" he asked as soon as he could safely do so, without running the risk to choke to death or spit his vegetables across the table.

"Aside from your reaction and the defensiveness?" Jimmy smirked.

Anna elbowed him.

"You became friends last week," she said while her husband massaged his ribs with a frown - and a smitten look. "You've been hanging together more in five days than you have in ten years so... We're wondering."

She didn't say anything else: she resumed eating, as if she wasn't waiting for him to give them some more information. She was dying for it though, he could tell as much, but she had not asked any question, choosing instead to let him decide whether or not he wanted to share with them what he had on his mind. He loved his parents.

"Alec is in love with me," Magnus eventually admitted.

It seemed more and more natural to say, every time he told someone. Catarina, Raphael, now his parents... Maybe Jimmy and Anna could help him see the situation from an adult's point of view, through the eyes of someone who was supposed to be mature and who would not wonder about the nature of his feelings for Alec and explode.

They didn't look that surprised, much to his annoyance, but then he remembered that he had told his mother about _someone_ who liked him. And then he had been spending more and more time with Alec, so... Yeah. His parents were far from blind.

"And?" Jimmy prompted him gently.

"And... I don't know. We... We're dating, I guess, except that we aren't, not really. We're trying it out. See if it, if _we_ , can work out."

"Be careful, Magnus," Anna immediately said, looking worried, "It could be..."

"I know," he whispered, casting his eyes down as he felt the acute shame of playing with Alec's heart, even though he didn't mean to. "I know I could hurt him if I'm not careful enough."

"Actually, I was more worried about you," his mother corrected him.

"Me?" Magnus echoed, surprised.

Why would she be concerned about him? Magnus was fine: Alec had given him the opportunity to spend time with him, to receive amazing kisses and to feel giddy, happy with every second they shared together, so... Why?

"Yes, you," Anna answered with a small smile. "I think you should be careful with your own heart... Don't go realising too late that you love Alec as well."

"B... But!" Magnus spluttered, "I don't! I mean, I don't think so? Sure, I like him as a friend but... I'm still trying to understand, to work out whether or not I like him _like him_."

He expected his parents to tell him that he was right to take things slow and to take the time to think over his true, deep feelings, so he was surprised when his father grinned and said:

"If you need to ask yourself the question... Maybe it means that you already have the answer. Maybe all there is left to do now is... to accept it."

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are interested in seeing what Alec is attempting to do with Eowyn, I suggest to watch [this video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EP-Xw6W2JZ0) of Lorenzo, the "flying Frenchman" who does this at a professional level. Alec is trying with only one horse, which is more difficult since both his feet must be placed on Eowyn's croup. If he had two horses, he could spread his legs a little and it would become easier to stand :)  
> Thank you for reading!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I'm so sorry for the long wait you had to go through for this chapter, life's been rather hectic these past few days and I've had a lot of work with my students, my horse and my friends' horses that I'm taking care of. That being said, don't worry, I'm not giving up on this story (ever.) I hope you'll enjoy this chapter!

  


Two days weren't enough to fall into an easy routine. At least, they shouldn't have been. Apparently though, Magnus' life was running at high speed at the moment so he was barely even surprised when he found himself sitting next to Alec in their math class, on Wednesday morning. If this went on, Magnus would start to wonder how he had managed to make it so far into life without Alec by his side.

His friends were asking the same question, although they started to follow with a _when are you getting married?_ that made Magnus redden every time, without fail. They were merely teasing him but it still made the young man think and wonder... Not about a potential wedding date, mind you, but about his feelings. Always that same problem.

His father had probably been right: if Magnus was so set on not liking Alec in more than a friendly way, why was the question still coming back to his brain? He should have been done with it, irrevocably. Perhaps it was time to stop ignoring the signs his mind was restlessly sending him. What was the worst that could happen?

But Magnus wasn't sure that he was ready, that he could make Alec happy and give him as much love as he deserved. The teenager was still quite set on the thought that it could only end in a bad way... Not only because of his failed relation with Camille but also because of his history with Alec. Of course he had forgiven the Lightwood boy, he had said so before and his words had been genuine. He didn't feel any resentment towards Alec but that wasn't the case when it came to Jace. Magnus might know that he was not in a relationship with Blondie, he also knew that Jace mattered to Alec. Obviously. They were brothers, in everything but blood. Magnus would not ask him to choose between either of them, that would be plainly cruel and heartless. Still, he could not bring himself to swallow his pride and take the first step to make their relation just a bit less hostile. Jace had started it. He might as well find the bravery required to stop it.

Blondie and thoughts about failed love put aside, not-dating Alec was awesome. Fantastic. He would recommend it, except that it would mean having other people not-dating Alec and no, thank you, he was perfectly fine with being exclusive in their relationship of not-yet-boyfriends.

But Magnus felt comfortable kissing, touching and doing some other, light sexual stuff - although nothing else had happened since their evening in the forest but the idea of _more_ was (very) appealing - and he knew himself: he would not feel that way if he didn't have some kind of emotional connection to Alec. He hadn't felt comfortable enough to have sex with Camille and yet, he had loved her. There had to be something about Alec, something that made him feel good, unabashedly happy, so much that Raphael had told him that he looked like a man who had seen the sun after walking in a year-long night. If Raphael started to speak like a poet, it had to mean something.

"Make a list," Ragnor suggested when Magnus brought his problem of making a decision to him. "What you like, what you don't like about your relation..."

"Not-relation," Magnus corrected, although he realised that he didn't mind the confusion so much.

"Right," his friend said, rolling his eyes so hard he nearly sprained something. "Still. Do that. Maybe then you'll want to upgrade your not-relation to an actual relation. You'll have time to tell him that you love him later on."

Sometimes Magnus wasn't sure to like his friends very much, especially not when they had good ideas and used eye-opening words. He hadn't written that list yet though... Perhaps he dreaded to see an actual, undeniable result on that sheet of paper.

Still he had to admit, without any lingering doubt, that Alec made him happy. They had trained together after school the previous day, like they had planned, and Magnus had enjoyed it. He usually prepared for a competition with his father but this time, Jimmy had watched them with a smile on his face and without interfering, before he left them alone in the arena, giving them the occasion to work as they wished - or to do other things, although they had been tame: save for a few stolen kisses here and there, they had mostly focused on their practice.

That evening, Magnus welcomed Alec with a grin and a hand fisted in his t-shirt to pull him closer and kiss his lips, capturing the lingering taste of pineapple that his friend had certainly gotten as a snack while he did his homework, before he saddled Eowyn and came to Magnus' humble lair. Alec was the king of healthy snacks.

"Ready?" Magnus asked, licking his lips with satisfaction.

"Y... Yes," Alec squeaked in reply - glancing from Magnus' mouth to his own feet, fighting either a blush or the want to share more kisses with the other teenager.

While he loved Alec's red cheeks, Magnus still hoped for the latter.

They didn't climb on their horses at first, walking next to them to warm up their muscles for a few minutes, and upon closer observation - alright, fine: intense contemplation of Alec's dazzling beauty - he realised that his boyfriend (fuck it) looked a bit upset. Concerned. Magnus quickly reviewed in his mind his words and actions when the young man had arrived with Eowyn: it all came down to an enthusiast kiss, on both sides, so... He hadn't actually done or said anything wrong, had he? Then why the long face?

"Is there something wrong?" he asked, a bit unsure.

"Yeah," Alec said quietly by his side, taking Magnus' hand in his own as if to assure his friend that he had not done anything bad - was he a mind reader? "Not... severely wrong but... You know..."

"No, I don't," Magnus whispered with kindness, squeezing his boy's hand to comfort him, to make him understand that he wanted to be there for Alec, that he would _be_ , no matter what he had to say, "Why don't you tell me?"

The other teenager nodded, bracing himself and glancing at Magnus timidly.

"Jace knows," he eventually mumbled, fumbling with his reins and making Eowyn shake her head a bit grumpily at the uneven pressure, until he patted her neck in a gentle apology.

Alec didn't say anything else, too focused on his mare, but Magnus didn't really need to hear more to understand the whole situation: the context and Alec's awkwardness were telltale enough. Still, he asked, just to be on the same page as his friend:

"Jace knows... about us?"

Us. What did these two letters mean, exactly? That they were friends, friends who were - maybe - working their way to boyfriends? Just friends? Friends with benefits of sorts? One boy in love and another one loving denial too much to admit he could possibly, potentially, just maybe like the first one a bit more than he let on?

"Yes," Alec squeaked out, "That."

"Right," Magnus sighed, "Okay. Um... How?"

Alec looked down, suddenly very interested in the sand beneath his feet that he started to stir with the point of his shoe in a nervous automatism. Curious, Horcrux did the same with his left hoof and Magnus' lips curled in an amused smile, that faded away when Alec's shy voice rose.

"I told him," he admitted with an apologetic little frown. "He came home earlier saying he'd heard rumours about you and I and..."

Alec trailed off, biting his lips. Magnus could perfectly imagine where the rumours came from: after all, they hadn't been that discreet when kissing in the hallway last Monday... Not subtle at all. He knew it would only be a question of time before a student, eager to get in Jace's good graces, told on them.

"Okay," Magnus said with a tiny smile. "So, he knows. But, uh... What does he know, exactly?"

What had Alec told him? What status had he given to their relationship in front of his brother? Also, was Jace going to punch him the next time they accidentally met? Magnus had always tried to avoid the blond as much as possible, even though confrontations were inevitable, in the end. He hadn't caught a glimpse of Jace since their last encounter at the café the previous week so he knew he couldn't do much longer without seeing him and... Well, he'd rather be prepared.

"I told him that we were... seeing each other," Alec said gently, his hope not to make Magnus freak out plain in his eyes. "Trying to figure things out."

"Okay," Magnus answered on the same tone, "And? How did he take it?"

This time, Alec heaved a deep, pained sigh, and his friend tried to stay calm. Of course Jace had not reacted well to the news... He could expect at least one punch, because Blondie would certainly blame him for corrupting his brother, or something of the like: trust Jace to find reasons to hate him even more. Already imagining the bruises that would mar his jaw once he'd cross the blond man's path, Magnus abruptly stopped thinking when Alec actually explained Jace's reaction, voice as soft as it sounded sad:

"He didn't believe me."

"I... I'm sorry?" Magnus stammered, taken aback.

"He laughed," his friend explained, scratching Eowyn's forehead to avoid looking into the other boy's eyes. "He said it couldn't be, that we were too different, that we had no business together, that..."

Alec shut up all of a sudden and Magnus didn't need to see his face, only his stiff shoulders, to understand that his friend was trying not to cry. Letting go of Horcrux's reins, trusting him to stay put and not roll in the sand with his saddle, Magnus slowly wrapped his arms around Alec's waist and pulled him close, allowing the young man to hide his face in the crook between his neck and his collarbone.

He didn't say anything but rubbed Alec's back in wide but slow, soothing circles, encouraging him to relax in his embrace, to forget about Jace's words. It had to hurt. Thinking that they were nothing but a joke, saying that they didn't belong together or that they _couldn't be_... Those were ideas that Magnus could perfectly imagine coming out of Maryse's and Robert's mouths, only on a slightly different topic: Alec's sexuality. To hear Jace, his brother and his best friend, voice the same kind of thoughts about _them_... Betrayal stung.

No matter how much Magnus wanted to comfort Alec with more than a hug and a touch on his back, he couldn't settle on the proper words to use, too scared of hurting the boy even more: what could he say that would make the situation more bearable? He wanted to tell Alec not to worry, that they were meant for each other no matter what Jace could say, but... Were they? Meant for each other? If Magnus couldn't say that he shared Alec's feelings, how could he possibly consider speaking of such matters?

He didn't make any comment. Only tightened his hold on Alec's body, feeling his distress in his own heart, wishing he could say the words that his friend wanted to hear so badly. But he wouldn't, not while he wasn't certain that he would fully mean them - it would only hurt Alec even more.

They stayed like that for a while, until Alec chuckled a bit weakly and stepped back, sniffling only once before he suggested that they actually got some work done. Magnus agreed to pretend that Alec had not just been crying in his arms, since it was obvious that the young man didn't want to dwell on it any longer, and he swiftly got on Horcrux's back, patting the horse's neck when he stayed perfectly still, patiently waiting for his rider's command to move forward.

They worked in silence at first, Alec doing his best to make it seem like he was fine, while Magnus did his best to focus instead of glancing at his friend every two minutes. In the end, they realised that they were both being a bit ridiculous and they quickly started to train together, giving each other a few pointers here and there. Magnus corrected Alec's posture, which tended to grow a bit too sloppy due to his liberty work for which, since he was riding without tack, he used his whole body to indicate directions and gaits, rocking his pelvis to speed up, leaning backwards to slow down, angling his chest and shoulders left and right to change course.

In turn, Alec advised Magnus on a better way to take sharp turns, reminding him of his mistake during the competition last week. He used his inside rein too much compared to the outside one, which caused imbalance and sent Horcrux just slightly off his way but still enough to lose points. With Alec's help though, Magnus combined the actions of his inside leg and outside rein and immediately realised that it worked better indeed, keeping Horcrux's shoulders perfectly aligned and improving both of their balances.

"We are so going to murder everyone else this weekend!" Magnus gloated when they were done, taking the saddles and bridles off to allow the horses to roll in the sand and groom each other. "Team Malec for the win!"

"Malec?" Alec echoed with mixed amusement and wonder.

"Magnus and Alec," the former explained with a giddy smile, "Hence _Malec_."

"I like it," Alec chuckled.

Magnus didn't turn to him with heart eyes. He did _not_. He also did not miss the pleased sparkles in Alec's own orbs and he realised, perhaps a bit belatedly, that maybe mixing up their names like this wasn't the best idea he could have had. His friends were already bugging him about a wedding date, he could not encourage Alec to entertain the same kind of thoughts now, could he?

"Kiss me," he said to cut short both his and Alec's trail of thoughts. "It's been too long."

The other teenager laughed at that, mumbling something that sounded like _it's barely been one hour and half_ between their lips as Magnus looped his arms around Alec's neck and pulled, bringing the boy's mouth to his own. They were sweaty, smelled like dust and horses, yet neither of them managed to feel self-conscious about that, too lost into each other: a hand tangling in short dark hair, another travelling down to the curve of Magnus' ass, caressing the back of his left thigh, hoisting him up until he could wrap both his legs around Alec's waist...

Alec, who was suddenly thrown off balance with Magnus' added weight and staggered, huffing between their mouths as he lost his footing, blindly extending his right arm to cushion their inevitable fall and protect Magnus' back as much as he could. They collapsed in the sand together, laughter sputtering from their lips before they kissed again, not even bothering to move.

The sand was not the most comfortable place to make out though, as the minuscule grains surreptitiously slipped between their pants and their briefs, under their shirts, beneath their fingernails, into their hair. Eventually, they stopped trying to get anywhere with their playful but heated kisses, what with the squeaks and giggles they let out every other minute, and they lay side by side in silence, bodies still shaking with repressed laughter from time to time, hands joined between them.

It hit Magnus, then, how easy it was, how simply good it felt. Spending time with Alec, laughing with him, being close both physically and emotionally...

"Can I ask you something?" Alec said, rolling on his side so that he could stare at Magnus, his soft voice adding to the peacefulness of this instant.

"You just did," Magnus pointed out, earning a roll of Alec's eyes for his trouble, "But feel free to ask something else."

In hindsight, it was a good thing that Magnus was already lying flat on the ground: if not, he would probably have collapsed after hearing Alec's next question.

"How do you feel about... sex?" the young man asked, his determined eyes set onto Magnus' but his cheeks turning a traitorous pink.

"Sex?" Magnus repeated, sounding as calm as he was internally freaking out. "What... What I think about... sex?"

"Yes," Alec confirmed, now looking everywhere but Magnus' way, "I mean, I... You know, after what happened the other day, I was wondering... How far you felt comfortable going? We agreed this was all about trying, right? So I... was wondering what you wanted to try. But also, possibly, what you've already tried?"

Magnus didn't want to admit that the colour of his own face probably matched that of Alec's. Yet, he could feel his cheeks burn at the evocation of the topic, realising that his friend was also implicitly asking whether or not he was a virgin. Goodness, he hoped the answer wouldn't disappoint...

"I've never been intimate with a boy before you," he blurted out before he could think more about it, "Is that alright?"

"It's not about it being alright or not," Alec shot back with wide eyes, "It's just about you. And me, I guess. So... No boy. Okay. So neither of us actually knows what we're doing... What about girls?"

Alec knew, Magnus realised, that he had dated Camille. He couldn't not know, for they had been quite popular at school, the both of them; rumours had spread too, a bit like whispers about him and Alec had travelled to Jace. It was probable that his friend also knew about their break-up, how Magnus had found out that the girl he was in love with was cheating on him, kissing other boys and allowing them in her bed eagerly, while Magnus was waiting, feeling like it wasn't the right time yet... Later, he'd realised that he had felt like something was off between Camille and him, that something didn't sit right with him, and that uneasiness had held him back. He was glad for it by now.

"Heavy making-out, bit of fondling, never the full deal," Magnus eventually answered, before his curiosity took the best of him, "You?"

"Never," Alec admitted without shame, "I never had the occasion, nor did I want to do it with someone el... I mean, with a random dude. But if I may be blunt..."

"I don't mind," Magnus immediately said, dying to know what Alec was about to say, why he looked so red, why he...

"I've had my fair share of vivid dreams," he confessed, interrupting Magnus' mental list of questions at the same time, before he added very slowly, "About you and me. And a bed, sometimes."

"Only sometimes?" Magnus repeated with a smirk.

"Yeah, only sometimes," Alec said, kissing the smug look away in what was actually a poorly-disguised attempt at keeping Magnus from seeing the dark blush on his cheeks. "Sometimes we're in a car. Or... We're doing it at my place, on the kitchen table. Sometimes we're not in any place I can recognise, there's only you. And your hands on my skin, your arms around me, your lips and your... Alright, I'll shut up now."

Magnus didn't think that he had ever seen the other teen look so embarrassed before and Alec avoided his gaze for a moment, breathing in deeply and slowly. He understood why when his eyes accidentally settled on Alec's crotch, where he could see a gentle bulge - not that he would judge, because _holy crap_ , hearing the young man talk about his dreams and what they were doing in those had not exactly left him unaffected either.

A shame that sand covered his hands, because this certainly felt like the right time to unbutton Alec's pants and touch him, cup him, taste him maybe, and make him feel good...

"Uh, so..." Magnus said, his voice a bit rough as he pushed dozens of dirty thoughts in a corner of his mind, "You... You've imagined us... together."

"Yes," Alec whispered shyly.

"And you..." he stammered, unable to string words together in a proper sentence, "Would you be okay with... with actually... Oh, for fuck's sake, do you want me?"

A raised eyebrow answered him, along with an _are you serious?_ look and a glance at his crotch. Magnus chuckled, a bit awed at the sudden realisation that Alec would definitely say yes if he asked him to join him in bed right then, that Alec desired him, that he wanted him and that he had even _waited_ for him. He hadn't missed the way the young man had struggled with his words to explain that he hadn't experienced anything before, that he had not been willing to try anything with someone who wasn't _Magnus_.

"I want you," Alec eventually said aloud, although softly, as if afraid of the consequences that the rest of their conversation could have. "The question is, do _you_ want me?"

There were so many layers to that specific question... Did Magnus crave Alec's body, did he want him as a whole, was he ready for more? Would he be able to share his bed and experience so far unknown pleasures with Alec, only to go back to being friends the next day, without allowing any sort of romantic affection to bloom between them? Could they be each other's first and then pretend, for Magnus' sake rather than Alec's, that they had not lived anything meaningful together?

Or... Could he surrender, give in to his unspoken desires? Would he like to wake up in Alec's bed in the morning, cuddle him, kiss his nose and that damn hot scar across his eyebrow, wear his boyfriend's shirt so that he could get up and prepare breakfast in the kitchen, or just go back to sleep, his nose buried into Alec's neck, his warm arms around his body?

"Yes," Magnus said, not even knowing which question he was answering anymore.

Just yes.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts with me, it's always a pleasure to know how you feel about this story. Take care of yourselves and until the next time! :)


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Thank you so much to all of you for the amazing feedback you've been giving to this story so far, this is a huge motivation for me! I hope you'll enjoy this chapter as well ;)

  


If one were to ask Magnus how he slept that night, he would turn bright red, cooked-lobster red actually, and splutter something about weird dreams that he could not remember - in truth though, he remembered them in all their glorious details. He blamed Alec for the kind of dreams that had haunted his mind throughout the night... Lovely ones, sexual ones, that had left him hard and aching in his bed, desperately alone.

He woke up with a start twenty minutes before the time his alarm was set on, panting, crotch burning with lustful desire, fingers twitching in their search for the body of Magnus' partner. Alec was not lying in bed with him though, his hands were not trailing up and down his body, teasing him, caressing the insides of his thighs, and his tongue was not, sadly, tangled with his own. Damned dreams.

Going back to sleep then would not be of much use, since twenty minutes were not long enough to provide Magnus with quality rest. Besides, he didn't reckon that he would manage to get any sleep even if he tried, not when he was shivering with remnants of want, skin on fire and cock twitching inside his pyjama pants.

Grumbling, Magnus chose to get out of bed and padded toward the bathroom as silently as he could, hoping that his parents would not wake up and find him in such an embarrassing state. He didn't take care of his not-so-small problem using his hand - not that touching himself while thinking of Alec was intimidating or would make him feel guilty, no. From what he'd understood, his friend had done the same anyway, so he didn't see it as a big deal. No, he just _really_ didn't want to disturb his parents' sleep with suspicious noises, breathy moans and dirty sounds that he wouldn't be able to quiet down. He had a wonderfully open and trusting relationship with his parents but they really didn't need to know that he was jerking off to thoughts of his boyfriend. Friend. Shit, not again!

Well, he might as well ignore this lapsus linguae once more and go back to his important business. Magnus took a shower, a cold, freezing one that had his muscles clench and relax consecutively as he tried to resist the urge to flee from the icy spray of water. At least it made his problem disappear quite quickly and then, he wrapped himself into the warmest and fluffiest towel he could find, body shivering and teeth chattering.

Once his skin wasn't as wet as when he'd hopped out of the shower, Magnus hurriedly strode back to his bedroom, holding the damp towel tight around him, and he rummaged through his wardrobe to find something decent to wear. Since school had started over and he'd begun hanging around with Alec during some of their five minutes breaks between classes, Magnus picked his clothes with just a bit extra care, eager to look good for the other boy. Logically, he knew that he didn't need to seduce him, Alec was already in love with him, but... Well, it didn't hurt to make an effort, did it? Not to mention that he liked to observe the joyous spark in Alec's eyes whenever he caught sight of Magnus.

Making this spark turn into a gleam of lustful interest was slowly climbing its way up to Magnus' number one priority - okay, he was going with top five, just so he didn't sound too thirsty - and therefore, he happily chose dark, tight pants that clung to his lovely butt just fine. He added a nice shirt that he usually reserved for grand occasions and styled his hair like he normally did, taking his sweet time to do so... But even when he was done, he was still in advance on his morning schedule.

When he woke up at the usual hour and not twenty minutes ahead, he either had breakfast with his parents in the kitchen or munched on a fruit while helping them feed the horses, depending on whether Zachariah and Jeremiah or the Bane's were in charge of it that day.

On this fine and early morning though, while he could have visited Bill and offered him half of his banana to enjoy his extra free time, Magnus sat at his desk, pushed away a chemistry textbook and a few pencils, then he ripped off a blank page from the closest notebook he could find in the messy chaos all over the wooden surface. Maybe he should clean up a little... Maybe. Another day. Because he had something really important to do _right this instant_.

At this very second, he just felt obligated to listen to Ragnor's wise ideas and write the list his friend had suggested that he made. And why not, after all? He would have to face the truth, one day or another... A truth he already knew, deep down, but allowing himself to acknowledge it with solid proofs to back it up would certainly give better results.

So Magnus started to write, first a title - he was an organised person, mind you. _Reasons to like Alec_. That was a good start, although he knew he was slightly altering the reality: if he had to find one, a possible alternative title would turn into _Reasons to love Alec_. Which was way too forward. Right?

Magnus drew a straight line across the sheet of paper, obtaining two columns above which he wrote a _+_ on the left and a _‒_ on the right, carefully circling both symbols. All he had left to do now was to fill these two blank spaces with what he liked and disliked about Alec.

He started with the easy and obvious: on the plus side, Alec was hot. Very much so: beautiful eyes, cheekbones that blushed in an endearing way, which in turn made his long eyelashes flutter as he blinked in embarrassment. Had Magnus mentioned the boy's lips already?

Oh, there, the second reason! Good kisser. Fantastic kisser even, considering that Magnus was the first boy, the first person that Alec had kissed - a thought that didn't fail to make his traitorous heart skip a beat every time. Alec kissed with his whole body, not just with his mouth: his hands were always touching him, clutching onto his hips to push them together, caressing his lower back, bringing him closer, and there had been that glorious moment when Alec's fingers had followed the curve of his ass and grabbed his thigh...

Magnus took a deep breath and stopped himself before he needed another shower. So, good kisser. If Alec made love like he kissed... Stop, stop, stop. No more thinking. Only writing. Preferably a reason to dislike the boy, just so he could focus on something less pleasant than Alec's deft fingers on his bare skin. Goodness.

Alright: they used to be enemies. Sort of. Not really, if he took the time to think about it hard for a second. Circumstances and misunderstandings had turned them on each other but really, Magnus had more beef with Jace than he did with Alec. Still... What if they dated, for real and properly this time, only to realise that they didn't work out as boyfriends? What if they went back to their previous situation? They had been enemies once, nothing would be easier than becoming enemies again.

He was afraid. What he had with Alec right then was sweet and made him happy (look, two more reasons to love the boy!) but the thought that he could fail, fail Alec and himself both, was terrifying. He didn't want to upgrade their relation only to understand that he was going to end up just like he had after Camille. That he wouldn't make Alec happy enough.

But... It didn't solely depend on him. Alec had a role to play in their relationship as well, be it just friendship or something more romantic, so maybe he could swallow back his fears and trust Alec to steer them both in a good direction.

Because he trusted Alec wholeheartedly, something that he quickly added in the plus column. In the other one, he wrote Jace's name, for all the reasons he already knew that Blondie would pose a problem, eventually. Jace hadn't understood Alec when he'd tried to tell him that they were together, not to mention that he hated Magnus' guts - and vice versa, of course. On top of that, they would have to deal with the Lightwood parents one day or another, a prospect that definitively didn't fill Magnus with joy.

On a more positive note, Alec was smart. Thoughtful, too, always making sure that Magnus was comfortable when they were together, both on a physical and a mental level. He remembered how the young man had apologised when he had breached the topic of parenthood, how he had wanted to make sure that Magnus didn't mind discussing it.

Alec was also an amazing rider, a man who truly understood and cared for the horses, a man who _knew_ them. Magnus admired him and his sense of the horse, as well as the way Eowyn looked whenever he was near, truly happy and excited at the thought of working with her rider.

He also appreciated the boy's determination, his loyalty, his honesty, and little things really, the way Alec would shyly smile at him, how his hazel eyes would light up whenever he saw something that he liked or that surprised him... The way he carried his physics textbook, as if it was going to bite him, the way he was growing more and more confident around Magnus, going from an awkward boy afraid to scare his crush away to a boy who kissed him against the wall and told him about his wet dreams...

A topic that Magnus should really, really avoid this morning, no matter how gratifying it was to even think that Alec pictured them together.

Before he could get too excited about it though, Magnus added one last positive comment in the column on the left, the fact that his friends liked Alec and were already supportive of their tentative relationship. He didn't have to fear anything on that side, only on Alec's side actually, with Jace and their parents... And that was when he realised that all the notes in the column on the right were never actually about Alec, only his family.

The potential problems were not his fault, he would never be responsible for his family's mindset. The right part of the sheet of paper was useless: what was there not to like about Alec? Nothing. Oh, he certainly had his little quirks and flaws, but big reasons that could put a stop to their story? No. Alec was _Alec_ and that, in itself, was reason enough to love h...

Holy shit.

Magnus felt terribly stupid, suddenly. His brain had finally broken down and thought the one word he had fought so hard, too hard, to avoid. He had all the reasons in the world to love a boy as sweet as Alec, with his kind soul and his bright eyes, but saying it aloud and admitting it? Totally different business. While lying to himself about it, he could still pretend that he didn't have to do anything about it. Awareness was a different process though, with different consequences as well.

He knew that he could not keep it to himself, not on the long term anyway: Magnus would lose Alec if he did so. But wasn't he also going to lose Alec if he told him that he shared his feelings, only to fail the boy in the end and make him unhappy? What should he do? He knew how important it was for Alec to hear that Magnus liked him too but... Wouldn't it seem silly to blurt it all out now, when he had not given the other boy any sign before? He didn't want Alec to think that he had changed his mind only for his sake. Should he wait before discussing that serious matter with him?

Magnus got to his feet in an instant, sheet of paper crumpled in his right fist while he fumbled for his phone with the left, deadly set on calling Doctor Love. Catarina would know what to do, she would be able to calm him down with only a few words so that he didn't just scream everything from the rooftop; she would keep him from freaking out and bottling up every single feeling he had in his little heart until both Alec and he were two old men.

Magnus walked out of his bedroom in a daze and headed for the stairs, intending to join his parents that he could now hear in the kitchen, probably making their awfully strong coffee to get them through the day. He dialled Cat's number and glued his phone to his ear, anxiously waiting for her to pick up, eyes still set on the sheet of paper in his hand, rereading his own handwriting and believing more and more in his own feelings with every word he read.

Until his awed concentration lost him: Magnus missed a step in the middle of the staircase and fell forward with a yelp, flailing to catch his balance, only to end up slipping even more until he collapsed on the floor, at the bottom of the stairs. Something cracked.

"Magnus!" he heard his mom cry out, her voice strangely distant, distorted, as his ears buzzed and his brain registered intense pain; he managed to feel a hand, strong but gentle, afraid to hurt him, on his shoulder. _Dad_ , he thought, before he promptly passed out.

  


  


Magnus didn't remember falling asleep but he had to agree that he had, at some point, when he opened his eyes and found himself in unusual surroundings that his sleepy brain associated with a hospital as quickly as it could. White room, white walls, the pungent smell of ether... It didn't take a genius to figure it out.

He blinked a few times, trying to recall what had happened, until it slowly came back to him. List, love, Cat, stairs, _ouch_. Oh. Okay, time to assess the damage? Carefully, Magnus squirmed a little on the mattress he was lying on and immediately noticed two things: first, moving was hard on his head and second, there was resistance around his right feet, that he couldn't move. Well, except for his toes that he managed to wiggle but that wasn't exactly useful.

His head snapped up - again, _ouch_ \- when the door of the hospital room opened and Magnus was glad to see his father stand on the threshold.

"Magnus!" he breathed out, and his son was grateful for his dad's gentle voice, not sure that he could have taken a louder volume, "You are awake. How do you feel?"

"Not..." Magnus started, coughing a little, "Not too good. Water?"

Tenderness flashed across Jimmy's features and the man came closer, sitting on the edge of the mattress to lean over his son and push back a few strands of hair.

"Sorry," he said, "The nurse said you couldn't drink nor eat anything until two hours after waking up. Your stomach could be a bit upset in the aftermath of the anaesthesia."

Magnus groaned, resigning himself to two more hours of dry throat and rough voice. Great.

"You remember what happened?" his father asked.

"Yeah," Magnus answered. "Fell in the stairs. How bad is it?"

"Less than it could have been," Jimmy announced, relief clear in his eyes, "You didn't hit your head, so that was reassuring. But... Well, broken ankle, sprained wrist. It could have been worse."

"Can I ride?" Magnus enquired in worry, already thinking of the competition on Saturday.

"No, sorry, honey," Jimmy answered as he squeezed his son's hand in comfort, knowing how important it was for him to ride with Alec that day. "Not with that ankle."

Magnus didn't make any comment, processing the news. He could barely focus on his father's next words, about his mom who was grabbing two disgusting hospital coffees for the both of them, about his discharge, planned for the middle of the afternoon if he recovered from the anaesthesia without trouble. Magnus couldn't pay too much attention to these news, not when his mind was still stuck on the fact that he had to give up on Saturday's challenge.

He didn't want to see Alec's face once he'd tell him about it, he could already imagine his disappointment but also, mostly, his concern. Speaking of Alec, Magnus was suddenly reminded of a tiny detail.

"Dad?" he called, "Have you... have you found a list? After I fell?"

"Yes," Jimmy answered with a tiny smile, obviously fighting his amusement, "We saw the title, no more, I promise. We didn't read it, since it looked so... private. Now, if you want to tell us something, you know we're..."

"Yeah," Magnus interrupted his father with a dark blush - that he totally blamed on the after-effects of the anaesthesia. "Well. Aren't you going to say _I told you so_?"

"Nope," his dad said, not even bothering to hide anything anymore, "I'm happy for you."

"I haven't told him yet..."

"Obviously," Jimmy said with a roll of his eyes, "but that's okay. You'll figure it out, eventually. Take the time you need, I don't think Alec's going anywhere, not without you."

Magnus could only marvel at his father's wisdom and the hope his words kindled in his heart. He and Alec were young, barely eighteen, and they had the right to take their time. Magnus' feelings for the young man since he'd found out that Alec wasn't the asshole he'd assumed him to be had grown into something deeper than the mere friendship Magnus had been aiming for at the beginning, and he hadn't see it coming, hadn't even understood at first...

But now, he had found the proper word to describe them. However, he didn't want to tell Alec too fast. He didn't want him to think that it was too sudden, too soon after Magnus had denied to entertain any remotely romantic feeling for him; he didn't want Alec to doubt that he meant it. So if he had to wait to be convincing, he would. He just hoped that he would have the occasion to tell him soon: Alec didn't deserve to be kept in the dark for too long either. So, long enough to ensure that the boy would believe him but not as long as to make Alec despair. Why was nothing ever simple?

Magnus flinched when the door opened for the second time, shaking him out of his thoughts, and he flashed a tired smile to his mother when she entered the room and kissed his forehead. It made a strange impression on him. Her lips were soft, careful not to put too much pressure on his head, but that gentleness didn't manage to hide a deeper, more intense feeling: relief. He didn't dare imagine how his parents must have felt, seeing their only son unconscious on the floor of their house, not knowing what the damages would be.

"There's someone here to see you," Anna told him once she'd made sure that Magnus was as alright as he could be, given the circumstances.

Her son didn't have the time to ask who had come to visit, because his parents smiled at him and left the room together, promising to be just there in the hallway if he needed anything, and they allowed his visitor in.

"Hi," Alec said, leaving the door ajar behind him before he came to sit next to Magnus with the slightest hint of hesitation.

"Hey," he answered with a soft smile, "Did my parents call you?"

If they had, it would be saying a lot about how transparent and obvious he was about his feelings for the Lightwood boy, but Alec blushed and Magnus' brows arched up in wonder.

"Uh... Not really? I... I was worried when I didn't see you at school, you weren't answering your phone, your friends didn't know where you were... I might have called my mom, who called yours, who told me what had happened."

"I could have been skipping classes," Magnus pointed out, "And you would have betrayed me."

"You don't skip classes," Alec snorted - and he had no right to be so cute while doing so.

"How do you know that?" Magnus shot back, still smiling, "Did you stalk me?"

He didn't actually think that his friend would turn even redder than before but when Alec did, his expression turned curious - and, to be honest, a little bit concerned.

"Did you?" he repeated.

"No," Alec said, shaking his head, "Come on, I never stalked you. But... You know, I fell in love with you when we were eleven."

"Eleven?" Magnus echoed faintly, "You never told me that."

He had known that Alec's love for him wasn't new, but he had never imagined that it went so many years back. Goodness. How had Alec been so discreet and subtle, so much that no one, not even Jace, had noticed anything? How much, how long had he suffered from that love that he thought unrequited?

"I do now," Alec said, reaching out to caress Magnus' hand, the one with the bruised, swollen, bandaged wrist.

He was gentle and his fingertips were cool on Magnus' skin, soothing the dim pain he could feel pulsing through his arm now that the after-effects of the anaesthesia were wearing off. The hospital bed felt uncomfortable as hell but he wouldn't have wished to be anywhere else, enjoying Alec's kind attentions way too much for that.

"So," the young man said, clearing his throat and staring at Magnus with lines of laughter around his eyes, "Eleven. When everyone's a bit stupid, especially when you're in love, when you try to know as much as you can about people you like... I swear I never stalked you but I did look at you... A lot. I couldn't take my eyes off of you, you were so..."

Alec gestured vaguely towards Magnus, who felt his cheeks grow hot. To think that he could be loved so deeply by someone... He could feel his heart melt: Alec was too pure.

"So I watched you," the latter said, before he quickly added, "At school. Not like... You know. And so, I learned a few things about you... The more I learned, the closer I felt to you and the happiest I was, even though you never looked at me with anything else than hatred in your eyes."

"I'm sorry," Magnus mumbled, ashamed.

"Don't worry about that. We talked about it already."

He nodded, covering Alec's hand with his good one, relishing into the sensation of the boy's skin under his own. It felt good, to share a moment of silence but still being joined, connected, in some way.

"I can't ride on Saturday," Magnus eventually said, breaking the comfortable silence, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Alec whispered, pecking his friend's lips. "It's not your fault. I'm glad you're alive."

"It wasn't so bad," Magnus protested, in spite of his love for dramatics, "It's just a broken ankle. And a sprained wrist, granted, but..."

"But I was terrified when the first words I heard after I asked about you were _he's in the hospital_ ," Alec interrupted him calmly. "Yeah, it could have been worse, but... Knowing that you were hurt was awful."

"Sorry," Magnus said again, only to catch Alec's pointed look. "Fine, no more _I'm sorry_ 's! Maybe you should kiss me, just so I can't say sorry again."

That was a wonderful, marvellous, fantastic idea. Magnus was suddenly reminded of his thought earlier that day, that Alec was an amazing kisser, and he had one more proof of that right there and then. He would not be surprised if a nurse burst into the room in panic, for his heart was beating fast and his breath had become a bit (a lot) ragged by the time Alec released him, teeth gently pulling on his lower lip before he let go completely.

Alec didn't stop there, although his next kisses were much slower and prudent, since he took Magnus' bruised wrist in his hands to pepper it with light touches of his lips, kissing the inside of his wrist through the bandage, trailing his mouth along his fingers, kissing his knuckles, his fingertips.

"Don't make me horny in a hospital bed," Magnus groaned after a little while, when the warmth from Alec's mouth stirred a completely different reaction from him.

"Can't resist me, uh?" Alec joked, grinning, only to blush when Magnus answered.

"No, I can't."

Not anymore.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Feel free to comment and share your thoughts, I love to read what you think of this! Until next time!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Shadowhunters is back and I couldn't be happier to get fresh Malec material! I hope you enjoyed the premiere! You definitely seemed to enjoy the previous chapter of this story as well, so I hope you'll like this one too! Thank you for the constant support, you all rock! Enjoy this chapter ;)

  


Living with crutches was hell. Magnus had never thought so before, since he'd been lucky enough not to break his foot in his first seventeen years of life but now, however, he realised how annoying it actually was. Which was a lot. He had left the hospital on Thursday afternoon like planned, escorted by a nurse to explain how to walk with these awful (but practical, he had to admit it) sticks while sparing his bad wrist: the bandages that kept it straight helped to support his weight as he walked but he couldn't strain it any more.

Alec had hovered like the worried boyfriend he (almost) was, watching him stumble clumsily toward his parents' car and ready to steady him at the smallest unbalanced step. Jimmy and Anna had offered to take him home since they were headed in the same direction anyway, and Alec had gladly accepted, thanking the Bane's over and over again.

Magnus hadn't minded either. Seated on the backseat of the car, hand in hand, the boys had not said much, in spite of being included in Jimmy's and Anna's conversation, but they had glanced at each other with oddly shy smiles, maybe because it felt weird to be holding hands in front of his parents... It was a good sort of weird, though.

It almost felt like they were official and had the support of their families. Well, Magnus' family. He knew that he had nothing to fear from his parents, who were happy to see him so freaking ecstatic. Maryse and Robert, however... They would probably not like to learn that their son's homosexuality wasn't just a phase.

Alec had gone back home to do his homework after that, a shame really, since Magnus' parents invited him to stay for dinner, but he declined.

"I would love to," he told Magnus before he left, his hand lingering on his friend's cheek as they stood outside, among the flowers in the small garden at the front of the house. "But I promised my parents to be there. We're trying to... function like a normal family. So, dinner, all six of us."

Alec hadn't said more but his facial expression had been enough for Magnus to understand that the young man didn't exactly believe in a positive outcome.

"What about your parents?" Magnus had asked, "Are they... better?"

"Depends," Alec had mumbled with a shrug, "You remember the night Ilmarë was born? My parents were at a restaurant in town. They used to go out a lot, when they were younger, so I guess they wanted to try, for old times' sake. It's... not ideal but they're trying their best. I think we should, too."

By _we_ , Alec meant Jace, Izzy and he, who had suffered the most from Robert's and Maryse's fights over the years and resented them for it. Max was lucky to be much younger than his siblings, who took care of him whenever their parents couldn't and didn't feel their absence too much, thanks to his older brothers and sister.

"Okay," Magnus had told Alec, before giving him a sweet, comforting kiss. "Good luck, then."

He had watched Alec as he left, shoulders hunched in apprehension for the upcoming dinner with his parents. Magnus had stewed in his concern for Alec during the whole evening, hoping that he wasn't the victim of negative comments from Maryse and Robert, until his own parents had told him to go to bed. He truly needed his rest, after such an eventful day, and as soon as his head hit the pillow, he was asleep.

Still, when he woke up on Friday morning, he felt like he had not slept at all, eyes dry and sight blurry, brain sluggish and totally unprepared for school.

"You can stay home if you don't feel good enough," Anna suggested, "School can wait until Monday."

"But I missed yesterday's class," her son objected, wondering why he was even bothering when other students would have cried tears of joy at being allowed to skip a full school day.

"Are you sure?" she asked, biting her lip when Magnus nodded, "Fine. But promise me to call if you feel too tired, okay?"

Magnus promised, hugged his mother and then, it was settled. Raphael picked him up and acted almost worse than Anna, observing him from all sides with a frown, his disgruntled eyes stopping briefly over his bandaged wrist and his foot that he could not put down.

"I'm fine," Magnus said then, hoping to lighten the mood - truthfully though, he feared that Raphael would start crying.

"Don't do that again, ever," his friend shot back, on a gruff tone that was mostly there to hide how much he cared. "We almost had a heart attack when your dad called Ragnor and told him what happened to you. We wanted to come and see you yesterday night but your parents said you were already asleep."

"I went to bed early," Magnus confirmed. "Eventful day, all that..."

"Try not to have this kind of eventful days too often," Raphael groaned, "One in a lifetime is enough. Now shut up and give me your bag."

Living with crutches was hell but there were slight advantages to it as well, as it turned out. Raphael almost didn't let go of Magnus' bag for the whole day, except to transfer it into Ragnor's waiting hands when he was the one sharing his classes with Magnus; Catarina told them that they were ridiculous, although helpful, even though she was acting like a mother hen almost just as much as the two boys. She carried Magnus' cafeteria tray and even bought him a cookie with extra chocolate, when she usually didn't miss an occasion to remind him to eat more vegetables than baked goods. Cookies were pretty tame, though.

"Don't get used to it," she warned as he smiled at her in gratitude.

"Wouldn't dream of it," Magnus answered around a mouthful of chocolate - paradise, heaven on earth, perfection made biscuit, the epitome of feeling good, that chocolate taste warming him up from inside...

"Are you moaning?" Ragnor asked all of a sudden, interrupting Magnus' degustation quite rudely.

The young man opened his eyes, a bit surprised to realise that he'd closed them before, and he blinked at his friend. But... Was he? Moaning, that was? He wouldn't put it past himself, chocolate was just that good. Nothing could ever top that, except probably (definitely) Alec. Now, if he could get Alec naked with chocolate all over his body, all for Magnus' pleasure... Holy shit.

Of course Alec had to materialise out of thin air in front of Magnus' eyes at the same instant.

"Hey," he greeted them all, taking the time to lean across the table to casually place a kiss on his friend's lips before he asked him, "What is this all about? Are you moaning? Without me?"

Raphael choked on his sip of water and Ragnor (un)helpfully slapped his back several times in a row to ensure that he'd stay alive. Catarina was grinning, wiggling her brows at Magnus who was gaping at the Lightwood boy. Shit. Why had Alec said that? It gave him too many ideas and he just couldn't be seen sporting a boner around school!

"Don't say anything else, Alec," Ragnor said, "You might break Raphael."

"I'm fine," the latter growled.

"Sorry," Alec commented with a small, bashful smile, "It just... slipped. I was actually here to ask you something, Magnus..."

"Yeah?" he perked up, "What?"

"I was wondering if you'd like to... go on a date with me?" the young man asked, a bit hesitantly. "After school, today?"

Stunned, Magnus gaped again. A date? An actual, boyfriend to boyfriend, date? He heard someone, probably Raphael, snicker at his dumbfounded expression but when he turned his head, his three friends were busy pretending that they weren't listening to his conversation with Alec. Who awaited a reply.

"You... Don't you have to practice?" he asked the other teen, unable to answer in this instant for fear of screaming an overexcited _yes_ and scaring Alec away, "With Eowyn? You know that you don't have to stop training just because I can't, right?"

Alec heaved a small sigh, probably mistaking Magnus' stalling for reluctance to go on that date with him, and he said:

"I know, don't worry. But I usually don't practice the day right before a competition, so that she can save her energy. So... Look, it's okay if you don't want to go, I'll just..."

"Are you kidding?" Magnus blurted out. "Of course I'll go with you!"

The smile that lit up Alec's entire face almost made Magnus slap himself for taking that extra time to respond, aware that his friend had no idea that his feelings had evolved: as far as Alec knew, Magnus was still only humouring him by agreeing to be with him.

"Really?" Alec exclaimed, "Great! Wait for me after school then?"

"Promise," Magnus purred before he pushed on his uninjured leg to half-stand and kiss Alec deeply - which had Ragnor pretending to retch, the asshole.

After that, the day seemed to be excruciatingly slow to Magnus, who was fidgeting and squirming in his seat, focusing on his upcoming date with Alec rather than his classes. Swinging on his crutches, he went out of the building as quickly as he could without risking to fall down when the bell rang the end of his last class and he looked around for Alec, whose height made easy to spot even from afar, so Magnus smiled - _like an idiot in love_ , Raphael grumbled to Catarina, who just told him that he was jealous - and headed for the young man.

Alec took his bag for him and slowed down his strides to accommodate Magnus' snail pace as they walked side by side, Alec's hand twitching from time to time as if he wanted to grab his own, only to remember that the crutches would make it impossible. Magnus followed his (boy)friend a few blocks down the school, imagining that they would get hot chocolate at the coffee shop that most students frequented after school hours to relax, already a bit disappointed that they weren't going somewhere more... Well. Intimate? Magnus didn't want to keep looking behind his shoulder to make sure that Jace wasn't there to see them. After what he'd told his brother, Magnus didn't feel like giving him any occasion to make other mean comments.

To his greatest surprise, Alec passed the coffee shop without doing as much as glancing at it, clearly not interested in this popular location among the students. Instead, he led Magnus a bit farther away from the school neighbourhood, until they arrived in front of an ice-cream parlour.

"I hope you like ice-cream," Alec said, suddenly worried as he realised that he hadn't even wondered before asking Magnus out, "They also have sorbet and frozen yoghurt but if you want to go somewhere else..."

"Don't fret," Magnus interrupted him with a kiss on his cheek before Alec could work himself into a frenzy, "I love ice-cream."

Shoulders relaxing, Alec smiled and opened the door for him, and Magnus absolutely didn't giggle as he stepped inside the parlour. His gaze immediately zeroed in on the ice-creams on display and he licked his lips, almost missing the arrival of a middle-aged lady.

"Alexander!" she exclaimed with clear joy, "It's good to see you again!"

"Hi Mrs Dunbar," Alec answered, smiling, and Magnus' heart skipped a beat.

"Alexander?" he echoed, taken aback, "You never told me that was your full name!"

"It never came up!" the other boy defended himself, "You've always known me as Alec, I wasn't going to introduce myself again..."

"You could have," Magnus said with a shrug, "given our history."

Alec... No, wait, not Alec: Alexander. Magnus was only ever going to call him that from then on, that name was too beautiful for him to satisfy himself with _Alec_. Alexander's expression soured and he mumbled:

"I didn't want to make it more obvious that we didn't get along at first..."

"Understandable," Magnus agreed, before his attention switched to the ice-creams again. "So... What are you having? I don't think I can choose..."

"Take your time," Mrs Dunbar reassured him with a wink, "I'll serve Alexander first."

Mrs Dunbar turned out to be an old acquaintance of Alexander's, who used to come there for ice-cream when he was a little boy and who now treated Max as often as he could. She knew all about his tastes in ice-cream and his favourite flavours, so she made fast work of assembling a monster of hazelnut, speculoos and dark chocolate scoops. It suited Alexander, Magnus mused, for these flavours were warm, comforting, bursting in sparks of well-being on the tongue. He ended up choosing something a bit more extravagant and fruity: grapefruit sorbet with raspberry and red cherry - with whipped cream on top because why the hell not?

It made for a solid half-hour of tasteful delight as they sat at a table in the parlour, where Magnus tried to keep his moans in check: it would not do to sound like he was having an orgasm, not when two other couples and a family with two children were sitting around them. It didn't mean, however, that Magnus couldn't express his happiness in other ways... Licking his sorbet with half-lidded eyes and a blissful expression on his face made Alexander choke on his speculoos and he let out a pitiful whimper.

"Magnus!" he half-hissed, half-begged, "Not in public!"

"I'm not doing anything!" he protested, wounded, with falsely innocent eyes.

Alexander grumbled, keeping his gaze firmly set on his own ice-cream so that he wouldn't have to see Magnus' suggestive smiles, but he got his revenge when his foot crawled up his friend's leg under the table, teasing at the crook of his knee and the inside of his thigh. Damn those long legs of his! Alexander, the rascal, would even be able to reach his crotch if he bothered to extend his leg just a bit more and then... He was the devil, no matter that he was blushing a bit as he played with him, unbeknownst to dear Mrs Dunbar...

"I will not be held responsible for my next actions if you don't stop right now," Magnus warned him, squirming a little on his chair, "Alexander, I swear to..."

"Alexander?" he repeated with a smile, "What happened to _Alec_?"

Magnus rolled his eyes. He wished he hadn't asked that question because really, wouldn't that make him look thirsty?

"It's hot," he merely explained, before he smirked and amended, "You're hot."

It worked wonders, because Alexander all but ducked behind his huge ice-cream again. Goodness. Magnus loved that shy, handsome and golden-hearted dork. Really, he should have seen it coming... He should have realised earlier that he wasn't going to resist such an adorable human being.

"Have you seen yourself?" Alexander asked, bashful and his cheeks still slightly pink, when he dared look up again. "You are..."

Using all his eloquence skills, Alexander gestured at him with a desperate look on his face that made Magnus chuckle, but then he caught his friend's hand in his own and laid them on the table, fingers joined.

"I'm pretty handsome, I know," he joked, before he added very seriously, "And you are literally perfect. Not just... Hot or handsome or... You see, you have everything good and beautiful right there."

Magnus freed his hand in order to point at Alexander's chest, above his heart, fingertip touching the light fabric of his flannel. He imagined that if he rested his palm open on that special spot, he would feel the echoing beat of his heart, steady and calm, and couldn't help but remember that a part of this gentle heart beat for him.

"I don't deserve you," he said quietly, yet not enough that Alexander missed it.

"Stop," he told him with a little frown, "I'm old enough to know who deserves me or doesn't. Now quit talking and eat your ice-cream, or I'll have to do it myself."

Magnus quickly put his tongue to good use as he kept his sorbet from melting and dripping onto the table, catching the renewed blush high on Alexander's cheeks; he didn't think he would ever tire of seeing that endearing pink face. They eventually managed to finish both their ice-creams and Alexander suggested that Magnus came back home with him. It was an innocent proposition, for the young man told him that he had to prepare Eowyn for the show the next day, hence ruling out all other, dirtier activities: a thorough cleaning of both the mare and the tack, not to forget the plaits in her mane, could take a long time to get over with. Besides, Alexander would need to rest and go to bed early for a good performance on the next day - and Magnus was dying to see how his friend and his mare would do.

"You know," the Lightwood boy told him while he was carefully hopping around Eowyn and brushing her coat, "You don't have to come tomorrow if you think that it would be too hard on you. It's not an obligation."

"Hard on me?" Magnus repeated, a bit confused. "Using the crutches is not that tiring. Annoying, yeah, but not trying."

"I didn't mean it like that," Alexander said, hesitating a bit, "But... You were supposed to be competing with me. With Horcrux. If it's too painful to be there without actually riding... You don't have to come just for me."

Once more, these caring words left Magnus completely speechless. He had no idea how Alexander could be so thoughtful all the time... Because he was right, not being able to ride or even take Bill for a short hike in the forest would put a damper on his days for as long as he wouldn't be allowed to get his ass back on a horse. He didn't consider it a good reason enough to give up on Alexander, though.

"I'll be there," he promised, planting a firm kiss on his friend's mouth - he still tasted like hazelnut and chocolate and really, how wonderful was that? "You just wait, I'll cheer for you so loud you'll be embarrassed to even have me as your boyfriend!"

Magnus only realised what word he had used when he caught Alexander's eyebrows going up, up, up, eyes wide and mouth slack, but he quickly recovered and tried to downplay it, suddenly focusing on Eowyn's dusty flanks. The young man recognised that behaviour as what it was: a way for Alexander to protect his heart in case Magnus had blurted the word out without meaning it, while still making it seem like it was no big deal, all of it for Magnus' sake.

"So, uh..." the young man mumbled without looking away from Eowyn's body, "You're my boyfriend now?"

"Maybe," Magnus answered on the same tone, suddenly growing shyer than he had ever felt. "If you want me to?"

"You mean it?" Alexander cautiously asked, careful not to answer Magnus' question too quickly, not before knowing for sure that he and his friend were properly understanding each other.

And Magnus realised that, realised how painful it would be for Alexander to think that perhaps their unofficial relation was growing into something realer, more genuine, only to have all his hopes shot by a negative answer.

"Yes," he replied, voice steady, allowing a smile to curl at his lips. "I want to be your boyfriend. I want to date you, for real this time."

Magnus squeaked when Alexander wrapped his arms around his waist and lifted him up, spinning him around once or twice as he let out a happy laugh and made a rain of light kisses fall on his face. He squeaked, he giggled under the assault of love, and he probably sounded like an idiot too, but frankly, he didn't care: Alexander was his boyfriend. Now, he only had to tell the young man how he truly felt about him... Soon, he would say it. He didn't think that he had it in him to wait for much longer anyway, Alexander was just... irresistible.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading so far! Feel free to share all thoughts and opinions in the comments ;)
> 
> Just for your information, there won't be an update next week: a friend of mine is in a bad situation right now and I will focus on her to make sure she's as alright as can be, and I'm also giving a lecture for my PhD next Saturday, which means I'll really, really have to prepare for it during the next week. I'm also taking part in a horse show on Easter Monday (you'll probably get pics of that on my Instagram account, there's a link in my profile if you're interested!) so if I'm not dead from exhaustion by then, you'll get the next update in two weeks... Until then, take care of yourselves ;)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there! As you can see, I didn't die from exhaustion during the last week, so that's great! Thank you all for your support, both to my friend, for my lecture and my horse show! Pics will soon come on my Instagram account if you're interested (link in profile!) We are slowly getting to the end of this story, I hope you'll enjoy this chapter!

  


Competition mornings were always fast-paced and stress-inducing moments: check the tack one last time, make sure the plaits in the horses' manes hadn't gotten ruined during the night, redo the wayward ones that _had_ , make sure that the boots were shiny, the white pants perfectly white - why were white pants mandatory anyway? It was awfully hard to keep clean when you spent your day on a horse, risking to fall in the sand (or the mud, depending on the weather) and stood for the major part of the day next to animals with a tendency to be dusty.

Magnus was glad that he didn't have to get through that stress this morning, although maybe he was just saying that in order not to focus on the twinge in his chest at the thought that he should have been riding that Saturday. Well, at least he hadn't been forced to wake in the ungodly hours of the morning: he had been able to get out of his bed at seven, immediately thinking about Alexander who'd certainly woken up at five - or something like that.

Once he'd eaten breakfast with his parents and showered, he sent a text to his boyfriend - giggling like an idiot at the thought - to let him know that they would soon be on their way, only to see Alexander's name flash across his screen barely two minutes later.

"Hey," he greeted him when he answered the call, doing nothing at all to fight his grin or hide his merry tone. "How's my champion doing?"

"Not well," Alexander answered, sounding dejected and worried, "Are you on the road already?"

"Not yet, no," Magnus said distractedly, picking up on the sadness in his boyfriend's voice, "Alexander, what's wrong?"

"Don't come," he answered, "I'm not competing. There was a dog on the loose when we arrived and I was taking Eowyn out of the horse trailer when... The dog came out of nowhere. It bit her in the leg."

"Shit!" Magnus exclaimed, attracting his parents' attention and concerned glances, so he put his boyfriend on speaker to let them hear the rest, "Is she alright?"

"Yeah, sort of... The vet said it's nothing too severe, she might be limping for a few days but it shouldn't get more serious than that. I can't ride her for a while, she needs to rest and I have to keep the bite clean so that it doesn't get infected."

"Okay..." Magnus breathed out, comforted by the somewhat good news, "Okay. What will you do for today?"

"Nothing," Alexander said, probably shrugging in defeat. "I won't have the time to come back to the ranch and get another horse ready... I wouldn't even know which one to ride, I didn't train any of the other horses and not even Dandy is prepared for today's competition since Jace wasn't planning on riding..."

A name popped into Magnus' mind as he listened to his lover and he suddenly grinned.

"Stay where you are," he enjoined him, "I'll bring you a horse. We'll be there in no time!"

Magnus caught his father mouthing a name at him and he raised his free hand, turning his thumb up, and Jimmy strode across the living-room to walk out and get to the stables, completely on board with his son's plan.

"What?" Alexander said on the phone, taken aback, "Magnus, what... I don't understand. Which horse are you thinking of bringing?"

"Easy," Magnus answered, absolutely delighted by his own idea, "Horcrux."

Of course Alexander protested. He did so for the whole time Magnus was on the road with his parents, Horcrux in tow. The horse looked perfectly content to be going somewhere and even happier to arrive when, half an hour later, Anna parked the car and Jimmy got Horcrux out of the trailer, Magnus and his crutches being completely useless to help them in any way.

"Magnus," Alexander said as soon as he met with the Banes, "You know that I love you, but you're crazy! I can't compete with Horcrux!"

"Why not?" the young man answered, brows raised, before he kissed his boyfriend.

Alexander spluttered, torn between pushing into Magnus' space to crash their lips together for a little while longer and keeping on protesting. The latter eventually won over the former, although the Lightwood rested his hands on Magnus' hips to keep him close. The thumb catching on the hem of his t-shirt and slipping underneath to caress his waist was absolutely not driving him insane.

"W... Well," Alexander stammered, trying to collect his thoughts, "First of all... I don't know! I just... I've never ridden Horcrux before!"

"But you've seen me practice," Magnus shot back with a smile. "You know how I ride, you know Horcrux's quirks and what's hard for him. You'll be fine."

"But," Alexander protested again, looking a bit panicked, "It's so... intimate! I mean, a horse is the reflection of their rider's work! What if I do something wrong or..."

Magnus agreed with his boyfriend: sharing a horse _was_ something incredibly intimate - as well as intimidating. Horcrux was his horse, his little baby, no matter how big he actually was, and the young man knew that, should Alexander ever propose him that he rode Eowyn, he would freak out as well, scared to make a mistake and ruin his boyfriend's hard work. However, he didn't feel reluctant to hand Horcrux over to Alexander.

Magnus adjusted his grip on his right crutch and put the left one against his hip, trying to keep it stable as he lifted his free but injured hand and cupped his boyfriend's cheek to kiss him.

"I trust you," he whispered against his lips. "I know the way you work with horses and I know you'll be amazing with Horcrux."

Alexander blushed at that and really, Magnus should have seen it coming: the slightest compliment and boom, he was a walking tomato. He loved it. Eventually, the young man nodded and accepted Magnus' offer, although he made him promise to stay around to coach him before he went into the arena for the competition itself.

And then, once the small, insignificant detail of whether or not Alexander would ride Horcrux was settled, they were in for a rush in order to be ready. They had cleaned Eowyn thoroughly the previous day, after their lovely ice-cream date, and plaited her mane, while Horcrux... Well. Jimmy and Anna took care of brushing the dust off his coat while Alexander and Magnus took care of his messy mane, trying to be as quick as possible. Thankfully, Horcrux was an angel and stayed perfectly still while they did all of that.

As they worked, all four of them, Magnus wondered if Alexander was alone: his parents were nowhere in sight, neither were his siblings. The thought that Maryse and Robert wanted him to compete, yet weren't even there to watch their eldest broke his heart.

"Mom and Izzy went home with Eowyn but they should be back soon," Alexander answered when Magnus timidly asked, unwilling to twist the knife in the wound any further. "Dad is home with Max, taking care of homework, and Jace is... around..."

Alexander fidgeted a little, glancing at Magnus, who realised what his boyfriend meant. Jace had probably made himself scarce once he'd heard that Magnus would be there and he could perfectly imagine him scoff, refusing to be anywhere near the Bane boy. Well, fuck him. How could Clary put up with him? It was beyond all understanding, Jace was just... unbearable. Maybe he had hidden qualities - super well hidden, even - and Magnus would not dare to doubt it, since Alexander was his brother: after all, he, Izzy and Max had turned out fine. Maryse and Robert had probably done something right with their kids after all - hopefully with all of them, blood or not blood.

Just like Alexander thought, Maryse and Isabelle managed to make it back just in time, a few minutes before it was his turn to compete. He was trotting in the arena when they reappeared, Magnus hobbling in the middle of the sand to follow Alexander's movements and give him a few directions. He couldn't help but laugh in the beginning, when his boyfriend first climbed on Horcrux's back and didn't dare do anything, merely walking around, barely even touching his reins.

"Relax!" Magnus told him between snorts of laughter, "He won't do anything to you!"

Horcrux looked confused, unable to understand why the young man on his back wasn't asking him much, even growing nervous, thinking that maybe he didn't manage to read his rider's indications.

"He needs to know you're there with him," Magnus gently explained, "Don't worry, just go for it!"

After just a bit more clumsy fumbling, Alexander managed to relax enough to establish a proper connection between Horcrux and him, and Magnus smiled as he left the arena, certain that they didn't really need him anymore. He came to stand beside Izzy, smiling hesitantly at Maryse, who returned his smile with less cheerfulness - but then again, Maryse had never been the most expressive person. Maybe it didn't have anything to do with her son's relationship with him... If she was even aware of it: Alexander didn't look like he would share much with his mother, not when she wasn't exactly supportive of him, his sexuality and his work with his horse.

"Thank you," she said anyway, "For allowing Alec to compete with your horse. That's very kind of you, especially considering the circumstances."

"Circumstances?" Magnus repeated, eyebrows rising.

"You never liked each other," Maryse explained, looking at him as if he was insane.

Oh, right. So she didn't know about the most recent developments... It wasn't surprising. She didn't seem like she listened much to her children anyway, even when they tried to tell her something: if she did, Alexander certainly wouldn't be entering competitions anymore.

"We became friends," Magnus told her, choosing to hide the truth for now, since it wasn't his place to tell his boyfriend's mother that they were dating.

Isabelle snorted at his answer but Magnus pointedly ignored her, setting his eyes on Alexander whose number had just been called. There weren't that many riders competing that day and, if one asked Magnus, none of them was as good as his boyfriend - and he wasn't even biased, okay? Still, it showed that Alexander was not riding his own horse and wasn't used to Horcrux, hence slight delays between his demands and the horse's reactions.

Maryse grumbled inaudible words at some point as she watched her son, face creased in a frown, but Magnus couldn't find anything to blame Alexander for. He was mesmerised, wide eyes following his boyfriend's subtle actions and the way his long, slender body moved along with Horcrux, delicate fingers vibrating on the reins, gentle wrists turning left and right, legs discreetly encouraging the young horse forward. He was elegant, he looked happy, lips upturned in a smile, positively gorgeous, and he was all Magnus'.

Izzy and Magnus applauded as soon as Alexander stopped, followed by Maryse who still looked a bit dissatisfied, and the young man caught sight of Jace across the arena, on the other side of the fence. As much as he hated him, Magnus was glad that Blondie had been there to support his brother and judging by Alexander's grin when he saw Jace, he guessed that he felt happy about it as well.

Alexander ended up sixth out of thirty-seven riders, a very honourable result, that Maryse criticised as soon as her son dismounted: she approached him, looking rather annoyed, while he was patting Horcrux's neck and cooed at him softly. Magnus and Isabelle shared a worried glance before speeding up to catch up with the rider and his mother, foreseeing trouble.

"You were so great, Alec!" Izzy exclaimed before Maryse could say anything.

It didn't last though, because she quickly retorted with that icy tone of hers:

"But you could have done better."

Bam. Magnus' eyes widened at that and he didn't miss the subtle flinch from his boyfriend, nor the way he briefly looked down and bit his lip. He didn't understand: sure, Alexander hadn't made it into the top three but... He had done an amazing job with a horse he didn't know that well. Was Maryse completely unable to see it or was she just pushing Alexander to his limits until he got first?

"I think you handled Horcrux pretty well," Magnus said to reassure him, quite loudly at that, before he added in a whisper, "And I really want to kiss you right now."

He murmured it and anxiously waited for Alexander to decide whether or not he was willing to display their relationship in front of his mother, but it turned out that Magnus had nothing to worry about: giving the reins to Izzy, his boyfriend engulfed him in a tight hug and pressed their bodies together to make it easier to kiss him. Alexander wouldn't be sated with a peck, Maryse around or not, so he captured his mouth in a victory kiss, bold lips caressing, teasing, opening to deepen their embrace, uncaring of his mother's gasp and Isabelle's chuckles. Magnus couldn't think about their audience much either, too busy enjoying the light brushes and harsher touches of their lips.

When they parted, idiotic smiles plastered on their faces, Maryse looked as white as a sheet and for a second, Magnus feared that she would say or do something brash, but fortunately Anna and Jimmy came up to them at this instant. Parental instinct?

"Congratulations, Alec!" Anna exclaimed, pulling the boy in a brief hug while Jimmy clapped his shoulder with a proud and delighted smile, "Good job!"

Alexander stammered his thanks, looking at Magnus' parents in awe - understandably so: his own mother hadn't praised him for his performance so he hadn't expected Jimmy and Anna to do what Maryse had failed to. She looked pissed, which the Bane's easily noticed, so they carefully suggested that they drove Horcrux back to the ranch with Alec and Magnus, while Maryse brought Jace and Izzy back. Isabelle was quick to agree, eager to get her brother and her mother as far away from each other as possible, and Magnus motioned Alexander to follow him back to the horse trailer.

Together, they took off the saddle and bridle and dedicated a bit of their time to massaging Horcrux's legs with a gel that would prevent them from swelling after his effort. He obediently stepped into the trailer when Jimmy led him inside and happily munched on the hay Alexander had prepared for him so that he wouldn't get bored during the journey.

"Are you alright, sweetheart?" Anna asked when the boys settled on the backseat, huddling together and joining hands.

It took several seconds for Alexander to realise that she was addressing him and not her son, and a few more to understand that Anna was referring to what had happened with Maryse. Taken aback at the unexpected concern and lovely nickname, the young man blushed and stammered:

"Y... Yes. I'm... used to it."

"You shouldn't be," Jimmy said sternly, although it was clear that his repressed anger wasn't directed to the boy but rather to his mother. "You did very well with a horse you had never worked with before. Maryse should be proud of you."

"Thank you," Alexander answered, smiling when Magnus squeezed his hand.

They didn't let the mood get too depressing after that: Jimmy turned the radio on and they all sang along the tunes as Anna drove all the way to the ranch, and Alexander laughed so hard at Magnus' horrendous rendition of _Bad moon rising_ that he cried. That was how he wanted to see his boyfriend: happy and loved, surrounded by supportive people, and if he had to cry, then he wanted those tears to be the salty result of joy or any other positive emotion - and nothing else.

Back at the ranch, Magnus' parents went straight to the kitchen to prepare a few sandwiches so that they could get lunch together, the four of them, and Alexander spluttered his thanks with wide eyes.

"Your parents are so kind," he said while he got Horcrux out of the trailer, Magnus standing aside on his crutches.

"Is it too much?" he asked, unwilling to make his boyfriend uncomfortable with too much friendliness coming from Anna and Jimmy.

"Not at all," Alexander quickly answered, "It's a nice change from the atmosphere back home. I like it."

"You're welcome here anytime," Magnus said, opening the door to Horcrux's stall. "Whenever it gets too hard for you... My parents won't mind."

Nodding instead of saying anything, Alexander kissed him softly, conveying both his gratitude and his love through the unhurried press of their lips.

"I'll put Horcrux's equipment back into the tack room," he said against his mouth when they eventually stopped kissing. "I'll be right back."

Magnus shamelessly watched him leave, staring at his ass nicely shaped by the tight pants, until Horcrux snorted.

"What?" Magnus scoffed, "Don't act like you don't sniff every mare you meet in the pasture, you hypocrite."

Unimpressed, Horcrux drew his attention back to the hay and the carrots Zachariah had put in his manger, and Magnus carefully deposited his crutches into a corner of the stall before he climbed on a small stool to undo his horse's plaits. He knew that Horcrux wouldn't move as long as he was eating, so he guessed he was safe. His wrist didn't hurt as much as before and he would probably be allowed to take off the bandages in a few days... His ankle was a whole other matter though.

Magnus perked up when he heard Alexander's voice, assuming that he was speaking with one of his parents, until he caught the second person's voice and stiffened. What the hell was Jace doing there?

"... a good job," Jace was saying, and Magnus relaxed, thinking that Blondie was congratulating his brother like he deserved, until he heard his next words. "That was clever. Was it actually all this was about? Seducing Bane and earning his trust so he would let you ride his horse? Do you think he'll let you do it again and get higher rankings?"

"Jace..."

Magnus' fist tightened on the plait he'd been about to untie, his heart breaking a little at Jace's words but mostly at Alexander's reaction - or lack thereof. Blondie was accusing his brother to... to have betrayed Magnus, implying that he had gotten closer to him with the unique purpose of riding the Banes' horses to succeed in competitions. What, because Eowyn worked better at liberty and couldn't get the Lightwoods the glory they wanted?

"No, seriously, Alec!" Jace exclaimed, laughter in his tone, "How did you do it? He hates our guts. Did you fuck him? Was he any good?"

Magnus froze. In his mind, the almost same words echoed, cold just like Jace's, but hurled by a girl's voice. His first heartbreak. It felt like it was happening all over again and Magnus couldn't stand to stay there, couldn't bear to hear any more of these hurtful words. Heart torn apart, he didn't think much, only realised that he needed to get out of there, go somewhere he wouldn't have to listen to Jace spitting his venom. And the way to do that was just in front of him, peacefully eating carrots.

Pushing on the stool with his good foot, Magnus straddled Horcrux's back and grabbed the lead rope that he had put around his neck, quickly tying it to both sides of the halter. Whirling his horse around and out of the stall, Magnus leaned forward, realising just a bit too late that he was crying and blindly directing Horcrux - who eventually took off on his own, sensing his rider's distress, and galloped through the stables, storming out and eliciting two cries of surprise.

"Magnus!" Alec shouted, taking one look at his boyfriend and realising at once that he'd heard everything, "Magnus, wait!"

He didn't want to stop. Didn't even want to talk to Alexander right then, too hurt, too scared and too angry to stay. He pressed his legs against Horcrux to make him go faster, uncaring of where his horse was taking him: he just needed to leave.

Horcrux galloped away, heading for the familiar path through the forest, and Magnus never heard Alec's next words as he turned towards Jace, who looked stunned, and said on a tone as cold as ice:

"Fuck you."

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yoohoo~ I'll try to update the next chapter quickly so that I don't leave you hanging on ^^ Feel free to share your thoughts and ideas regarding the way this situation is going to evolve! Thank you for reading :)


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! You're not dreaming, the next chapter is here already! I couldn't leave you with that cliffhanger for long now, could I? I hope you'll enjoy this chapter ;)

  


Horcrux slowed down to a gentle trot when he burst into the clearing in the forest, used to take a break there whenever he went out with his rider. The young horse stopped completely when Magnus didn't give him any other direction and lowered his head to graze and walk at his own pace, while his rider bit his lips, fighting tears at the dim pain in both his ankle and his wrist.

He was so stupid. Of course the doctor had a reason to forbid him from riding so soon after his accident and he understood why: Horcrux's fast gallop had sent tiny but painful shocks up and down his body with every stride and now, he felt as if he'd been hit by a truck. He didn't think that he had done much damage because the pain was not that sharp and he didn't feel like he was about to pass out so... It wasn't that bad, right? He was just sore.

His heart was actually more bruised than his body. Jace's words rang painfully in his head, bringing back Camille's own hurtful words. _You aren't good enough for me_. It had awoken his worst fear, the one he had kept in a corner of his mind as soon as Alexander and he had started dating, maybe even from the first time his boyfriend had mentioned his feelings for him.

These were true and Magnus believed in them, even after what he'd heard in the stables. For a fleeting second, he had nearly given in and trusted Jace's words - but Jace didn't know Alexander as well as he thought, he didn't know the love that existed between them, wasn't even aware that his own brother was in love with his archenemy.

Teetering on the edge of certainty, Magnus had eventually gathered his thoughts and realised that he didn't - couldn't - believe a word of what Jace was saying. No, Alexander had not seduced him for the sake of competition results. Yes, he had earned his trust, but only because he was a good person with a golden heart and eyes that spoke of love and kindness. There wasn't an ounce of deceit in Alexander.

It just hurt that he hadn't said anything to defend their relationship, to defend _him_.

Horcrux suddenly looked up, startling Magnus, who then heard the distinct rumbling of hooves tramping the ground. He braced himself, knowing who was coming his way and what kind of conversation they would need to have... Still, when Alexander appeared in the clearing, mounted on a horse that Magnus identified as Dandy, Jace's gelding, he felt his chest swell with contentment and relief: despite everything, Alexander had come for him.

"Magnus!" the young man exclaimed when he caught up to him, jumping down his horse without even caring to land lightly on his feet.

Alec looked frantic, his wide eyes reflecting panic and pure distress as he approached Horcrux, patting his neck carefully before he lifted his head and stared at Magnus.

"Are you hurt?" he immediately asked, anxious, making an aborted gesture to take his boyfriend's wrist and examine it himself - but then he froze and waited, uncertain that Magnus would welcome his touch after what had transpired.

"It's fine," Magnus mumbled, "It doesn't really hurt. I think... I think I need to get down, though."

"May I help?" Alexander asked, awfully cautious not to look like he didn't think that Magnus could do it on his own - newsflash: he couldn't - and it brought him back two weeks prior.

Two weeks before the day's events, he hated Alec as much as Jace and hadn't believed him when he'd spoken about his feelings. Alexander had been careful then, careful not to crowd him, careful not to be too close, and seeing him fall back onto these habits as if he didn't dare to assume that everything that had happened between them in the past two weeks mattered anymore... Magnus hated it.

Lifting his right foot to swing it above Horcrux's neck, Magnus slowly sat with both his legs on the same side and leaned forward until he could rest his hands on his boyfriend's shoulders.

"Help much appreciated," he whispered with a small smile.

Alexander answered in kind, although his own smile looked a bit too sad and his eyes were filled with regret. Still, the young man put his hands under Magnus' thighs and hoisted him up, then pulled him flush against his hard chest so that the injured boy could wrap his legs around his waist and keep himself stable, comfortably balanced as he tightened the hold of his arms around Alexander's neck.

They stayed like that in silence, forehead against forehead, both of them enjoying the peace while it lasted, not quite ready to talk about more important matters... That were inevitable to discuss anyway. They couldn't _not_ exchange a few words as they stood there, unmoving, hearts beating fast.

"I'm so sorry," Alexander said after a while, voice thick with fearful emotions, and Magnus sighed.

"Put me down," he mumbled, "I can't talk like this."

His boyfriend nodded, carefully bending down so that Magnus could sit on the grass: he had left his crutches in Horcrux's stall and Alexander knew that he wouldn't be able to remain standing for long. So, after Magnus had comfortably settled down on the grass, the other boy tied Dandy's reins together to keep him from stepping on them and he plopped down in front of Magnus, anxiety troubling his gorgeous face.

A short, uncomfortable silence echoed for a moment.

"Why?" Magnus finally whispered, staring into Alexander's eyes. "I understand why Jace would say these words but you..."

"I didn't say anything like he did!" Alexander immediately protested, not waiting for a full sentence before trying to make things right, to show Magnus that he was not like his brother at all.

"I... I know," Magnus answered, voice calm in spite of the hurt still bubbling in his heart, rising in his throat, making it hard to speak. "But you... you didn't say _anything_. At all."

He didn't say it, because he didn't want to blame Alexander any further, but his boyfriend's silence had hurt almost more than Jace's words. Logically, he knew that Alexander didn't share any of his brother's thoughts about him but... Not saying anything was a way of agreeing, wasn't it?

"Magnus..." Alec whispered, reaching out to hold his hands, thumbs drawing circles across his fingers, "Do you remember that day at my place? When you said that you were sorry for not... listening when I was trying to defend you and make Jace shut up?"

The young man nodded, recalling the afternoon they had spent in the barn, when they had shared their first kiss... He remembered their apologies and indeed, he'd said sorry for not realising that Alexander had been trying, for so long, to show Jace a better way. He hadn't listened, maybe hadn't wanted to, too blinded by his hatred for Jace to pay attention to Alexander's efforts to... Oh crap.

"I... I did it again, didn't I?"

His boyfriend nodded.

"I didn't think you would hear any of it," Alexander admitted, "So I thought it would be better to let him speak, wait until he was done, and then make a few things clear. Like how much I love you. How serious I am about you. I... I'm sorry if you thought that I didn't care or... that I agreed with him. Please, Magnus, tell me you didn't think that, I..."

"I didn't," Magnus replied, looking down at their joined hands. "Well, maybe for a few seconds but... I know you."

Alexander breathed out, suddenly relieved, and his fingers tightened just a little bit around Magnus'.

"Good," he whispered, unshed tears in his eyes, "Good. When you ran away I thought..."

He trailed off, vestiges of the fear he'd felt watching Magnus leave him behind still present in his voice. The other cupped his cheek, trembling fingers caressing his skin that the speed of his race to find Magnus had turned a dusky pink.

"No," Magnus said gently, "I wasn't running away from you. Not really. I just... needed to get away from Jace."

"I'm so sorry for everything he said," Alexander told him, sounding almost desperate in his eagerness to let Magnus know that he didn't mean any of it. "I'm sorry he hurt you once again."

The young man shook his head slowly: Alexander didn't have to apologise on behalf of his brother. Jace needed to pull his head out of his ass and finally realise and take responsibility for all the pain he'd caused Magnus - and Alec, who had been hurt as well when Blondie had refused to take him seriously about their relationship.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Magnus declared, "I mean it."

"But Jace..."

"Your brother's failure at behaving like a decent human being is not on you," he answered quickly, before Alexander could convince himself that he was somehow responsible for his sibling's inappropriate words and attitude.

"It doesn't change the fact that he hurt you," his boyfriend finished weakly, shoulders sagging in sorrow.

Magnus drew in a sharp breath. Alexander was right and yet, it wasn't the whole truth, Jace's words weren't the only reason he'd felt such intense pain in his heart: completely and blissfully unaware of it, Jace had sent him back a few years prior, to the first time his heart had been stamped on. The first time he'd thought that relationships would never end well for him... And maybe it was time that he told Alexander.

"You want to know what hurt the most?" Magnus asked quietly, although he didn't wait for an answer: he _had_ to talk to his boyfriend about it. "Someone told me before that I wasn't good enough for them and that I would never make them happy. I'm scared that I won't make you happy either but... You deserve it, Alexander, so much! You deserve someone who will make you happy."

"Magnus..." the other started to protest, only to be gently interrupted.

"You know about Camille and I, right?"

"Y... Yes," Alexander whispered hesitantly, clearly uncomfortable with the topic.

Magnus could understand why: his boyfriend was treading foreign waters there, not knowing how to handle ex talks - not that he knew much about that himself: Camille was his only ex.

"She cheated on me," he explained, not surprised to see Alexander nodding as if he knew about it already: news of their breakup had travelled around school and even teachers had heard about it. "She told me I wasn't good enough to make her happy, so she'd had to find her happiness with someone else. She made it sound like it was my fault."

At the time, Magnus had been devastated. Now, anger mostly remained, because he had realised that Camille had manipulated him and he had learned from some of her previous boyfriends that he hadn't been the only one she had cheated on. Logically, he knew that he shouldn't pay any attention to her words and yet, the damage had been done.

"I'm not like her," Alexander stated with determination.

"I kn..."

"I mean it, Magnus," the young man said, voice firm, "I'm not her and _we_ are not what you and her used to be. You have nothing to worry about. I want this. I want _you_. So maybe there are hard times ahead of us but... You and I, we can figure it out."

What was Magnus supposed to say or do in front of so much confidence? He was glad that Alexander had enough of that for the both of them, so he nodded, a bit dumbly, a bit dazed too by the fact that someone as wonderful as Alexander Lightwood wanted him in his life, so much that he promised without a hind of hesitation to make it through future hardships.

Some people said _We'll cross that bridge when we get to it_. Not him. Alexander was already telling him that the bridge wouldn't slow them down, that he was certain of his future at Magnus' side.

The thought made Magnus surge forward, carefully moving to his knees to get closer to his boyfriend and grab him by his shirt to bring their lips together. He threw everything in that kiss, his still unspoken love for Alexander, his trust, his knowledge that the boy wasn't responsible for his brother's words, his wish for forgiveness for the brief doubt he had experienced. And Alexander welcomed him with open arms and an open heart: sighing in content into their kiss, he wrapped his arms around Magnus' waist and gently pulled him forward, eager to feel him closer and closer.

Magnus lost his balance though and what Alec had wanted to be a tight embrace ended up with him flat on his back in the grass while Magnus yelped and fell forward, flush against Alexander.

"You okay?" the young man asked, gentle hands brushing Magnus' hair away.

"Y... Yeah," he answered, breathless, aware of every inch of their bodies touching, "Perfect. Kiss me."

"Your wish is my command," Alexander answered, before he cupped Magnus' neck and brought him down.

His lips laid a thousand lazy kisses across Magnus' face, avoiding his mouth until his boyfriend let out a sound of frustration and finally, he kissed him properly. There, held in Alexander's arms, Magnus felt himself falling in love all over again, wondering for a second or two how he had ever denied to have such feelings for him. How had Alexander managed not to go mad in front of so much stubbornness?

Magnus didn't care about the answer in this instant, not when soft lips were caressing his own, and even less when two hands sneaked under his t-shirt and started to slide up and down his back, fingertips tracing strange and random patterns on his skin, making him shiver and jerk forward. He felt way too hot. It didn't help that Alexander bent and spread his legs to give him more room, allowing Magnus to settle between his thighs and _move_.

It wasn't the first time they found themselves in that very situation - and he hoped it wouldn't be the last - but something was different. A good different. They were both more eager, almost hungry for each other, flares of desire now unrepressed, their hands exploring their bodies under their clothes. Alexander's warm skin was soft beneath his palm, his stomach clenching with every curious caress - but he could feel himself tremble too, every time his boyfriend's wandering fingers came closer to the waistband of his jeans. He was dying to feel them slip underneath and grab his ass to make him move faster, harder and...

And Magnus whined when these wonderful hands suddenly vanished, their warmth no longer touching his back.

"Why did you stop?" he groaned, his hips freezing against Alexander's - but he could feel him, straining against the restraint of his trousers, desire obvious, heady, intoxicating.

"Because we both know where this is headed," his boyfriend answered with a dazzling smile, one that made Magnus want to kiss him again, until his breathing was ragged, until he couldn't speak such awfully long sentences anymore.

"So?" Magnus mumbled, before a sudden thought nearly scared him off Alexander's lap. "You don't want to? It's okay if you're not ready, I'm sorry if I..."

A quick kiss made him shut up and he went all cross-eyed when his boyfriend tapped his nose, still smiling.

"Believe me, I want to," he said. "But I also want a bed. We already got each other off in this clearing once and I don't want to make love to you here. Not in front of the kids."

He pointed at Horcrux and Dandy who were looking at them curiously and Magnus hiccupped as he laughed, collapsing next to his boyfriend in a fit of giggles.

"K... kids!" he wheezed, only to nearly choke when Alexander rolled to his side and reached out to slowly caress his stomach.

"I'm serious though," he whispered, staring into Magnus' eyes, looking as if he would willingly drown in them, "I want to be in a bed for our first time. Besides, you're hurt... A bed would be more comfortable."

Alexander had a point, and a good one at that. Even though technically, Magnus didn't need to use his foot much during sexy times and privately thought that his boyfriend shouldn't worry like that, he couldn't deny that a comfy mattress would win over a grassy, muddy forest ground any time. Their backs would thank them later.

"Fine," Magnus agreed, staring up at the canopy in despair, "Now let me die of frustration."

Alec snorted and stood up, hands quickly wiping the grass away from his pants, then he bent down to tug on Magnus' good hand.

"I was thinking we could go back to your place, actually," he said, laughing when Magnus sighed and sat up. "Your parents are probably looking for us, I'm sure they've made lunch by now."

"I'm starving," Magnus suddenly realised, proceeding to make grabby hands at his boyfriend. "You're right, we should go back immediately. Help me up? Please?"

Just like before, Alexander held him in his arms and carried him toward Horcrux, who watched them approach with wonder in his eyes. Magnus straddled his horse, patting his neck as he didn't move but patiently waited for his injured rider to settle comfortably.

"Promise me you won't take off like that again," Alexander said once Dandy and Horcrux started walking side by side, "I don't want you to hurt yourself any more."

"Promise," Magnus answered immediately. "Doctors know best, that much I'll remember."

"Please, also try to remember that I love you," his boyfriend shot back with a smile, even though he wasn't joking.

Magnus leaned toward him and kissed his cheek, aware of how serious Alexander was: the young man didn't want him to doubt his love, ever, not when Jace was being an ass, not when Maryse frowned upon them, not when Magnus' own fears and insecurities threatened to break him.

"Promise," he repeated, which seemed to appease Alec.

They rode in silence after that, listening to the calm rhythm of the horse's hooves, so different from the stormy pace of both Magnus and Alec on their way to the clearing. One was as peaceful as their hearts right now, the other as confused as their minds had been. Now though, the clouds had gone away and Magnus believed in his love for Alexander more than ever.

"How do you feel about a movie night at my place?" Alec asked once they'd arrived at the ranch.

He had put Dandy in an empty stall for the time being, planning on taking him back to his own place after lunch, and he helped Magnus dismount and handed him his crutches as he asked his question.

"Is that what you call it?" Magnus asked back, grinning and waggling his eyebrows, "Will we be in a _bed_ , by any chance?"

Alec rolled his eyes, although he was smiling as well.

"We can start with a movie," he amended. "Then... See what we're in the mood for. Which could be nothing at all, or just sleep. I don't mind either way."

"What about your family?" Magnus asked, unwilling to say yes to something that could put his boyfriend in trouble.

"Izzy and Max will leave us alone but they'll probably fangirl over us," Alexander warned him. "As for my parents and Jace... I don't care what they think anymore."

"Then count me in," Magnus answered, "I'll bring the popcorn."

He really, really looked forward to spend the evening with Alexander, no matter what they would end up actually doing: he didn't exactly care, as long as he could spend time with his boyfriend. He was so far gone it wasn't even funny anymore.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! As always, feel free to share your thoughts, it's always a delight knowing what you think! Until next time!


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! At last, a new chapter! Sorry for the delay, horses kept me busy all weekend... I'm exhausted x) I hope you will like this long-awaited chapter!

  


Balancing himself on his right crutch, Magnus rang the bell of the Lightwoods' front door and felt his heart rate pick up as he waited for someone to open the door for him - he prayed for Alexander. Or Izzy, even Max, but he really didn't want to be awkwardly invited in (or told to fuck off, he guessed) by his boyfriend's parents or Jace.

Hanging from the crook of his arm, a plastic bag contained the promised Tupperware of popcorn as well as a bottle of Spanish wine Jimmy swore tasted amazing, a peace-offering for Maryse and Robert so that, hopefully, they wouldn't kick him out as soon as he came into their house. Magnus didn't think they would go that far though... The tranquillity of the neighbourhood depended on it.

Also, in his jeans back pocket, two condoms. Anna had given him the first one a few minutes after he'd announced that he would stay at Alec's that night and she had told him that it was _just in case_. Even though they hadn't discussed it first, his mom and his dad had had the same idea: two minutes before he walked out the door, Jimmy had slipped the second condom in his hand, whispering in his ear to _have fun and be safe_.

Magnus loved his parents.

Now, being ready didn't mean that Alexander and he would get down to it as soon as he crossed the threshold: maybe they would explore a little, Magnus was totally okay with that, but... He didn't really want to go far if his boyfriend's family was there too. It would be extremely embarrassing. Inhibiting. Awkward. He didn't want Maryse Lightwood to know what his moans sounded like.

Magnus startled when the front door was pulled open but he relaxed as soon as he saw the gorgeous, breathtaking man on the other side. Alexander looked positively ravishing, his hair still a bit wet from the shower he'd so obviously taken, white shirt with rolled-up sleeves tucked in black pants. Goodness, Magnus loved these rolled sleeves, displaying tan forearms and hugging his boyfriend's biceps. Alexander looked like sex on legs - and Magnus should really stop drooling and say hi.

"I love your shirt," he blurted out instead, unable to take his eyes off of his boyfriend's chest.

"You do?" Alec answered with a shy laugh, "Izzy chose it. I think she bought it one size smaller though, and she probably did that on purpose."

"Bless," Magnus whispered, still a bit mesmerised, until he remembered his manners - mostly - and handed over the popcorn and the wine. "The bottle's for your parents."

"Thanks. Come in," Alec said, smiling wide as he jerked his head to the side, gesturing to the living-room.

Magnus followed his boyfriend inside the house, looking around in search of Alexander's siblings and parents, but no one was waiting for him in any of the rooms and the place was silent, safe for soft music that he could hear, coming from upstairs.

"Jace is out with Clary," Alec explained when he met Magnus' curious gaze, before he blushed a little. "And my parents aren't here. When I told Izzy that you were coming over, she... She decided to take Max and our parents to the movies. So that we could be... You know... On our own."

Magnus felt his heart beat a bit faster at his boyfriend's explanation, knowing exactly what Izzy had implied by that. Laughing, he mentally sent his thanks her way and then he couldn't resist teasing Alexander a bit, eager to make him blush harder.

"So, we are alone..." he whispered with a smirk, coming closer to his boyfriend with what he hoped was a sexy gait - as much as his crutches allowed that, meaning not much at all.

Oh well. Alexander loved him anyway.

"Yes we are," he answered on the same low tone, amusement flickering in his eyes, "So we won't be disturbed during the movie."

Magnus' laughter bubbled out of his throat and he nodded with a smile, relaxed and glad that there wasn't any pressure to do _something_. As if he'd read his mind, his boyfriend added:

"I meant what I said earlier... The movie was the actual idea, everything else is just bonus."

"I know," Magnus said, patting Alec's shoulder, "A movie sounds great. What did you have in mind?"

It turned out that Alexander had a lot of ideas, not only about which movies they could watch together but also about setting the right mood. As he slowly climbed up the stairs and entered for the first time in his boyfriend's bedroom, Magnus found out that the music he could hear downstairs came from a playlist set on Alec's laptop, resting on a desk where textbooks piled up, among endless pictures of horses: Jace and Dandy next to Izzy and a horse that he didn't know, Max with a Shetland pony, Eowyn of course, more Eowyn, and a picture of a younger Alexander holding a cup during what had to be his first win in a competition. The palomino pony he was riding looked way too cute.

Besides the soft music, Alec had also drawn the curtains to plunge the room in darkness but he had turned on a paper lamp in the corner by his bed, still allowing a dim and gentle light into the room. On the bed sheets, a tray with two glasses and bottles of juice and lemonade was waiting for them, and Magnus added his popcorn to it.

"There's ice-cream in the kitchen, if you want," Alexander suggested, bringing his laptop to the bed.

"I'll stick to popcorn for now," Magnus answered before he settled on the mattress, squirming until he was comfortable, and he patted the spot next to him.

It didn't take long for his boyfriend to join him, pressing their thighs together, and he grabbed a pile of DVD's that he'd set on the floor to allow Magnus to choose. Alexander had picked out a good selection, fantasy, rom-com and action movies alike, and Magnus actually had a hard time to decide. He voted against the _Lord of the Rings_ because he didn't want to cry in front of Alexander - the scene where the fellowship got to the bridge in Moria inevitably opened the dams, so no - and in the end, he went for _What's your number?_ that he had actually never seen.

Magnus never got to watch the ending scene.

Neither of the boys stopped squirming while they watched the movie: one minute they were both lying on their stomach, the next they were sitting back up, only to twist and fidget and get in each other's arms, until finally, finally! they found the right position. Magnus ended up sitting between Alec's spread legs, his back to his chest, and he surprised himself thinking that he didn't want to move ever again.

Alexander's firm chest to his back radiated warmth along his spine and down his arms, enveloping him into a cosy embrace, his head perfectly fitting into the crook of his boyfriend's neck and shoulder, and Magnus could feel each and every one of his breaths, his chest rising and falling at a steady pace... Until Alec rested his hands across Magnus' stomach.

He wouldn't have reacted if they had stayed there, unmoving - but they hadn't. At first the light caresses were just that, innocent and distracted touches as Alec kept watching the movie, but then he seemed to realise what he was doing and his hands lingered, focused, fingertips teasing just at the edge of Magnus' t-shirt.

The young man felt electricity run through his body at that and on impulse, he twisted in Alexander's arms to kiss him. His lips tasted like popcorn and apple juice, like love and tenderness, and they swallowed each other's laughter when Magnus pushed Alec on his back, eager to deepen the kiss.

Hands ran through wayward hair then, adventurous fingers followed the curve of shoulders, trailing down white fabric to catch on buttons, a bit hesitant, looking for permission, before tentatively opening the first one. They broke their kiss as tan skin was revealed, slowly, and Alexander shivered under Magnus' fingertips. He watched him in his discovery, before his own hands grabbed the hem of his boyfriend's t-shirt.

"May I?" Alec asked, looking up at Magnus with a bashful smile.

"Yeah," he whispered, breathless in front of the beauty that was Alexander, at the thought that this wonderful man was his and his alone.

However, all thoughts vanished as soon as his boyfriend sat up to help him take off his top. Straddling Alexander, Magnus surrendered to his fingers and his mouth as he trailed kisses down his throat and splayed his warm hands across his back, holding him, anchoring him. This was unknown territory, for the both of them, so they took their time, often looking at each other to make sure that this was okay, that it felt good, kissing and touching, finding out what they liked, what made them moan, gasp, whine with keenness.

They laughed when Alexander's feet jerked as Magnus tentatively licked around his nipples, unbalancing the laptop that they decided to set on the floor to prevent any incident - and lie more at ease on the bed, side by side. Magnus hooked his right leg around his boyfriend's waist to keep him in place, slowly rocking against him then, arousal boiling in his veins, desire and pleasure assaulting their senses as they closed their eyes and gave in to the sensation.

They stopped before it became too much, panting in each other's mouth, their silence worth more than a thousand words as they smiled and nodded, fumbling with their belts and buttons to get rid of their pants, eager for more skin, less clothing.

Alexander blushed under Magnus' eyes as he gazed at him, but Magnus wouldn't dare to blame him: he might not be flushing as much as Alec, he still felt incredibly vulnerable as they lay naked together, bared to each other's intense stare, giving themselves freely. Yet, that vulnerability wasn't bringing fear nor second thoughts along, only trust and excitation when Alexander timidly shared that he could find lube in the bedside table, if he wanted. When Magnus mentioned the condoms in his jeans, Alec let out a soft laugh, glad to see that he wasn't the only one who had come prepared.

"We don't have to," Alexander reminded him, thoughtful as ever.

"I know," the young man chuckled, his breath warm against Alec's crotch, seconds before he cried out in pleasure as Magnus nosed along his cock, one hand gently wrapping around his length while his tongue darted out to tease at the tip.

He was clumsy and couldn't take him very far but that didn't seem to bother Alec - quite the contrary. Heat surged through Magnus' whole body at the noises that Alexander was making, aching with both need and satisfaction at the thought that he was the one to make the boy writhe, grab at the sheets and thrust his hips up in his search for more pleasure. Magnus soon had to stop though, seeing his boyfriend nearly delirious, shaking all over, fingers twitching. Alec went up for a kiss, soft and lazy, his hands dropping to Magnus' ass to keep them rubbing against each other.

"More," Magnus whispered, aware of what he was asking, never finding in himself the urge to step back, to slow down, but he gasped when Alexander obeyed.

Then it was just wet fingers, reassuring kisses and a light, painful burn, then Alec's hand around his cock to distract him, make him relax, turning him into a blubbering mess as he asked for more, the stretch slowly giving way to pleasure, until all Magnus could think of was Alexander inside him.

"I need you..."

Magnus stayed on the bed, trembling in expectation and lingering pleasure, and he watched his boyfriend stumble all over himself to get to his jeans, lost somewhere under the desk where they had landed, and to the condoms.

 _I love this dork so much_ , he thought with a grin when Alexander stubbed his toe in his haste to get back to him and cursed loudly, collapsing on the bed and muffling his own imprecations against Magnus' mouth. _I love him_ , he thought again, holding his breath as Alec's hands settled on his thighs, spreading them to settle in between, until Magnus had a sudden epiphany.

"Wait, wait, stop!" he exclaimed, sitting up without warning and nearly bumping heads with his boyfriend.

A heavy silence fell over the room as Magnus took a deep breath, soon broken by Alexander's hesitant, almost scared voice.

"Am I doing something wrong?" he asked slowly, guilt already settling over his features.

"No such thing," Magnus said, "I just..."

"You don't want to?" Alexander interrupted him, taking his hand to squeeze it tight, "It's okay, I told you we didn't have to..."

"Hush," Magnus laughed, which had the merit to make his boyfriend relax as he realised that there wasn't any big issue there. "I just need to tell you something."

"O... Okay."

Alec went quiet then, allowing Magnus to gather his thoughts and his courage, until he felt confident enough to say:

"I know myself and I know I'll end up blurting it out at the worst time, probably when this is all over and we're exhausted because of mind-blowing orgasms, and I don't want you to panic and think that it was just a spur-of-the-moment confession so I'll just go ahead and say it while we're both somewhat clear-minded. I love you, Alexander."

Magnus expected a lot of reactions. Tears, maybe kisses of adoration, even a swat because it had taken him so long to wrap his mind around the idea... But he had never imagined that Alexander would _giggle_.

"Really?" he said in disbelief, "I tell you that I love you and you... laugh at me?"

"No," Alec hiccupped, pecking his lips with a radiant smile, "It's just... I already knew."

"What?" Magnus exclaimed, taken aback. "But... How?"

"I wasn't completely sure," Alexander admitted, "But the way you looked at me sometimes... I had my suspicions. Maybe even before you understood it yourself. I'm glad you realised it in time though..."

"Me too," Magnus told him, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend's neck to bring him back down and whisper once more, "I love you."

He would have repeated it several times over, had Alec not claimed his lips again, and they eagerly went back to each other until they became one, two heartbeats aligning, two breathings mingling, two bodies entwined. They didn't move at first, breaths ragged as they both got used to the sensations, then they started slow, never looking away from each other, committing to memory each and every fluttering expression flashing across their faces.

The room was filled with moans and gasps, moments of breathless silence too, and laughter when Alexander whispered _ride me_ , to which Magnus exclaimed _yeehaw, cowboy!_ with a huge grin.

"That was terrible," Alec chuckled.

Magnus agreed with a bark of laughter that turned into a sob when Alexander rolled his hips. He knew that they wouldn't last long, neither of them, young and inexperienced as they were, already overwhelmed by each other. Pleasure ran through his veins with his boyfriend's every thrust but above all, the feeling of being so close to Alexander, more than just with their naked bodies covering one another but with true intimacy and understanding of their love, all of that made them stagger as they kissed once more, hearts beating fast and voices dying in their throat as they cried in ecstasy.

Magnus immediately curled up into Alexander's arms, panting against his chest, feeling it rise and fall at an unsteady pace. His body was tingling in the aftermath of such intense pleasure, Alec shivering around him, and Magnus took it upon himself to grab the blanket to shield them from the air, blowing cold upon their heated skin.

"Are you alright?" Alexander whispered in his ear as soon as he could speak again.

"Yes," Magnus answered, snuggling a bit further into his boyfriend's embrace. "Perfect. Sore, a little."

"Sorry..."

"Don't be," he protested, "I was an enthusiastic participant. How was it for you?"

"World-shattering," Alexander said - coming from anyone else, Magnus would have rolled his eyes at the cheesiness of it but he knew his boyfriend: his words were genuine, translating his exact thoughts.

Magnus couldn't resist pecking his mouth even as he felt tiredness descend on him.

"I love you," he said quietly, relieved that he could say it freely and that Alexander would take it for the truth it was.

"Say it again," Alec shot back with a smile that Magnus felt against his lips.

He did, over and over again, not even thinking of complaining. Alexander had waited for years to hear these words from his mouth, years he had spent knowing that he loved a boy who hated him and thinking that it would never change. Yeah, he deserved to hear these heartfelt _I love you_ 's.

Magnus felt his heart swell with love and a firm confidence in their relationship as he watched Alexander fall asleep, lulled by the sound of his voice, and he kissed his lips as softly as he could before he tucked his head under his boyfriend's chin and closed his eyes.

  


  


He didn't know for how long he'd been asleep when he woke up to the sound of light knocking at the door and the shifting of the mattress beneath him. It took him two seconds of drowsy wonder to eventually realise that he was in Alexander's room, in his bed, and that his boyfriend was awake as well and reaching around Magnus to grab his phone on the bedside table.

The screen lit up all of a sudden and Magnus blinked with a grown, the digits 1:01 printed behind his eyelids. Urgh.

"Go back to sleep," Alexander whispered in his ear, before he kissed his cheek. "It's probably Max... He's been having nightmares lately. He comes to me whenever it happens, says I make him feel safe."

"You do," Magnus mumbled, already half-asleep again, eyelids drooping.

He distantly heard his boyfriend chuckle, felt him get out of bed (and faintly whimpered) as the knocking started again, and he caught the sound of a door opening.

"Hey."

Magnus' eyes flashed open when he recognised the voice. Suddenly wide awake, he sat up in bed, gathering the sheets around his naked self.

"Jace," Alec said coldly, the door only slightly ajar so that his brother couldn't peek inside and see Magnus. "What do you want?"

"I... I don't k... know," Jace stammered.

His voice sounded a bit off to Magnus' ears, thick, almost as if Jace had been crying but... Could Blondie even cry? He didn't feel any empathy for the people - well, Magnus only, hopefully - he was targeting with offensive and hurtful comments, he didn't have any mercy for his own brother's emotions, so what the hell could make him cry?

"C... Can I come in?" Jace asked.

"No," Alec answered without showing any sign of upset, "I'm naked. And not alone."

Magnus stifled a laugh at that, realising that Alexander was trying to make a point about their relationship and surprisingly enough, Jace seemed to get the hint.

"He's here, isn't he?" he whispered, "Bane?"

"His name is Magnus," Alec growled through clenched teeth, "And he's my boyfriend."

Jace stayed silent for a short while, probably processing the new information, as far as Magnus could guess, until he said:

"I told Clary what happened after the competition. She told me I was... awful for what I said to him. To you. I didn't realise..."

"That's your problem, Jace," Alec interrupted him none too gently, "You don't realise the consequences your words or your actions might have, because you don't _think_. What made you even imagine that I could _seduce_ Magnus just to ride Horcrux? For the sake of winning? Do you even know me?"

Jace spluttered something that Magnus didn't manage to understand properly but he guessed - hoped! - that Blondie was trying to apologise to his brother. He was dying to get out of bed and have a conversation with Jace himself but he knew that was something that Alexander had to do first.

"You need to grow up," Alec said again, "And start to see Magnus as he is now, not as the seven-year-old boy who was lucky enough to get in a good family."

Magnus was surprised to hear... nothing. Jace didn't answer right away, which the young man could somewhat understand: he, too, had felt a bit lost the first time he had considered to stop hating Alexander and see him as the good person he truly was. Scratching the ten years of hate between Jace and him wouldn't be as easy as what had happened between Magnus and his boyfriend though.

"You really love him?" Jace asked after a while, "Him? Magnus Bane?"

"Don't say it like that," Alec snapped, "Don't say it like it's something impossible."

"But... For years..."

" _You_ hated him, not _I_ ," Alec stressed, deciding to make things clear once and for all. "I am done standing in your shadow. I love Magnus, he loves me, and I need you to respect that. You don't even have to understand, just... respect us. I'm not asking you to be his friend or to talk to him but... Please, don't be a bully."

Magnus didn't think that Alexander could surprise him any more than he did telling Jace off - and yet! His boyfriend simply shut the door in his brother's face, not waiting for his answer, and he came back to bed so that Magnus' arms could squeeze around his chest. His face showed an array of emotions, from anger to sadness because, after all, Jace was still his brother and fighting with him didn't bring Alec any satisfaction. But it had to be done, if they wanted to be together.

Now, the choice was Jace's to make: Alexander had explained what Magnus meant to him, it was up to Blondie to start changing his behaviour - speaking of which, maybe Magnus should stop calling him Blondie... If Jace made an effort, he guessed he had to as well. But only _if_ he tried being a somewhat alright guy.

"Are you okay?" Magnus asked his boyfriend, just to be sure.

"Yeah," Alexander answered, "I'll let him think about this... And hope that he makes the right choice."

Magnus nodded: for Alec's sake, he hoped too.

"Whatever happens next," he said, ruffling his boyfriend's hair, "at least you tried, which is more than he did. Also, I love you."

"Me too," Alec chuckled, "But wait until the morning when you have to face the whole family at breakfast. I'm not sure you'll still love me by then."

"I will," Magnus swore, sealing his promise with a kiss to Alexander's lips. "But crutches or not, I'm leaving through the window before your family wakes up."

He laughed when Alexander did, amusement echoing in the bedroom until they abruptly quieted down, remembering that the Lightwood siblings and parents were sleeping in the bedrooms next to Alec's. Perhaps they should, too.

"Maybe we can have our next movie night at your place," Alexander suggested after a while, his voice resounding in the thick silence of the night.

Magnus nodded eagerly, pressing Alec's fingers between his own. He couldn't wait.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some information for you: _Blue jeans and blue sky_ is almost over but I've already started writing a new Malec story (a short one, probably) that includes fake dating, only with my own twist, which would give something like this:
> 
> _Magnus is a good friend and the absolute best roommate in the world, so of course when Jace begs him to pretend to be his boyfriend for his family 4th of July barbecue, he says yes. Enters Alec, Jace's gorgeous brother. Aaaand Magnus is screwed._
> 
> Let me know what you think about it so I can decide whether to go for it! Just to be clear, there is no romantic Jace/Magnus, they're just pals helping each other out. Also, I apologise to anyone who tried to talk to me through Instagram: my app doesn't work for more than 5 seconds and I can't access my messages... I'll try to reinstall the app but in the meantime, you can talk to me through tumblr and twitter! Links in my profile :)
> 
> Until next time, for the epilogue!


	16. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are at last, the epilogue! Thank you all so much for every kudo, subscription, bookmark and comment, it has been a pleasure posting this for you and getting your amazing feedback. I hope you'll enjoy this last chapter!

  


Magnus hung up the phone when Raphael snickered at him to spend a good night, and he scowled at his friend through the black screen. He should have called Catarina, at least she would have been supportive - he'd ruled out Ragnor immediately, all too aware that he would have made fun of him. In hindsight, he didn't even know why he'd called Raphael, who was so close to Ragnor when it came to his attitude...

Well, sue him, he'd been eager to share with his friends that Alexander had texted him to invite him over to his place for a special night. He didn't know what to expect, so he had hoped to ask his friends what they thought, what he should prepare himself for... Since their first night together almost three months prior, their code for a night of passion was _movie night_ but this time, Alexander hadn't mentioned that. Hence Magnus' confusion.

He didn't have the time anymore but he really should have called Cat. She would have given him a few ideas or at least some pointers so that he felt a bit more relaxed as he bounced across the street toward his boyfriend's place. Magnus had finally gotten rid of his crutches and his cast two weeks ago and he was enjoying his newly found freedom to the fullest. That meant crazy but still careful rides through the forest - Horcrux had been excited to get his rider back - as well as insane gymnastics during movie nights...

Magnus regretted that he hadn't been able to walk properly during his first night with Alexander, for it would have made his escape through the window somewhat possible; instead, he'd been forced to stick to a more traditional walk of shame... And Max had ruined it: in the morning, Magnus had come down the stairs as silently as he could, Alec supporting him and helping him with his arm tenderly wrapped around his waist. Their furtive mission had been going well, no step creaking under their combined weights, until they'd run into Max after he'd walked out of the kitchen, glass of water in hand and not fully awake, so... The boy had screamed in fright.

Magnus let out a chuckle as he recalled that eventful morning, while bypassing the Lightwood's front door without even glancing at it, heading for the fence of the pasture closest to the road instead. He simply jumped over it, landing lightly on his toes and feeling very self-satisfied when he didn't feel any pain.

If only he'd felt so well three months ago! But no, Max had screamed and he'd had to live through the whole family waking up and catching him and Alec at the bottom of the stairs while they tried to calm the little boy down. Maryse's and Robert's jaws had gone slack with surprise - that bit had been funny, in spite of the circumstances.

Alexander and he hadn't showered yet and they probably smelled a lot like sex, not to mention the bed hair and swollen lips, so... They hadn't exactly been able to come up with a believable excuse to explain Magnus' presence so early in the morning.

Livid, Maryse hadn't had the time to say anything at all, because her husband had weakly uttered _Breakfast, anyone?_ before the situation could go haywire and Izzy had feverishly nodded and pushed Magnus and her brother toward the kitchen. It had been the most awkward breakfast ever. At least Maryse hadn't yelled, probably too furious or shocked to do that, and Jace hadn't opened his mouth. To be honest, he had not even looked at Magnus.

After this disastrous first morning, all movie nights had, understandably, taken place at Magnus'.

The young man crossed the pasture, caressing the horses he met on his way to the fence on the opposite side. Dandy, Excelsior, Bellona... He knew them all by now, just like Alexander knew the names of all the Banes' horses too. Magnus hurried a little, eager to join his boyfriend even though they'd last seen each other two hours before, when they had left school. He slipped under the fence and headed for the barn, where Alexander's text had told him to meet up, and he felt his heart beat a bit faster with impatience, dying to know what his boyfriend had prepared.

"Alexander?" he called when he entered the barn, relaxing at the familiar scent of hay, straw and dust mingling together.

"Hey," came the reply, somewhere to Magnus' right, and he stopped dead in his tracks when he turned and caught sight of his boyfriend.

He had changed out of his school outfit to wear an actual dress shirt but what held his attention the most wasn't Alexander's drop-dead-gorgeous self - there would be time for that later, hopefully. No, instead, Magnus' eyes zeroed in on the two square hay bales that had been pushed together and covered with a tablecloth, on top of which plates and cutlery were disposed, separated by a lit candle - a huge safety hazard but, since Alexander was virtually perfect, he had placed the makeshift table away from the other, very much inflammable bales in the barn.

Magnus panicked a little when he realised that this special night included a candle-lit dinner and he asked, voice a bit too shrill:

"Did I forget something? Our three months anniversary? Your birthday?"

"Hush," Alexander said with a smile, coming at his side to circle his boyfriend's waist with his arms and pull him flush against his chest. "You didn't forget anything. I just wanted to do something nice."

He gestured toward the table and the two stools, motioning Magnus to sit down before he took a huge bowl from a freezer bag next to the hay bales and revealed a pasta salad.

"Did you make this?" Magnus asked with interest as his boyfriend served him a plate.

"Yep," Alexander answered with a hint of pride in his tone, before he added, suddenly less confident, "Uh... Hopefully this will be good?"

Alec's salad turned out to be amazing. Fresh, healthy as could be expected of him, with a good amount of herbs... The two of them eating together in their own private little corner, enjoying a homemade dish, made Magnus smile at the thought that this could be their future, if they wanted to. They'd only been dating for a few months so it wasn't the right time to think about it yet, but... He would like that. Moving in together at some point, having dinner, the both of them, making love in _their_ bed, waking up every morning to Alexander's sweet face and his adorable little snores...

Magnus stopped daydreaming when he realised that Alec was squirming on his stool, growing visibly nervous.

"Is everything okay?" he asked.

"Yes," Alexander answered too quickly, attempting a smile that didn't quite reassure Magnus, "I just... need to ask you something. And show you something. Stay there?"

Magnus nodded, confused, but his boyfriend didn't see it: Alec had turned around and left the barn in a hurry, but he could still hear him make some noise and when his footsteps grew louder, announcing his return, Magnus knew that he wouldn't be alone. The soft sound of hooves was telling enough and he wasn't surprised when Alec reappeared, Eowyn by his side. He still had no idea of what was coming, though.

Upon careful observation, he realised that Eowyn was holding something delicately between her lips, something that Magnus identified as a rose when the mare stepped a bit closer to him. She stopped next to Alec though, waiting for her instructions, but the young man addressed Magnus first:

"I taught her something new for this night," he said, a bit shyly, "Jace helped."

Magnus blinked in surprise. While his relation with Jace still wasn't - and would probably never be - one of friendship, he couldn't deny that they had made progress. After Clary's scolding and his discussion with his brother, the blond teen had made the decision to seek professional help for his abandonment issues as well as his jealousy and his behaviour. It was still a work in progress but at least now they greeted each other with a simple but quiet _hello_ rather than _hey, asshole!_ so yes, progress.

Learning that Jace had helped Alexander to teach Eowyn whatever it was that he wanted to show Magnus on this night, well... It sounded like Jace had made a move to support their relationship. Magnus guessed that he couldn't ask for more.

He focused on Alec again when his boyfriend pointed at him, still sitting on his stool and certainly looking confusedly impatient, and he said to his mare, slowly and clearly:

"Eowyn, give the flower."

Her ears pricked up as she heard the words and her eyes followed the line of Alexander's finger until Magnus, then she calmly stepped forward to cross the distance between them, until she could drop the rose on Magnus' lap. He chuckled, petting her nose.

"Thanks, sweetie," he said, before he noticed the small card attached to the stem.

Glancing at Alexander, he smiled with raised eyebrows before he took the card and opened it, only to close it again after he read the first three words: _Magnus, will you_...

"You know you're supposed to get down on one knee to propose, right?" he asked.

"I'm not proposing... yet," Alec replied with a grin, one that made Magnus' heart beat faster as endless possibilities for the future presented themselves with that simple word: _yet_. "Read the damn note, Magnus."

"Bossy," the latter murmured, "I like it."

Alexander rolled his eyes with amusement and just a tiny bit of frustration that betrayed his nervousness, so Magnus took pity on him and opened the card again to read the full message.

_Magnus, will you go to prom with me?_

The young man looked up from the card and stared at Alexander, who was waiting anxiously for a reply.

"Really?" he asked with excitation, fighting the urge to squeal when his boyfriend nodded.

"Can't be prom king without you," Alec said, smiling and barely able to hide his impatience for an actual answer.

Magnus didn't have to think much about it. A bit more than three months ago, this situation would have been risible because who in their right mind would have even fathomed the thought that Magnus Bane and Alexander Lightwood could stand into each other's close vicinity and not punch something - or someone? But now, this animosity seemed far away, centuries ago almost, and Magnus had made more good memories in three months of relationship than he cared about ten years of confrontation. He couldn't imagine a life without Alexander anymore.

So Magnus stood up and walked toward his boyfriend, kissing him softly before he took a step back, eyes closed as he savoured the taste of Alexander's mouth, and when his eyelids fluttered, when he stared into Alec's eyes again, he gave the same answer he already knew he would give to a whole other question:

"Yes."

There was a breath of relief then, a bark of laughter and wet kisses, and if Magnus and Alexander ended up making love in the hay, it was no one's business but theirs.

  


  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is it! Again, thank you so much for your support throughout this journey, you helped me to stay motivated all along! I mentioned at the end of the previous chapter that I was already plotting my next Malec story, it is now posted! The first chapter is available [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14360721/chapters/33150015), in case you haven't seen it yet.  
> Thank you for everything! :)  
> Edit: extra oneshots set in this universe are now available [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15099524/chapters/35011928)! Enjoy :)


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